Chapter 88 – Raven’s Confession

The way back to the Royal Palace was uneventful. Cassius didn’t speak to Sarah during the ride, choosing to let her sit with her own thoughts and reflect using all the information available to her.

He needed her in that state. Only in that state would she think through everything that had happened that day — everything she had been through — and arrive at a decision.

A decision that would be made after she went back to Raven’s side.

So it was in that silence that the trio reached the Royal Palace. By that time, the sun had already sunk back into oblivion, letting writhing shadows blanket the world.

Even so, Vorn City was very much alive, with lights covering every street. If anything, the night seemed even more lively than the day.

Cassius could only guess what a night in Vorn truly meant.

Strangely, he was rather curious.

Still, at that time, it was already too late for any meeting with his grandparents, who seemed occupied with some affair of the Kingdom. And frankly, Cassius was far too tired to willingly take part in any kind of discussion with either of them.

The matter of Helene had drained much of his energy. With that thought, he couldn’t help but wonder how priests who received confessions — or even psychologists back on Earth — truly felt when people came to dump their darkest secrets on them, went back feeling lighter, and left you holding their darkness instead.

Those thoughts didn’t last long.

He stepped out of the carriage only to find Persephone had been waiting for him all this time in front of the enormous crimson-black doors of the palace.

With her impassive eyes and voice, she bowed her head with deep respect toward Cassius, ignored the others entirely, and guided him to his room.

Even now, he still didn’t fully understand what was happening with the young doll-like girl who seemed to respect him far beyond what was normal.

He found it strange. But he couldn’t find any clue from how Persephone acted around him.

’Does naming her have such an effect?’ He wondered briefly, before following her lead after parting ways with both Océane and Sarah.

The walk was silent, with Persephone offering little more than curt answers whenever Cassius asked questions.

Minutes later, he arrived at his room. Persephone bowed again and promised him a good dinner.

Looking around, Cassius noticed the room had been his mother’s when she still lived in the palace.

...

"Ouf!" Cassius sighed in relief, exhaling a thick cloud of contentment as he stepped out of the bathroom, a towel around his waist and a smaller one wrapped around his wet hair.

He took in the wide room: all crimson, filled with paintings of blood rain and Ravagers of the Blood Path.

Those Ravagers had rather unique appearances. Clearly they were ones that had evolved beyond Tier Five and reached Tier Four.

He shook his head at his mother’s taste, walked towards the bed made from the bones of Ravagers, and sat at the edge of it, his eyes now fully focused.

’Alright. Time to look at what I’ve obtained.’

System panels flickered into existence before him.

[NEW ACHIEVEMENT! Ragebaiter!]

[Do we need to say anything else?

Your mouth is indeed your greatest weapon, Last Born. Train it a little more and you will be able to kill with your tongue alone.

At this rate, you will earn the title Ragebaiter very soon, we promise you!]

[Rewards: 50 Stat Points.]

[NEW ACHIEVEMENT! New Title!]

[You have been bestowed the title — Lord Seraph — by a being at Fourth Rank: Perfected Self, with strong emotional resonance that touched a faint yet important thread of your Fate. Truly magnificent.

PS: Since when is a Devil like you an Angel? Those Vorn followers are truly a lost cause.]

[Rewards: 50 Stat Points, x2 Boost Ticket.]

’Oh my!’ Cassius exclaimed inwardly in astonishment, pleased at the rewards and the fact he had just gained 100 Stat Points without trying.

But then he paused, his expression shifting into puzzlement.

’Why did I get Stat Points instead of VP?’ He wondered, stroking his chin, trying to identify what was different this time.

Nothing was different except the fact that he had obtained these achievements without the premise of a Fated Quest.

All his previous achievements had come from exceeding the requirements of a Fated Quest.

’But this time I had no quest and still got achievements. Is that why?’

Cassius was curious about the deeper mechanics of his System. Still, not curious enough to waste time on it, considering he had things to do.

Smiling with quiet excitement, he summoned his attributes panel.

[STR: 50 (+4); AGL: 45 (+5); CONS: 75 (+5); PER: 40 (+4); CHA: 62 (+0); Essence: 70 (+5)]

[Stat Points Available: 100.]

’With my current stats after training, plus 100 Stat Points,’ Cassius smiled, ’I can push three of my attributes to the limit of 100.’

Constitution, Essence and Charm.

’That makes me eligible to rank up as long as I obtain an ACS.’

Only the first day at the Capital, and he had already gained enormous benefits.

’Truly, I need to pay Anesthesia more visits.’ He suppressed a laugh.

Ananke’s lips twitched into a smile, watching her Blessed bully a Chosen One.

With these coming improvements, Cassius grew even more confident in his plans for the Event. And not only that, another plan began to sprout inside his mind.

A plan involving the protagonist, Emrys Stormblessed.

[Ah, what are you scheming now, Cassius?]

’Just a little theft.’ He answered, smiling. ’After all, I will need an ACS to rank up, won’t I? And don’t tell me to ask my parents. I can, but they won’t be able to give me anything above Tier Four. Do you know what Tier Emrys has in his possession?’

He shook his head, answering himself without waiting. ’A bloody Tier Two ACS.’

[Who told you he will bring it with him?] Ananke asked the logical question. [That kind of treasure is not something one carries around. And first, how did he even get it?]

