PREVIEW

... ted a conscience and a TED Talk-level vocabulary, there’s still one enormous, putrid, undead problem:

He looks like hell chewed him up and forgot to spit him out.

I mean, how are we supposed to walk around with that? He’s got an exposed cheekbone, a patchy scalp, and a left eye that jiggles like it’s hanging on a wish. If we run into strangers, even if we don’t shoot him, they will. Out of fear, out of reflex, or out of basic goddamn instinct.

"You can’t be serious," I mu ...

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Big news! Big news!

The people of Qingzhou spread the word to each other.

After 200 years of not having any daughters, the Jiang family of Xijin Ferry has finally given birth to a baby girl.

Legend has it that this baby girl was born with great good fortune.

On the day she was born, the long drought-stricken land was blessed with sweet rain.

A few days after she was born, when her elders went up the mountain to hunt, they found a huge spiritual mushroom, resolving the family’s urgent need.

Half a year after she was born, her father topped the imperial exam and was appointed as the top scholar, bringing glory to their ancestors. After becoming an official, under the blessings of little darling, he successively grew new high-yield grain varieties that yielded thousands of catties per mu, shocking the world. It was smooth sailing all the way as he rose through the ranks.

The noble lords looked at Jiang Yuqing subtly gaining favor from the Emperor on behalf of his father, and then at their own daughters who only knew how to fight for attention and be jealous. Tears of envy flowed from the corners of their mouths.

Jiang’s father weakly raised his hand: I swear I didn’t teach her that, do you believe me?

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