Don’t Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin-Chapter 20 - Genius Cannonfodder's Counterattack Record (20)

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Chapter 20 - Genius Cannonfodder’s Counterattack Record (20)


translator: baumkuchen editors: serefina, glitterypanda


That morning, as Chi Xiaochi was eating breakfast, Yang Xiaoyan directly called him.


Seeing that Chi Xiaochi had no intention of answering the phone, Cheng Jian asked, “Who is it?”


Chi Xiaochi put the phone on mute and shoved it into his pajama pocket, “A real estate salesman.”


By the time he returned to his room to change clothes and took out his phone once more to check it, there were already tens of missed calls and messages.


“Xiao Cheng-ge, are you there?”


“Xiao Cheng-ge, pick up, please please pick up.”


“Only you can help me now, I shouldn’t have taken your things, I know my wrongs now, so can you forgive me just this once?”


Chi Xiaochi went into the cloakroom with his phone.


Other than having an utterly shitty taste in men, badly needing some Bendazac Lysine eye drops to clean out his eyes, Cheng Yuan actually had a quite artsy, hipster-y taste. His cloakroom was really well-stocked, and it wasn’t difficult to pick out an appropriate outfit.


As he picked out clothes from the wardrobe, Chi Xiaochi typed out a response to Yang Xiaoyan, “What you took wasn’t mine.”


Upon receiving Chi Xiaochi’s response, Yang Xiaoyan felt as if she’d hit the jackpot, and immediately called him.


Chi Xiaochi picked up. In an indifferent tone, he answered, “……It wasn’t convenient to answer the phone just now. What’s up.”


Hearing Cheng Yuan’s voice, a raging spark of hope was kindled in Yang Xiaoyan’s heart, “Xiao Cheng-ge, I know about what happened between you and my cousin now.……You two shouldn’t argue because of me. This was all my fault, and it had nothing to do with my cousin……”


Chi Xiaochi said, “You’re overthinking it. You’re not that important.”


Yang Xiaoyan choked on her words. Cautiously, she asked, “Xiao Cheng-ge, are you still angry with me?”


Chi Xiaochi turned the question back at her, “What should I be angry about?”


Feeling that Chi Xiaochi’s attitude wasn’t right, Yang Xiaoyan became even more panicked. With tears in her voice, she tried to defend herself, “I didn’t take it on purpose, I just liked it too much. I didn’t know you had taken someone else’s song……”


Chi Xiaochi calmly placed the outfit he’d chosen on the bed and went back in to pick a hat, “Your choice of words isn’t accurate. I took someone else’s songs to adapt them, while you took someone else’s songs to sell them. What I did was take, what you did was steal.”


Yang Xiaoyan couldn’t keep from sobbing and started to implore incessantly, “Xiao Cheng-ge, don’t be angry, let’s discuss this properly……”


Chi Xiaochi, “Why do you think I would be of any help to you? Right now, it’s Yundu that’s filing a lawsuit against you, not me.”


Yang Xiaoyan’s tears flooded down her face, “Xiao Cheng-ge, help plead my case with Yundu for me, even… even if you’re angry with me, you should at least care about the mutual affection between you and my cousin……”


In the time they had been talking, Chi Xiaochi had finished picking his clothing, socks and shoes.


He felt like there was no point in wasting any more time dealing with Yang Xiaoyan, and broke off her emotional plea, “Do you regret it?”


Yang Xiaoyan hurriedly nodded and expressed her wrongs, “Regret, I regret it.”


Chi Xiaochi’s sneer came through the receiver, making Yang Xiaoyan’s scalp turn cold.


“When the situation erupted, you first found Yang Baihua to talk to me, while you yourself hid in the back, unwilling to come out. Only when your futile attempt to cover the flames with a paper bag failed, did you come find me. ……Let me guess, is it that Yundu’s summons arrived, so you couldn’t sit still any longer?”


Yang Xiaoyan absolutely couldn’t bear to hear the word “summons” right now. She almost screamed out, “No! It’s not&#k2026;&#k2026;”


“You never tried to find Yundu, because you hoped that I would come out and negotiate with Yundu for you. When all is said and done, you still want to hide in the back and let someone else take care of everything for you. Your cousin said that you’re still young, but you’re really smooth at scheming.”


All her false pretenses had been torn off. Yang Xiaoyan was gaping and tongue-tied, her back feeling like it had exploded into an ant’s nest with bursts of stinging itches, and her joints were filled with cold sweat.


Chi Xiaochi made his judgement, “……You don’t really regret what you did. You only regret that you got caught.”


He hung up the phone and began to put on his clothes.


When two people grew up in different environments, their frame of mind and cognitive state would naturally be different when dealing with matters.


