Anthesis of Sadness-Chapter 22: What I Owe You

I was awakened by the warmth of the first rays of sunlight caressing my face. It was a soft, soothing sensation... How long had it been since I'd felt that?

I had managed to rest my mind for an entire night. A night without tension, without waking up with a start, without that crushing weight on my shoulders. For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt a burden lift.

I gently turned toward Cassandre. She, on the other hand, had stayed awake all night, keeping watch with her eternal vigilance. Her face, bathed in the golden morning light, seemed peaceful.

I didn't need to question the herbal tea she'd made me drink the night before. I already knew the answer—I felt it deep within me.

Once again, that benevolent warmth filled me.

She had done so much for me... even though we barely knew each other. Without expecting anything in return.

But after walking together, talking, staying silent, observing one another... that "short time" had come to mean months. In this world, closeness is born in survival, not in calendars.

She was, undeniably, a goddess in human form.

I didn't need unnecessary words. Just one sentence, carried by absolute sincerity, by a raw feeling that consumed me entirely.

— "Thank you... truly, thank you so much..."

She didn't reply.

She simply smiled at me. A warm, radiant smile that said more than any words could.

And that was enough.

The day passed in a flash, punctuated by our increasingly deep conversations, my training in blood manipulation and improving my identification spell, and Cassandre, who spent a good part of her time collecting herbs and mushrooms.

The forest around us was of an unreal beauty. A dense, almost supernatural nature, where flowers with glowing petals spread a soft azure light beneath the shadows of ancient trees. Moss formed a plush carpet beneath our feet, dotted with mushrooms of vibrant colors, some even releasing a light phosphorescent mist when brushed.

As we moved forward, Cassandre stopped in front of a massive root blocking our path. Its wood, blackened by time, snaked across several meters, forming an imposing obstacle.

She tried to climb over it but slipped slightly as she tried to get a foothold. Without thinking, I reached out my hand.

— "Here, grab on."

She looked up at me, a flicker of surprise in her eyes before a playful smile lit up her face.

— "Are you playing the chivalrous knight?" she joked, taking my hand.

I rolled my eyes, pretending to be exasperated.

— "If you'd rather struggle on your own..."

— "No, no, it's fine!" she laughed, hoisting herself up with my help.

Once on the other side, we resumed our walk, enjoying the spectacle the forest offered. Occasionally, a rustle in the foliage made us turn our heads, but nothing truly threatening.

Well, almost nothing.

We came across a few low-level Xelorath—dark-carapaced insectoid creatures with sharp appendages and scarlet eyes. Nothing too spectacular.

I quickly took care of them, launching a blood needle with surgical precision. Each crimson dart pierced their skulls, felling them instantly.

Cassandre watched me, arms crossed, an admiring pout on her face.

— "Cold, efficient... almost a little scary."

I raised an eyebrow.

— "Weren't you the one telling me yesterday that I should protect you?"

She shrugged, a smirk on her lips.

— "True. But seeing you in action is something else..."

A silence settled, broken only by the crystalline song of a nearby stream.

Then she added, feigning indifference:

— "I guess it's reassuring to have someone like you by my side."

A slight smile tugged at my lips, but I said nothing.

We simply continued our path, walking together in this mystical forest, in the heart of a world that seemed to belong to another dream.

Night fell, wrapping the forest in a veil of darkness dotted with shimmering lights. We settled in a small clearing, gathering wood and stones to build our campfire.

It was finally the moment we'd been waiting for. The time for our bet.

Which I was obviously going to win, I thought with an inward laugh.

Cassandre, already in place, shot me a mischievous look.

— "So, are you ready?"

We knelt before our carefully arranged piles of wood, a single spark enough to declare the winner.

Cassandre raised her hand.

— "Three... Two... One..."

— "GO!" she shouted, totally excited.

A smile spread across my face.

I felt good. Calmed by the previous night, carried by this friendly competition that reminded me how much I had missed moments like this.

We focused immediately on our task. Sparks danced under our fingers, the wood crackled slightly beneath our hurried movements.

Then, in barely ten seconds...

A flame rose in front of Cassandre.

I froze, stunned.

— "Wait... what?"

She gave me a triumphant look, arms crossed.

I squinted at her, mock suspicion in my voice.

— "So you were hiding your skills?"

She burst out laughing.

— "What matters is that I beat you."

She puffed out her chest proudly, savoring her victory.

— "And now, you have to keep your word. A bet is a bet!"

Her radiant smile, her enthusiastic voice... I couldn't help but accept my defeat in the face of her contagious energy.

We settled near the newly lit fire, its light dancing on our faces, casting flickering shadows around us.

Cassandre, sitting cross-legged, looked at me with barely contained impatience.

— "We'll eat later." Her smile widened. "Tell me everything. I want to know it all."

I exhaled slowly. So here we were.

When was the last time I opened up to someone?

Ah yes... The last time was with Lucas.

Lucas...

I looked up, a sad smile brushing my lips. I miss you, brother.

A silence fell. Cassandre said nothing. She waited. Her expression, usually light and carefree, had become more serious. She didn't want to rush me.

I took a breath.

— "You're going to be disappointed..." I finally whispered. "But I don't know who that person is. I mean, that... illusion."

She didn't interrupt, just watched me with infinite patience, giving me time to find my words.

I liked that side of her too.

— "She appears when my mind is at its lowest. Even before the tutorial, she was already there."

My voice grew more hesitant, more uncertain.

— "I don't know when she first appeared... But every time I'm lost, she comes back."

I paused, staring at the flames crackling before me.

