Netori: Reborn as the Human Aphrodisiac - Chapter 57: The Law of the Biggest Balls

Waking up from a big dream, Fu Yu felt that he had been forced into a mouthful of pie by God.

Everything familiar, suddenly becomes virtual.

Working kitchen table, tools used, co-workers, and customers.

All things have become walking NPCs and auxiliary props.

Daily life and work have become the main tasks that need to be completed, and the key clues for advancement.

 …

The customer ordered a piece of loose pork.

Fu Yu took out a piece of fresh tenderloin: [Pork: Freshness: 90%]

Holding an egg with one hand: [Egg: Freshness: 85%]

Heat oil in a pan, prepare starch, and prepare onion, ginger, and garlic.

First fried and then fried, the meat is cooked out of the pan, put on a plate and served in front of customers: [Ding! Complete the task with a slice of loose meat. Get rewards: cooking experience +10, RMB +100, a colander without oil! 】

 …

As a chef who is being chased and fed by God, as long as you cook, you will be promoted!

- Description from novelbuddy

Kwan Dae-ha.

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”

I became a side-character who died in anguish because of her good-for-nothing husband.

If I can’t avoid getting married, why don’t I change who I marry instead?

“Excellent, marriage sounds good.”

“Wise choice. Then let’s have a wedding ceremony that isn’t too ceremonious. Following that, I’ll need you to go down to the Fief and behave like the lady of the house until I call for you. Naturally, there won’t be any time to spend in leisure whilst dousing yourself in luxuries.”

“I’m not marrying you, but your father instead.”

“……Pardon?”

“I’m not going to marry you. Do you have a problem with that?”