Yang Xiaoyan and Yang Baihua had grown up in a small social bubble. The people within the circle couldn’t avoid interacting with each other, and relationships were everything. If someone made some kind of request and the other person was unwilling or didn’t fulfill it, the prospect of receiving the label of “having no empathy” and “being unreasonable” was enough to pressure the other person into not being able to leave their house.


They had been educated in this way since they were young, so in their minds, “sentiment” and “duty” were one and the same.


Soon enough, the Yang Baihua with whom he “shared mutual affection” called, “Xiao Cheng, let’s talk.”


Chi Xiaochi said, “I have something on, you have three minutes.”


Yang Baihua said, hurt, “Xiao Cheng, don’t be like this.”


Chi Xiaochi tied up his necktie, “You have two minutes and forty-five seconds left.”


Realising Chi Xiaochi was serious, Yang Baihua didn’t dare to dawdle. After adjusting his mood, he persuaded patiently, “Xiaoyan is just a child and still a student. Isn’t she allowed to make mistakes? Everyone makes mistakes during their lifetime. Why should we beat them to death with a stick? If she really gets sued, what if the school holds her accountable and records her mistakes, or even expels her? Wouldn’t her life be over?”


Yang Baihua continued, “She likes music, just like you. Since she was young, she liked to take sticks and swish them around, saying she wanted to become a conductor in the future. Being able to make it into university here from where we were wasn’t easy for her, so if she doesn’t get a diploma, she’ll be brought back by her father to work at home. And when she comes of age, they’ll find someone for her to marry. She’ll be unable to return to the city forever and would never be able to achieve her dream. Xiao Cheng, you also like music, you should be able to understand her feelings, right?”


This spiel of Yang Baihua’s bemoaned the state of the universe and pitied that fate of mankind, making it incredibly confusing with its sophistry.


Even those on the same side as Chi Xiaochi, upon hearing his words, would inevitably be swayed.


After all, no one wanted to be a sinner who ruined someone’s life.


Yang Baihua waited for Cheng Yuan’s response.


He knew Cheng Yuan wasn’t a hard hearted person.


But what he didn’t know was that the soft hearted Cheng Yuan was no longer there. He had been indirectly stabbed with innumerable knives by this pair of cousins and left to bleed out for many years, eventually dying in depression.


So, the only thing Chi Xiaochi thought about this heartfelt speech was, what motherfucking kind of script from an eight season, Central China Television melodramatic drama was this?


Chi Xiaochi said, “Yang Baihua, you speak very well. But you’re talking to the wrong person.”


The moment he heard him say this, Yang Baihua’s hope-filled heart was like a balloon that had been poked with a needle and deflated.


Chi Xiaochi gave him a suggestion, “You guys should find Yundu’s legal department. Maybe they’ll be moved by your words and kindly agree to drop the case.”


Yang Baihua replied, disappointed, “Xiao Cheng, how did you become like this?”


Chi Xiaochi checked his watch, and, finding that it had just reached three minutes, promptly hung up.


Chi Xiaochi said, “Feels like I’ve really gone too far~”


061, “……” You clearly look delighted.


The regret level had risen, going straight over the fifty percent mark. Obviously, Chi Xiaochi was delighted.


He descended down the stairs just like this, his face full of that delight.


Cheng Jian had long since been waiting downstairs for him. He watched as his younger brother descended down the stairs step by step, the golden sunlight streaming through the window, falling on his body and illuminating his snow-white skin, giving it a slight glow.


When he first came home, Cheng Yuan had been shockingly thin. After been taken care of at home for so long, even though he hadn’t put on much meat on his bones, quite a bit of colour had returned to his face. Two days ago, he went to get a haircut and cleaned himself up to look young and fresh. On his body, the windbreaker paired with that shirt helped him shed off that young and inexperienced air of his, making his legs look longer and his waist look more slender. He walked down that flight of stairs like a model on a runway show.


Chi Xiaochi smiled, all bubbly, as he stood before Cheng Jian, “Ge, do I look handsome?”


Cheng Jian ruffled Chi Xiaochi’s hair, his movements as if he were stroking a golden retriever and making Chi Xiaochi stumble back and cry out, “Ge, my hair, my hair! It took me a lot of effort to get it like that……”


Cheng Jian inexplicably felt a hint of sourness in his heart. He commented bluntly, “Where did you learn to use hair gel? You look like a child pretending to be an adult.”


Chi Xiaochi grinned cheekily, “I stole yours.”


Cheng Jian motioned to hit him. Chi Xiaochi arched his back and quickly slipped out the door, complaining loudly, “Auntie Chen, look!! Look, my brother’s going to beat me up! Aren’t you going to do something!”


Auntie Chen, who was called out, just laughed, “I’m not going to do anything. Those who steal deserve to be beaten.”


