Discussing The Correct Posture To Enjoy Dog Food - Chapter 54 - Honey Tangerine Flavored Shadow Guard Gong (12): The little loyal dog: Anyone who offends Master must die

I became a side-character who died in anguish because of her good-for-nothing husband.

If I can’t avoid getting married, why don’t I change who I marry instead?

“Excellent, marriage sounds good.”

“Wise choice. Then let’s have a wedding ceremony that isn’t too ceremonious. Following that, I’ll need you to go down to the Fief and behave like the lady of the house until I call for you. Naturally, there won’t be any time to spend in leisure whilst dousing yourself in luxuries.”

“I’m not marrying you, but your father instead.”

“……Pardon?”

“I’m not going to marry you. Do you have a problem with that?”

For five years, I've lived the life of a failure. Smashing my hands against the wooden target in hopes of entering a meditative state; a necessary step to becoming a cultivator.For five years, I've faced nothing but disappointment, looks of pity, and meager attempts at encouragement.But everything has to come to an end. An end, that for me, became a new beginning!Circuits, wires, and capacitors? Or maybe spirit powder, Spricur crystals, and Qi gathering formations?In a world where cultivation is, for most, merely a hobby and the worlds of mysticism and science are divided, I shall be the one to craft a bridge between the two!Why rely on ancient arrays to harness dense Qi? Isn't it easier to buy one of my converters, plug it into the wall, and be done with it?Is your gaming console malfunctioning, yet no tech shop can find the cause? Have you tried this the exorcising swatter 3.0?And you! Yes, you, the one whose reflection appears on the screen on your phone once you block it! Why would you buy static figurines if you can come to my shop... And get your hands on waifus that will actively flirt with you?Come all ye troubled souls, and allow this God to craft a solution to all your problems!

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”

Ye Yang, the 4th young master of the Ye cultivation clan, was once the weakest member of his family. His feeble cultivation and stagnant growth made him a target for bullying, and he was stripped of his chance to become clan head. While his peers surpassed him, reaching advanced stages like Qi Awakening and Meridian Opening Cultivation Stage, Ye Yang remained stuck at the 9th level of Body Tempering.Ashamed and defeated, he isolated himself from his family, refusing to meet anyone, including his mother Yu Mei and sisters Ye Ling and Ye Mu. Although his father saw him as a disgrace to the Ye family, he still tried to help Ye Yang overcome his limitations. In a desperate attempt to escape his misery, Ye Yang tried to end his life by cutting his wrist. But as he lay dying, a mysterious voice intervened:“If you don't want to live for yourself, then be mine and entertain me.”Ye Yang lost consciousness, only to awaken the next morning to a strange screen window:[Choice-based System][Welcome: Player Ye Yang]This marked the beginning of his transformation, as he embarked on a journey guided by the enigmatic System, confronting his dark past, and uncovering the secrets of his world.