Frightening Joke: Above the Mist - Chapter 286: Last Words

In short: an old lover gave me a little piglet.

Qin Zhuopu, a workaholic, has been single for many years. As he reaches middle age, his family is desperate for a child.

Until one day…

“Mr. Qin, your son is already in primary school!”

“???” I have only had one boyfriend!

Seven years after the breakup, the old lover returned to the wealthy family with a little fat pig in his arms: “Zaizai is a big eater, I can’t feed him. Zaizai’s primary school homework is too difficult, I can’t do it. I’ll give you guardianship from now on! Will you let me go to your construction site to move bricks? Son, say ‘Mommy’!”

Mr. Qin: (No, I couldn’t give birth to such a fat kid!)

Later…

Onlookers: I heard that Mr. Qin has adopted an illegitimate child born to his old lover by some woman?

Mr. Qin: Let me introduce to you, this is my own cub!

- Description from Novelupdates

On her wedding night, Jian Ran met Zhou Huai'an, the man rumored not to like women.After that, she was cautious and humble in front of Xu Zichuan every day.Until that night, when blood flowed and rain poured, she learned the truth.She collapsed in the pouring rain, hugging herself, laughing madly with tears streaming down her face.Then, she slowly bent her proud spine, trampling her dignity into the mud.In the end, when Jian Ran left, Xu Zichuan went mad.Zhou Huai'an kneeled on the ground, “Jian Ran, I was wrong. What must I do for you to return to my side?”

“They Call Guys Like Me a Simp.”(Meanwhile, I’m out here living what their favorite MC only dreams about.)You ever notice how stories glorify the ones who feel nothing?The MC who never laughs.Never feels.Who plays women like chess pieces and calls it intelligence.He manipulates a girl? “He’s strategic.”He never opens up? “He’s mysterious.”He never flinches, never laughs, never lives —And you call that strength?Funny.Because to me?That’s just a prison in disguise.You see an “alpha.”I see a boy too scared to feel anything real.While they spend ten chapters monologuing about logic and sacrifice,I’m already making the Saintess scream,drenched in sin,halo cracked,legs trembling from truths her prayers never taught her.And I didn’t get there with cold eyes or control.I got there with laughter and chill. With warmth. With a grin and a hand on her thigh.I didn’t need to dominate her mind —I freed her heart.But that scares people, doesn’t it?Because readers trust the ones who suffer.Who stay quiet.Who kill without blinking and love without showing it.But me?I flirt.I laugh.I take hits and smile back, bloody and defiant, as if too weak to get angry.I don’t need to pretend emotions are weakness.I weaponize mine.Pleasure. Connection. Laughter.That’s my arsenal.And while your favorite MC is still calculating his next five moves,Trying to outwit death and romance like both are math problems,I’m already balls deep in the jade fairy — her sacred yin furnace clenching like it’s worshipping my shaft, her Dao Echo shattered into breathless moans, and her so-called cultivation path leaking down her thighs while she begs me to break her meridians again.You call that luck?Nah.That’s mastery of the three worlds.Because in a world that respects coldness,I came in hot.Where others manipulate, I connect.Where they posture, I play.Where they sacrifice, I seduce.So go ahead.Call me a simp.But while your genius MC is busy monologuing about destiny,I’m the one making goddesses question theirs —with a smirk, a touch, and no regrets.I’m not the hero.Not the villain.I’m just a simp… the kind who leaves your cold, emotionless MC’s woman dripping, ruined, and too stretched to go back to him.

He became a teacher at the best magic academy in the empire.
….For being mistaken for someone else.