Seoryeong squeezed her eyes shut, then opened them again.

At his words, countless memories tangled together like twisted threads.

Our once-cozy newlywed life.

That last night, when we had rough sex we’d never done before, leaving marks all over me.

That day when, even in his unconsciousness, he insisted on calling his wife....

But the moment she faced the wounded Lee Wooshin, a tightness gripped beneath her sternum.

It felt like he had stolen even her share of anger and grief—

“Does that feel as unfair to you as it does to me?”

Seoryeong’s face hardened as she snapped at him.

“I was the one deceived. I’m the one going insane. And all this time, you never said a word. If I hadn’t found out, you would’ve kept lying to me until the end!”

“......”

“Approaching me without a word, disappearing without a word...! Meeting me again with a different face, all of it...! Showing me my husband’s corpse, spending the night with me, and then marrying me again—and still, you didn’t say a single—!”

Her voice cracked into a harsh rasp.

“You never said a single word to me!”

“......”

“And even now, it’s the same. You’re not even a little sorry toward me. Not even a fake apology. Why should I take back a man like that? Do you even ❖ Nоvеl𝚒ght ❖ (Exclusive on Nоvеl𝚒ght) feel sorry for deceiving me all this time?”

At that, Wooshin exposed raw emotions—nervous, choked, and confused—without any guard.

“I had Kim Hyeon this close to me, and I still couldn’t find him...!”

She pressed the muzzle into his chest even harder.

“When I was searching for you right in front of your face, what were you thinking?”

Seoryeong clenched her teeth against the blur in her vision. More than anything, she didn’t want to cry in front of Lee Wooshin. She didn’t want to show even a trace of that.

“When I was desperately moving every second to find my husband...! You just stood there and watched. You were Kim Hyeon. You were my husband...!”

Her breathing turned ragged. Dragging up those thorn-like emotions made her whole body ache, as if her skin were being stripped away.

“Looking down on me from above...! Walking shamelessly into the newlywed home we lived in, into our bedroom...! Was there ever a moment when I wasn’t just an assignment to you?”

It was as if their home had been nothing more than a set, and everything she’d done to find Kim Hyeon had been nothing but a performance in the palm of his hand.

Even when she thought she’d finally spoken to her missing husband for the first time... even when she’d kidnapped the Deputy Director... Wooshin, the man she thought was on her side, had been an NIS agent to the bone.

Kim Hyeon had approached Ligai’s daughter.

Wooshin had monitored a former target who’d turned into a dangerous element.

The more she thought about it, the bigger the betrayal grew, until her strength bled away.

“I was always just a target you were surveilling....”

Wooshin sank into the darkness like a man who’d lost the ability to speak. Rotten, clotted blood dripping from his hair splashed onto the bridge of his nose.

“Is there an end to that assignment?”

“Where is there an end between us, Seoryeong?”

The lazy words made her breath catch. Even though she was the one holding the gun, it felt like she was the one being given a finishing shot. Even in his wrecked state, Wooshin’s gaze burned into her.

“You’re my mission. The heaviest thing I’ve ever carried.”

He gripped the long barrel tight and spoke like he was spitting the words out. His gaze devoured her from head to toe with relentless fixation, yet the furrow between his brows looked desperate.

“Even so...”

Seoryeong gave a hollow laugh and closed her dampening eyes.

“The same person, twice....”

“......”

“How do you make someone fall in love twice!”

Her heart had been poor and barren to begin with. And still, she had cleared that desolate land with her bare hands to make a place for him.

She had gathered every last scrap of what little love she had to give it to him. In truth, she didn’t even know how to love properly except the way he’d taught her....

The first love had been deception. The second, also deception. Was it possible for a person to be reduced to something this pitiful?

“That’s why you should lose me once too.”

A thin slip fluttered helplessly in the cold wind. Once she’d poured out the resentment buried at the bottom, fatigue came crashing in. Even the boiling rage seemed to be cooling.

When warmth had been all she longed for, she’d thought it alone would be enough. But it wasn’t.

The world couldn’t be conquered with love alone. Above all, a child who grew up without love couldn’t tell the real from the fake. And so, she always destroyed every relationship she touched.

“I’m sick of you, and I’m sick of this place. So I’m going somewhere without Kim Hyeon or Lee Wooshin.”

