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... outhful of beer on his friends and coworkers, none of whom cared. He picked up his phone and, for the first time since he’d had a smartphone, fumbled to unlock it under the expectant gazes of his good brothers.

He finally unlocked the phone and opened the email and his lips mouthed the words as he read it. Then he tossed his phone back to the tabletop in disappointment and chugged his beer before saying, “It wasn’t from the empire. But if you want bigger dicks, boy do they have some pill ...

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