— "It's like a poison." I clenched my fists. "She whispers my worst fears, keeps saying I'm a coward, constantly puts me down."

My throat tightened.

— "I don't know why. I don't know... I don't know what I did to deserve this."

The words spilled out in an uncontrollable, raw, painful flow. I know nothing.

And then, suddenly, Cassandre moved.

Before I could react, she had pulled me into her arms, enveloping me in a soft, reassuring embrace.

My breath hitched.

Her voice whispered in my ear, a warm breath in the cool night air:

— "It's okay. Everything's fine. You don't need to say more."

She tightened her hold slightly.

— "I understand... It couldn't have been easy."

A silence.

Then, even softer:

— "I'm here now. Let go."

I hadn't even noticed at first, but while I was talking, tears had begun to fall.

Was I really that hurt?

Of course I was.

But I was getting better. And I had to keep going.

I let myself rest a little longer in Cassandre's embrace, surrendering to what she offered: a moment of respite, a comforting warmth. Then, slowly, I gently pulled away.

Our eyes met.

Embarrassed, I looked down slightly, not knowing what to say.

Cassandre, however, didn't hesitate.

— "You know... a few months ago, I went out alone to gather herbs."

Her voice, usually sparkling, had lost its cheer. Her smile had faded.

I said nothing, giving her space to speak.

— "I was walking happily, carefree..." She paused, as if reliving the moment. "I had never faced real danger before that. I was naive."

My stomach tightened.

— "Then I came across a group."

A shiver ran down my spine.

— "They started beating me." Her voice lowered. "The men spoke about my body, about my beauty..."

My heart pounded harder.

— "But before anything else could happen..." She took a deep breath. "A wave. A ghost."

I straightened slightly, attentive.

— "He appeared... and he killed everything there."

My breath caught.

— "No one understood what had happened. But... there were seven corpses on the ground. And him, standing in front of me."

My blood froze.

Was that... me?

I couldn't breathe. I didn't remember.

Cassandre looked down, reliving that night through her memories.

— "He looked at me... And I was paralyzed."

Her voice barely trembled, but I saw her hands unconsciously clench on her knees. She wanted to be strong, but the memory still cut through her like a cold blade.

She swallowed hard.

— "I was afraid. Terrified by what I had just witnessed."

A silence.

— "He was a creature. Not human."

My heart clenched even more.

— "Then he looked away... as if he had just realized something."

Her hand trembled slightly.

— "He walked toward something."

She finally looked up at me.

— "Something that shouldn't have been there."

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out.

She inhaled slowly.

— "He looked like a monster... but I saw him."

She placed a hand on her heart.

— "In his eyes, there was only fear."

Her words hit me like a dagger.

— "He was broken."

My throat tightened.

— "He screamed something."

She closed her eyes, as if she could still hear it.

— 'No! No! No! I don't want to know.'

A chill ran down my spine.

— "His gaze changed. Fear consumed him."

She slowly raised her head toward me.

— "And then... just as he had appeared... he disappeared."

I felt my heart skip a beat.

— "So that's what it was..." I murmured.

Cassandre nodded gently before continuing.

— "When I returned to the clan, wounded, shattered..." Her voice grew softer.— "I couldn't forget that man."

I stood still.

— "I talked about it with the group."

She looked at me intensely.

— "And that's when I learned your name."

A silence.

— "Anthony."

I closed my eyes.

— "Marie told me your story."

I didn't dare move.

— "I felt sorry for you."

Her words resonated within me, breaking down the walls I had built.

— "Because I knew..."

She placed a hand on mine.

— "...that you were so much more than a monster."

I clenched my teeth.

— "That man, the one who saved me—maybe in spite of himself..."

She smiled faintly.

— "I wanted to return the favor."

Her voice softened again.

— "I wanted to help him through his suffering."

A deep silence fell between us.

Then she continued, even more gently:

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— "So I specialized in healing."

I blinked, surprised.

— "Not just physical, but also mental."

She gently squeezed my hand.

— "I absorbed all the knowledge I could."

She gave a nostalgic smile.

— "I created potions to soothe."

A spark lit up her eyes.

— "Recipes, infusions, remedies..."

I listened, fascinated.

— "I even learned a mental healing skill."

She shrugged slightly.

— "I wanted to repay my debt."

Her gaze deepened.

— "I wanted to help... from the bottom of my heart."

Then, her voice nearly broke into a whisper:

— "When I found you... half-dead on that ground..."

I shivered.

— "I knew I had made the right choice."

She smiled faintly.

— "Despite your physical wounds..."

She looked straight into my eyes.

— "What took the most time..."

A silence.

— "Was healing your mind."

She inhaled, as if holding back an emotion she didn't want to let out.

— "But I finally did it."

She gave my hand one last squeeze before concluding, in a soft and sincere voice:

— "And today... you've become a man again."

She smiled.

— "I've finally given back what I owed you."

The crackling fire danced in the silence of the night, casting flickering shadows on Cassandre's face.

I looked at her, caught in an awkward silence, as the wind gently played with her blond hair.

They captured the firelight, shining like strands of gold.

Without thinking, I raised my hand and tucked a strand behind her ear, brushing her skin with my fingertips.

She didn't pull away.

I lost myself for a moment in her blue eyes, the very ones that had saved me once.

Little by little, I leaned closer.

My breath mingled with hers, my heart beating faster.

Then, gently, my lips met hers.

She didn't push me away.

On the contrary.

She accepted me.

And in the silence of the night, our bodies sought each other, found each other...

And we gave ourselves to one another.

That night, no one stood watch.