Stealing needs to be punished. Even a woman who only had a junior high school education could understand this, but Yang Baihua, a student of great ability, couldn’t understand, and even tried to nag Chi Xiaochi ceaselessly.


On the way to Xingyun to record, he once again sent many messages, the general message still urging Chi Xiaochi to be kind, to reach out a helping hand, and to deliver all living creatures from suffering.


Out of boredom, Chi Xiaochi decided he might as well entertain himself by watching this marvelous play.


061 noticed that something wasn’t quite right, “He’s being too persistent. Who’s actually in the wrong in this matter is far too clear, he isn’t in the position to insist that you help.”


Chi Xiaochi lazily propped up his chin with a hand as he watched the trees along the streets speed past outside the window. He replied flatly, “Right, why is he being this persistent.”


061, “……Do you know something?”


Chi Xiaochi said, “Laoshi, I’m the one asking here.”


061, after a bit of brainstorming, immediately realised, “……Yang Xiaoyan holds information she can use against Yang Baihua. He needs to help Yang Xiaoyan suppress this issue, or else the moment that Yang Xiaoyan tells everything to her parents, she definitely will mention your existence. When that time comes, he won’t be able to hide the matter of him being gay anymore. He probably did try to find Yundu but was rejected at the door, so now he’s desperately trying to grab onto you, this life-saving straw.”


Chi Xiaochi started to heckle him by supremely enthusiastically and sarcastically flattering him, “Ohh, so it was actually like this, huh?”


061 couldn’t help but laugh, wanting to ruffle his hair like Cheng Jian had.


But this 0.25 kg beak of Yang Baihua’s, this 2 kg duck, really could quack.


Cheng Jian, who was in charge of driving, looked at Chi Xiaochi in the rearview mirror, “Your phone has buzzing throughout this entire journey.”


Chi Xiaochi replied naturally, “Since my last livestream, the staff of the livestream platform have been constantly contacting me, hoping for me to sign on with their platform.”


Cheng Jian, “Have you told this to Su Xiulun?”


Chi Xiaochi said obediently, “No. I don’t know anything about business contracts, so I didn’t sign. I just added the staff as a contact, and after I find out a little more, I’ll bring it up.”


Cheng Jian cast a glance at this younger brother of his, who’d grown up so much in the span of one night. He was really happy but still wanted to keep his aloof and cold image up, “Got it. Later, send me the contract so I can take a look.”


Chi Xiaochi, “En.”


While they were talking, another message from Yang Baihua arrived.


After watching the excitement for so long, Chi Xiaochi felt that leaving him hanging would be too mean and decided to reply to him just this once.


“I’ll trouble you to let her know that if she received a court summons, she should receive it on time, or else she’ll be considered to have given up her right to defend herself.”


This response seemed to have hurt Yang Baihua.


He fell into silence for a long time before asking, “……How do you expect Xiaoyan to live after this?”


Chi Xiaochi gently replied, “It’ll be fine. I believe that sooner or later, there’ll come a day when she’ll be able to walk out of the darkness. Those people on the internet don’t know the true story and are just talking nonsense. As long as she ignores what they are saying online, they can’t hurt her.”


This was what Yang Baihua had once said when Cheng Yuan had been caught in the plagiarism dispute. Today, Chi Xiaochi had revised it slightly before returning it with thanks.


Yang Baihua’s response already showed an obvious anger, “You say that really carefreely!”


Chi Xiaochi said, “Of course I’m carefree.”


Chi Xiaochi continued, “The one being sued isn’t me after all.”


After that, Yang Baihua didn’t send any more messages.


Because of his uneasiness, anger, and unwillingness, all kinds of emotions increased. By the time Chi Xiaochi arrived at Xingyun, Yang Baihua’s regret level had already broken past the big milestone of 60 points.


061 was actually really happy. After all, for the hosts he had before, the points would always increase excruciatingly slowly, point by point. In comparison, Chi Xiaochi had, at his best, generated nearly 50 regret points in a single day. The rate of increase was so fast, it had already broken every record 061 knew of.


061 said, “You’ve passed. ……Your teacher has decided to give hardworking students a little reward. What would you like?”


061’s voice, when filled with smiles, was really melodious. Even after being bound to 061 for so long, the moment Chi Xiaochi heard him speak, he still couldn’t help but want to recommend him to become a TV anchor.


He had reason to believe, even if 061 were to dub a loach, it would be an incredibly Mary Sue-ish loach.


Upon thinking of 009 who’d come to mooch food the other day, Chi Xiaochi suddenly had a thought, “……Let me see what you really look like then.”



sere: AAAAAAAA…x61 excitedddd


panda: Haaaaahhhhhhhh GASSSSSPPPPP!!!! I have a strange feeling that it will be avoided somehow