“......!”

“I’m done living as Han Seoryeong.”

Only after reaching the land of the beginning had she finally been able to see her own lack. Then, the vengeance and obsession that had filled her mind seemed to be problems born entirely from herself.

Reaching for what didn’t suit her had only ruined her. She slowly lifted her finger from the trigger.

“I’m going back to being Sonia.”

The force that had kept them bound together so tightly began to loosen. As if sensing her release, Wooshin suddenly grabbed the gun from his side.

So...nya? His lips moved silently.

“Sonia?”

His gaze turned dazed, as if she’d caught him off guard. The man who had always been leisurely, even in chains, now wore an unreadable expression.

Perhaps this was what it looked like when every trace of composure vanished. He looked more like he was walking on thin ice than he had when she’d exposed his identity.

Like a man doused in cold water—startled, but with a sharpened awareness—his pupils trembled.

“You... remembered?”

“Seems like the NIS knew I had a past too.”

“......”

“You people really are disgusting.”

Seoryeong lowered her head and gave a quiet, bitter laugh. She felt no more expectations, no more resentment. Only the desire to leave.

“I wanted to leave anyway, so this works out. I’m going back to the place I was meant to be. The place I was born. And how exactly are you going to stop me? Shoot me like that tire?”

“Han Seoryeong, watch your mouth...!”

His growl rumbled from his throat. At the familiar reprimand, her shoulders flinched briefly, but she quickly shook off the useless sentiment.

Just then, blinding headlights cut across them. The rumble of an approaching car shattered their enclosed space.

As Seoryeong began to lower her gun, the man’s expression shifted abruptly. He seized her weapon and refused to let go, his face marked with a certainty and a chilling edge.

“I don’t regret it.”

“......!”

“Loving you twice? So what, Seoryeong. Even if I went back to the day I first got the assignment—”

His jaw clenched.

“I’d still become Kim Hyeon. I’d still be Han Seoryeong’s husband. The best thing I ever did was become your everything, so why would I regret it? If I hadn’t been an agent, I never would have met you. Twice isn’t enough.”

“......!”

“Three times, four times—I’d love you all over again.”

He shoved the gun from his chest, grabbed the back of her neck, and pressed hot lips against her skin, biting down like he was tearing off a piece of flesh before pulling away.

“So I’m not letting you go—not as Sonia, not even as a beast.”

Suddenly, an inexplicable dizziness spun through her head. Over Wooshin’s figure, standing with his grip on the gun, she saw the overlapping image of a pale, beautiful boy.

She shook her head, trying to focus, but it wasn’t working.

Why am I so dizzy all of a sudden? This... this feels like a drug’s effect, hitting me too. Did I... suck on his tongue too much earlier? A flicker of dismay crossed her face.

Even so, the strange hallucination continued. While a boy in a Russian Kubanka hat glared coldly at her, Wooshin was forcing her finger back onto the trigger.

A chilling premonition scraped down her spine. He aimed the muzzle as if judging where to hit, then clamped down on her index finger.

The boy fired at me.

Bang—! Seoryeong’s body jerked back from the recoil.

“Ah...”

It happened before her body could even react. She couldn’t keep up with what had just happened—her dulled mind couldn’t follow.

The cold feel of the trigger, the warmth of the man’s hand forcing her finger down—they were vivid.

Blinking blankly, she saw Wooshin, pale and rigid, cough blood into the air.

“――!”

Only then did she realize smoke was curling from the barrel. What... what is this? What just happened? Her breath caught in her throat. In the cold air, she could almost taste blood.

The car skidding to a stop across the road, a foreign man in the driver’s seat pulling out his phone—

What the hell... Still dazed, she looked down at her own hand, then lower.

“Uh... In... instructor...”

Wooshin was collapsing, blood pouring from his side. His torso had been pierced.

The sight of blood staining the desert red jolted her awake. She lunged forward, and even while coughing in pain, Wooshin seized her wrist.

“...Get this straight. You are never going to Russia.”

Even when he needed pressure on the wound, he refused to let go.

“If you run—”

Even with unfocused eyes, he smiled like he was looking at something beautiful.

“—from this moment on, you’ll be wanted by Interpol for attempted murder of your husband.”