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... he first time was not as big as I thought it would be, rather, it shocked me.

It’s not that I’m completely composed after having just killed a person, but my mind had accepted it as inevitable, and I was shocked at myself.

Now if I had to say how I am right now, I am being praised and pampered by Sophia and Maria inside the carriage.

It seems they thought that I was terribly shocked by having killed people for the first time.

I am not against being pampered comple ...

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