Building a Kingdom as a Kobold-Chapter 52: The Surface Is Trying To Kill Us And Also I Hate It

The arch behind us crackled faintly as we stepped through. The dungeon was gone. The world outside was... worse.

I know what a forest should look like. I lived in a world with trees, birds, air, and all the normal, non-glowing, non-threatening variations of nature. This was not that.

The sky overhead stretched wide and blue. Fine. Normal. But the trees were too tall, too twisted. The grass shimmered faintly underfoot like it had opinions. The wind changed direction mid-gust just to slap me.

"Ugh," I muttered. "Fantasy."

The system chimed smugly.

[Warning: You Have Left Dungeon Safety Zone]

[Biome: Unknown Surface Environment]

[Survival Prediction: Low]

[Optional Quest: Turn Around And Go Home]

Not happening.

The others followed me out slowly.

Relay gasped, dropping to one knee and immediately scribbling into his journal. "The moss is hexagonal! Why is the moss hexagonal?"

Tinker waved his battered scanner wildly. "I'm getting readings I don't have classifications for. That's not supposed to happen."

Cinders crouched and poked a large floating dandelion seed. It exploded into purple smoke. She coughed and glared at me like it was my fault.

Glare stood dramatically under a crooked tree. "The air tastes of forgotten storms."

Flick spun in a slow circle, staring upward. "There are clouds. Clouds are fine. Why do they keep drifting sideways?"

I stared as a distant stone pillar floated lazily across the horizon, just... drifting along like that was normal.

I sighed heavily. "Because the world hates me."

The trees ahead shifted in color from blue to dark green as we walked. Leaves rustled with no breeze. Strange bird calls echoed and then answered themselves. The ground sloped unpredictably, moss-covered stones rising and falling like breathing earth.

Relay sketched furiously. "This violates at least fifteen logical principles."

"Only fifteen?" I deadpanned.

Tinker froze to scan a patch of translucent mushrooms. They disappeared before our eyes. His scanner beeped [Error: Reality Inconsistency].

"I hate it here," I muttered.

The system, unhelpful as always, pinged again.

[New Zone Logged: Surface World]

[Congratulations?]

[Optional Quest: Run Back Screaming]

I walked forward.

The sound of running water teased at the edges of hearing. Strange luminous flowers blinked open and closed slowly, like they were breathing.

I let the squad wander ahead, staring at everything.

I used to live in a world with normal forests. Trees stayed put. Mushrooms didn't teleport. Wind didn't change direction out of spite. freeweɓnovel.cøm

I stared flatly as another floating stone drifted lazily past.

"This is what I get for reincarnating somewhere stupid," I muttered.

The wind immediately slapped me across the face again.

Of course it did.

We continued deeper into the so-called forest.

The ground refused to stay flat. Roots curled into inconvenient trip hazards. Stones shifted when stepped on, then shifted back smugly. Plants sparkled faintly under the dappled light like they wanted me to know they existed.

I ignored them all. I refused to be impressed.

Cinders crouched next to a spiky blue bush. "Think I can cook this?"

The bush twitched aggressively.

She stepped back quickly. "Never mind."

Flick slipped on wet moss and vanished into a low hollow with a muffled yelp. His bell chimed softly from somewhere underground. "I'm fine!"

Relay almost walked straight off a tiny cliff and had to be yanked back by his tail.

Tinker's scanner beeped again. [Unknown Myth Fluctuations Detected: Increasing]

I stopped.

"That's bad, isn't it?"

"Yes?" Tinker answered brightly. "Maybe? Possibly? I'm still running the numbers."

Of course he was.

The sun—or whatever passed for a sun here—began dipping behind jagged ridgelines. Long shadows crept across the ground unnervingly fast.

The temperature dropped hard.

We stopped at a narrow clearing surrounded by twisting trees. I called for camp.

Disaster followed immediately.

Relay's tent collapsed before it was finished.

Flick tangled himself in the guy ropes again and claimed it was "combat practice."

Cinders chased floating seeds away from her fire pit with a spoon.

Tinker declared his scanner was now just "guessing."

I stared into the middle distance.

The system helpfully chimed.

[Surface Survival Status: Tragic]

[Recommendation: Return To Dungeon]

[Probability You Will Listen: 0%]

Correct.

As I settled near the low campfire, something shifted.

The flame shard at my side pulsed faintly. The air grew heavier. I froze.

Beyond the camp edge, between the trees... movement. Subtle. Too smooth.

I narrowed my eyes.

Humanoid shapes.

Slim silhouettes moving silently between trunks.

No sound. No footsteps. Just presence. Watching.

The squad hadn't noticed.

I didn't move, barely breathed. My claws tightened on the flame shard instinctively.

The system pinged softly, almost hesitant.

[Warning: Entities Detected]

[Classification: Not Dungeon Origin]

[Recommended Action: Fear]

The figures drew closer. I stood slowly, tail low, shoulders tense.

"I think," I whispered, "we're not alone."

The clearing went dead silent.