’If it were anyone else, fair point.’ Cassius said, ’But we’re talking about Emrys, Queen. The person he trusts most is himself then Anesthesia. He will definitely keep it on him. And if not, his space ring will still have interesting things. He is a Stormblessed. I don’t mind taking a look.’

Ananke could only nod, somehow seeing the logic behind it.

[Be careful. Emrys is not Anesthesia.]

’I know.’

Convinced he had at least gotten his goddess on board, Cassius acted immediately.

’Use my Stat Points. Push Constitution, Essence and Charm to 100.’ He ordered, and 93 Stat Points were deducted from his balance at once.

The next thing he knew, he was falling backwards onto the bed, his mind going blank, his body going through an intense physical and spiritual transformation.

...

’Should I tell him?’

That was what had been occupying Sarah’s mind all this time, spiralling again and again like a whirlwind that refused to settle and only grew faster with each rotation.

And at the end, after exhausting her mental strength, the only conclusion she arrived at was:

’Wouldn’t the Prince adore me and praise me if I proved my loyalty and love to him?’

Wouldn’t he?

After all, if he became aware that not even Cassius Desdemona — everything he offered included — had managed to make her act against him in any way... certainly even if the Prince didn’t love her, he might at least respect her.

Yet at that thought, as if running straight into a wall, Sarah’s thoughts halted. She was surprised at herself for thinking about earning the Prince’s respect.

Since when had she begun wanting that?

’Don’t you dare, Sarah.’ She berated herself immediately. ’You are nothing. You are a commoner. You cannot seek respect from the Prince. Just seek acknowledgement. His pleasure. But this time not with your body!’

It was on those last, dreadful thoughts that Sarah took a deep breath, standing in front of the door to Raven’s room. He had called for her the moment she returned.

She hadn’t wasted time , everything she had bought with Cassius’s money was already inside her ring, now held in her hand.

She planned to reveal everything to her prince!

Decision made, filled with determination and courage, Sarah raised her hand to knock.

"I can hear your heartbeat. Just enter."

Raven’s voice passed through the door and reached her before her hand even touched the wood.

She tensed. With a soft exhale and a quiet prayer to Vorn, she opened the door and stepped inside.

There, standing before his window, was Raven, still wearing the same clothes from the morning.

"You called for me, my prince." Sarah said, bowing her head, her heart slamming furiously against her chest.

Her fingers fidgeted with the ring, unsure how to bring the subject up. Still, she gathered her courage and parted her lips.

"My prince, I have—!"

"Sarah." Raven cut in, his voice calm yet carrying hidden pain.

She fell silent immediately, chest tightening. "Y-Yes, my Prince."

"Is Emrys better than me?" He asked, still not turning to face her. 𝗳𝚛𝗲𝕖𝚠𝚎𝚋𝗻𝗼𝕧𝗲𝐥.𝚌𝚘𝐦

The maid said nothing at first, head lowered. It didn’t last long.

"No, my prince."

"Then why does Anesthesia love him and not me?"

"I... don’t know, my prince." She bit her lip.

"Well, I don’t know either." Raven sighed, "I have done everything I could to earn her love. Everything. Including turning a blind eye to her schemes."

He chuckled with self-mockery. "Does she think she can deceive me with faked emotion? Vorn take me, she can’t, Sarah. I can see she feels nothing for me. I can see it as clearly as I can see your love for me...that she is trying to use me. I can see all of it. I am no fool, Sarah. Truly, I am no fool. But..."

Raven turned, and looked at Sarah, her eyes shimmering with restrained tears.

He smiled, as if somehow glad to see them.

"...I might be something worse than a fool." He admitted, walking slowly toward the frozen Sarah. "I can see all her schemes, yet I can’t bring myself to stop this farce. I can’t bring myself to stop giving her what she wants from me despite knowing her hidden agenda. Tell me, Sarah, am I wrong? I fell in love with her. And yet, Vorn as my witness, I hate her too for putting me through all of this. Don’t look at me as if I am a mindless man. Hear me well, for I dislike talking this much. But today is one of those days when I simply let go."

He smiled faintly.

"There is a difference between falling in love and loving someone, Sarah. And you can fall in love with someone and hate them at the same time. Don’t ask me how I know. I just know. I feel it deeply within me."

By then, Raven was only a breath from her. He leaned forward and took her chin, tilting it upward so their eyes could meet.

He smiled wider.

"You are the same, aren’t you?" He whispered, and kissed her. "You love me yet you hate me. And you can’t let go of me. Just like I can’t let go of Anesthesia. We, Sarah, have something in common. We are like footless birds flying the sky, knowing that the moment we land — the moment we let go of the poisonous love we carry within us — we are dead. Gone."

"W-Why?" Sarah asked, her voice broken. "Why do you inflict so much pain on me, my prince? What have I done wrong? Just what—!"

"Nothing." Raven said. "Nothing but love me. And for you, love is not a gift. It’s a curse. A curse I want you to feel until you are no more."

He began to undress her slowly, with the gentleness of someone who understood your pain yet still let you drown in it.

"Because, my dear, I need your love for me to bear my own unanswered love for Anesthesia."

Sarah broke into tears, sobbing and whimpering, yet still didn’t stop him, only hiding away the ring she had meant to show him, and began to lose herself.

Because she needed to lose herself in order to bear that moment.

And lose herself she did.

Yet before her mind turned entirely blank, swallowed by a burning desire she hated herself for feeling, one sentence summoned itself unceremoniously inside her mind.

"Don’t lie to yourself, Sarah."

—End of Chapter 88—