I Am A Gourmet: Just Eight And You Want Me To Start A Roadside Stall? - Chapter 142 - Parents’ Return

Tian Han was a young boy who admired immortals. His dream had always been to become like them—flying on swords, using spells. But he was just an ordinary village boy, and he didn't have much of a chance for that. So, he always read books about immortals, and his admiration for them grew more and more every day. One day, he heard that he had a chance to become an immortal.“You can become immortal.”This was the sentence where his adventure began. Yes, he could become an immortal. And so, his journey started, and he found himself in the ruthless world of immortals.

Mum ran away, dad’s crippled, and I’m about to be sold to a brothel.

Qiao Xiaomai rolled up her sleeves in anger: If you’ve taken from me, regurgitate it.

If you’ve seized what’s mine, return it.

All scumbags, clear off.

A certain man finished tidying up the mess, rolled up his sleeves and pulled Qiao Xiaomai into a light laugh: “My lady, if you’re this fiery and domineering at night, your husband…”

Qiao Xiaomai raised an eyebrow, patted the spot next to her: “My dear, come warm the bed~”

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In a world where summoners wield the power to call forth vampires, elves, angels, demons, and all humanoid creatures from across the realms, Nathan found himself unable to summon beings except from beasts. However, those beasts are not ordinary beasts. They are divine beings who once stood at the same level, if not higher, than the legendary creatures the world ever knew. Casting his gaze to the left, Nathan sees numerous summoners accompanied by the likes of demon kings, archangels, vampire progenitors, and other legendary beings. Turning to the right, a massive army of alien symbiotes is waiting to attack. There was no fear in his eyes, because standing on his left is a majestic wolf who managed to kill a god, the legendary eight-headed serpent coils on his right, above him is the bird who is glowing like the sun, and behind him is a dragon that once gnawed the roots of the world tree. “Let the war begin.”

Guys here is my pitch.....In the sprawling world of fantasy, we’ve often been treated to tales of heroes reincarnated with divine blessings, legendary powers, or cheat-like abilities, thrust into magical lands as shining saviors—or chaotic terrors. But what happens when the very concept of reincarnation becomes a curse? When the divine boon is a big fat joke, and the “cheat system” doesn’t quite… cheat?Enter John, the unluckiest reincarnate. Blessed by a god and thrust into a fantasy world, he dreams of glory, power, and adventure—only to wake up as a normal, utterly powerless bird. Not a mythical phoenix, not an ancient thunder eagle. Just… a bird.To make matters worse, this world is no ordinary realm. It's a land scarred by the devastating legacies of past isekai’d heroes and villains, whose reckless exploits piled skeletons into mountains and turned their cheats into harbingers of chaos. Fed up with these unruly intruders, the ancients of the realm banded together to create a world-shaking seal: all reincarnated souls are trapped in the bodies of harmless animals, confined to isolated sanctuaries that function more like fantasy zoos.Here’s the twist: this isn’t mercy. It’s a resource grab. The powerful beast tamers of this realm have turned these reincarnated souls into exotic pets, prized for their cheat-like potential.John finds himself at the bottom of the food chain in every sense. His cheat doesn’t work. His human form is gone. And his world is filled with predatory cultivators who see him as either a snack or a tool.But John isn’t one to give up so easily. What starts as despair quickly turns into cunning survival. With wings and wit as his only tools, John must navigate layers of misfortune, dodge fate’s sharp talons, and cheat his way through a world determined to keep him grounded.Get ready to join John on a wildly unconventional journey—one where reincarnation isn’t a ticket to greatness, but a death sentence he’s determined to rewrite. His story is one of humor, wit, and persistence, as he explores a world where he is the joke and his survival is the punchline.Main tags: reincarnation/isekai, beast taming cultivation system, comedy, action, adventure.Of course No-harem!