Captured By The Cold Detective (BL)-Chapter 579: With Him Too?

"Do you hate me now?" Mu Yuze whispered, his voice oh so soft and vulnerable.

When He Juan looked at him like this, he seemed to see the shadow of Mu Yuze’s past self. Not the mature, confident and capable man, but a child who was still fraught in anxiety. A child who was afraid to be left all alone.

And that sight was akin to a hard blow on his head, sending his mind reeling in shock. What had he done? Seven years ago, he had left while convincing himself again and again that Mu Yuze would surely recover from this, that he would forget He Juan as he grew older, that this would be nothing more than a short bitter episode in his life.

But the cruel facts before him now told him otherwise.

Mu Yuze’s pain, his fear, his grievance— none of it had changed since then. His feelings had not lessened even one bit.

It was not only He Juan who was still stuck in the past, unable to move forward. But Mu Yuze too.

What have you done, He Juan? What kind of atrocious and terrible thing have you done to him?

"No..." He Juan let out a shaky exhale, his trembling hand moving on its own accord toward Mu Yuze’s cheek, intending to wipe away the hateful tears staining those delicate features. But then, he abruptly stopped midway. Somehow, he was afraid that this was all but a dream. He was afraid that if he were to touch Mu Yuze right now, then the man would fade away or shatter into pieces, leaving him with nothing but the void in his chest and the realization that there was no way all of this could be happening to him, of all people. There was no way he could have Mu Yuze all to himself. And it was for that reason that He Juan let his hand fall limply to his side, even if his heart was torn to shreds upon doing so. "No, Mu Yuze. I don’t... there’s no way I could hate you..."

He Juan attempted to put his emotions into words, but it was hard. So very hard. He felt like it was not enough, that anything he said would not be enough to compensate for the torment Mu Yuze had to go through.

Would it be easier if it were the other He Juan? Would he know how to comfort his mate and stop making him sad? Was Mu Yuze disappointed that the one who returned was not his lover, but He Juan who had abandoned him in the past?

Once that thought flashed in his mind, He Juan found himself unable to root it out entirely.

The doctors had advised him that one of the ways he could regain his memories faster was to stop dissociating himself from the other He Juan. They were, after all, the same person and he needed to make a conscious effort to ingrain that idea into his mind. But how... how was He Juan supposed to do that when their lives couldn’t be more different from each other?

How was he supposed to do that, when the other He Juan could easily obtain what he would kill to have?

Be it a peaceful and ordinary life, a normal job, or Mu Yuze...

"...Gege?" Mu Yuze called out to him in an alarmed tone upon seeing his complexion grow paler and paler.

Alas, He Juan couldn’t hear anything except for the blood rushing beside his ears. His heart was pounding erratically, cold sweat formed over his skin, and his head felt like it was on the verge of exploding from the searing pain. Sweat clung to his lashes, turning his sight blurry. He attempted to open his mouth, to tell Mu Yuze that he was fine.

Yet all of a sudden, the world tilted on its axis and he staggered.

"Gege!" Mu Yuze rushed forward to catch him before he could crash to the ground, his arms trembling to endure the full brunt of He Juan’s weight. A horrified gasp escaped his lips when he perceived that He Juan’s back was soaked in sweat, and he looked as if he was struggling to breathe.

Oh no, He Juan was having a panic attack!

"Gege, can you hear me? Gege!" He tried to reach He Juan with his voice to no avail.

This was clearly not the first crisis Mu Yuze had ever encountered. Hell, he could still remain composed when he faced a criminal who held a child hostage with a knife to their throat. Such was the professionalism of Officer Mu, the core member of the Violent Crime Unit.

However, it was different now. In front of He Juan, he was no longer the cold and frosty Officer Mu; he was just Mu Yuze, a man deeply shaken by the sight of his beloved Gege in pain. The fear he felt at that moment was insurmountable.

Without a second thought, Mu Yuze extended a hand behind his neck and tore off two layers of his gland patch at once, allowing his pheromones to fill the air around them. He hugged He Juan tighter and led the trembling man to lean on the crook of his neck where the pheromones were the warmest and thickest.

Desperation laced his words as he pleaded, "Gege, calm down! Can you take a deep breath for me? Please...!"

His distressed voice managed to break through the chaotic ringing in He Juan’s head. Somewhere deep within the tumult, his Alpha recognized that voice as a cry from his mate and it disregarded the defense mechanism of his body in favor of responding to it.

With a gasp, He Juan finally took the much-needed air into his aching lungs and—

This is it, he thought in a daze as he was surrounded by the sweet scent of lavender tinged with the coolness of peppermint. This was what had been missing whenever he used the aromatherapy oil; this was what he had been searching for all along.

The pheromones worked like a magical remedy, rapidly dispelling his intense headache. A wave of intense relief and delight washed over him, making him feel like a caveman seeing the grandeur of the rising sun for the first time.

He Juan’s body slumped like a marionette with its strings severed, and only then did he realize that... he was leaning on Mu Yuze, his nose tucked into the crook of Mu Yuze’s neck, so dangerously close to his gland.

How did they end up in this position? The distant part of He Juan’s mind wondered. Alas, that question was swiftly forgotten when he fully registered that he had Mu Yuze in his arms. Mu Yuze, warm, real and solid. Mu Yuze, who was continuously releasing soothing pheromones to calm him down. Mu Yuze, whose arms around him felt like a stable anchor.

He Juan’s eyes burned, and he almost cried at how right it felt to have the omega in his arms. It was as though they were two halves of a puzzle who had finally come together to create a perfect picture. Oh God, how he had longed for this...

Slowly, ever so slowly, He Juan raised his arms and encircled them around Mu Yuze’s body, his heart racing when his fingers brushed against the omega’s warm naked skin. He felt Mu Yuze stiffen for a second before his body relaxed against He Juan, and it was literally the cutest thing He Juan had ever seen in his life.

"...Sorry," he murmured, his voice still so embarrassingly hoarse.

Mu Yuze quietly shook his head. "It’s okay. Are you feeling better?"

"Mn," was all He Juan managed to say with his constricted throat. He was still struggling to come to terms with the reality before him. Before today, he had been so certain that all he would do was to watch over Mu Yuze from afar, but all of a sudden, he not only met Mu Yuze again, but he also discovered that they were lovers!

How could such a good thing happen to him?

He couldn’t resist leaning deeper into Mu Yuze’s embrace and took a deep whiff of his mate’s pheromones. If seven years ago, Mu Yuze’s pheromones were akin to an unripe fruit that was still wholly green, then now they were... rich, savory and mature. His Alpha kept sending the relentless signal that he should claim and mark his omega right here and now, but he promptly suppressed the impulse.

What the hell? He would not be so mindless to do that when all Mu Yuze did was—

A sudden realization struck him, freezing him in place. "Gege?" Mu Yuze asked in alarm upon sensing the change in his demeanor. "Are you still feeling unwell?"

He attempted to push He Juan away so that he could inspect the man’s condition better, but He Juan tightened his hold instead. "With him..." he began, his voice strained as if he was speaking through gritted teeth. "Have you done this with him too? Did you also release your pheromones so freely around him?"