Help! Five Beast Alphas Want To Breed Me!!(BL)
Chapter 378: I Will Never Forgive Myself
Zethar;
"It’s a message from Selthía."
His gaze shifts back to me properly this time, an din his eyes, I see something flicker in his eyes.
The first real reaction I’ve gotten from him since I walked in.
"Go on," he says, sitting straighter, and I hold his gaze.
This seems important. I can’t believe I was careless enough to hold on to it for two whole days.
I take a deep breath— respecting the weight behind the words even though I do not understand it.
"She asked me to tell you that the Black Sect has awakened," I inform him, and just as the words leave my mouth, I watch my father turn to ice.
He freezes completely— His eyes growing wide like everything inside him locked at once.
And then I see it. Something I have never seen in my father’s eyes.
Fear.
Not concerned, or calculation... But fear.
Real, raw... Unfiltered fear.
It drains the remaining colour from his face in an instant, and his hand is tightening slightly against the arm of his chair like he needs something to hold onto.
For the first time since I walked into this room, he looks alive. Finally present again... But I hate that it took fear to do that.
"What did you say?" he asks with his voice sharper now. Much stronger.
There’s weight in it again. Not the same as his voice usually carries, but closer.
I raise a brow as I study his reactions to the news.
"You heard me, Father. The... Sect has awakened." I reply, and he shoots to his feet immediately.
The shift from the depressed old man he was just a second ago is drastic. A violent contrast.
The man who looked like he was fading minutes ago is suddenly... Here. Present, focused and seems terrifyingly alert.
"Who else knows?" he demands, and that hits just as fast.
"I–I don’t know. Selthía asked me to tell you. She said to tell you immediately I arrived." I explain, and he steps closer, instantly grabbing my arm with his blue eyes burning with fear and urgency now.
"Don’t play coy with me, Zethar! I’m asking if you’ve told anybody else." He demands, and my brows crease as my gaze drops to his mindlessly tight grip on my arm.
I push it away and take a step back for him.
"I didn’t tell anyone!" I snap, and his gaze locks onto mine, cutting in a way that hasn’t been there since I arrived.
"From the look of things... Only the three of us know?" I add, and he falls silent as he looks away from me.
I quietly massage the place where he roughly grabbed, and he turns his back to me.
I stare at him in silence, and all my thoughts scramble and clash. This isn’t the same man I walked in on.
He’s something else now. Something closer to what he used to be, but there’s a crack in it. I can see it. Feel it.
This reaction of his, and how quickly he snapped out of whatever was wrong with him, tells me one thing.
Whatever this Black Sect is... Whoever they are... whatever they represent... It’s bigger than Father.
I know that because I’ve never seen Father scared before, but right now his shoulders are so tight it seems like the mere sound of that sect shakes him.
He starts pacing the way he always does when he’s lost in thought, and I cross my arms over my chest as I watch him.
"They should never have awakened," he mutters to himself, and I watch without interrupting.
His gaze suddenly snaps back to mine, and I tilt my head lightly.
"You will stay here." He drops the command without warning, and I blink.
"Huh?"
"You will not leave the capital," he continues, and my brows knot in confusion.
I wasn’t planning on leaving the capital, but why did he order it!? Now, all I can think about are the numerous reasons I may want to leave.
I plan on staying here, but not because I don’t have a choice!!
"Father, you can’t—" I try to speak, but he gives me no room.
"I will be leaving for Nagari immediately. You will remain here and assist Lioran, and you are not to speak a word of this to anyone. That is your duty. And that is an order from your king!" He says, and I go rigid.
He’s going to Nagari? Immediately!??
Is... Is this that serious???
"Y-you’re leaving? Right now??" I ask, and he lets out a breath.
"Yes. Se;thia asked you to deliver this message days ago. I’m already late as it stands. I hope I’m not too late." He replies, and my mouth falls open.
Okay... I was wrong to underestimate this. Something horrible is going on.
"And you want me to stay back?? At a time like this!?" I demand.
"Yes."
"That doesn’t make sense. I—"
"It does." He cuts me off, and I frown.
"No, it doesn’t! If something serious enough to make you react like this is happening in Nagari, then I should be—" I begin, and once again, he cuts me short.
"This is not your fight." He snaps, and I freeze.
Not my fight?? Zephan is there! Elian, Aunt Selthia, Koda... my people!! They are all there and he—
"You don’t get to decide that for me," I say, quieter now, but no less firm, and he gives me a look.
The kind you give a hopelessly clueless child.
"I already have." He says with his gaze holding mine firmly.
"What if I’m needed there? My brother—"
"You are needed here. Lioran is also your brother." He interjects, and I fall silent.
"You will stay here, Zethar. Two of my sons are already in harm’s way... I am not tossing another to the flame." He says in finality and silence stretches between us— tight and unyielding.
I search his face. Looking for doubt... For hesitation... For something I can push against to plead, but I find nothing. 𝘧𝑟𝑒𝑒𝘸𝘦𝘣𝑛𝑜𝘷𝑒𝓁.𝘤𝘰𝓂
Only his stubborn determination, and beneath it— I see fear.
My jaw tightens as I understand that he truly will not let me go with him.
"What are you going to do?" I ask, and he lets out a breath.
"I—I don’t know." He confessed, and my heart dies for a second.
I stare at him in horror, and seeing the look on his face, everything starts to click into place.
Selthía’s urgency, his reaction, the shift in him... The command for me to stay...
This is not a small problem. This is not something easy to snuff out...
It’s something strong enough to have both Selthía and Wilhelm reacting like this—
And the horror of that fact settles in my chest.
My family... and my people... all of them are sitting in the middle of something I just walked away from.
Something big enough to bring my father back from whatever state he was in... Something big enough to put fear in him.
And he’s telling me to stay. To sit here...To wait.
My hands clench slightly at my sides.
Then whatever I left behind... May be worse than I can ever imagine. And I just... left them there.
I hold his gaze. But this time I don’t argue.
Because I understand something now that I didn’t before.
I made a huge mistake leaving the people I care about behind like that. They are in danger, and I can’t help.
If anything happens to any of them, I will never forgive myself.