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Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World-Chapter 253 Florida Man Took Picture of a Cow on a Couch Surrounded by Five Black Horses. Tw*tter Exploded as Men Expressed Their Desire to Replace the Cow.
Chapter 253 Florida Man Took Picture of a Cow on a Couch Surrounded by Five Black Horses.? Tw*tter Exploded as Men Expressed Their Desire to Replace the Cow.
Chapter 253 – Florida Man Took Picture of a Cow on a Couch Surrounded by Five Black Horses.?Tw*tter Exploded as Men Expressed Their Desire to Replace the Cow.
"T-THE LEGENDARY COW LEVEL!"
Leo hysterically cackled like a madman, imagining himself engulfed by a horde of enraged humanoid cows wielding scythes and halberds. He eagerly anticipated the chaos and weirdness of the adventure.
The two structures appeared to be buildings but were, in fact, portals to another world. Leo was intrigued by these changes.
Eager to test the portals, Leo hurried to the platform. Upon arrival, he found Meowmeow, Lucky, and Mu-Nyang in their usual place. Meowmeow's attendants stood respectfully behind him as he was in the middle of recuperating from the previous skirmish.
Mu-Nyang exhibited a change in demeanor, closing his eyes in deep meditation, focused on internal digestion. Meanwhile, Lucky, true to his nature as a dog, wagged his tail and panted. His glittering eyes anticipated Leo's affection.
Following his encounter with Hua Taixu's original soul, Leo discerned a unique quality about these statues. They seemed to be clones of an exceptionally skilled expert.
"Whose clone are you, damn statues?" inquired Leo.
Lucky panted, responding earnestly, "Overlord Lucky, woof!"
Mu-Nyang cracked open his eyes slightly, offering cryptic insight. "My essence derives from Overlord Mustafa of the Cathulhu, munya."
Turning to Meowmeow, Leo sought an answer.
The black-winged angel replied promptly, "Overlord Mao Miaomiao, my lord."
"...As expected. And Kitten?"
Speaking on Aslan's behalf, Meowmeow replied, "Overlord Xiaomao."
"So, everyone here is a clone of a super expert. But why claim to be my shadows? How are you connected to me?"
Lucky panted as usual, yet he was the most forthright that day.
"You possess everyone's bloodline, woof!"
"Everybody's bloodline?!"
"You are also a... creation of those super experts, woof."
"…"
Leo paused to ponder. He remained silent for 30 minutes to digest the unexpected information.
What was he?
He knew about the cultivation ranks and Karma River. He was aware of how to use them and how they functioned as a whole. However, nobody had told him about his origins.
Then, Leo recalled a conversation when he secretly chatted with them regarding his origins and his power.
"Wait. That actually makes a lot of sense. You all mentioned the fate crystals before."
"Yes, woof! Initially, you were incomplete. But when your soul assimilated with the entity fate crystal left by your parents, you broke free from bloodline curses, woof! Doctor Mao Miaomiao might have taken your original body, but you're far stronger now, woof!"
Leo had heard similar details from the four guardian statues previously. Initially skeptical, he thought they emerged from the mysterious alien ring. Yet, as he learned more, he realized they might be sentient cancer cells that evolved independently from him.
Lucky intercepted Leo's thoughts.
"We're not precisely your cells, woof. We require your proximity. Otherwise, our power diminishes, and we fade, woof. Our existence is tied to your karmic river, woof!"
Upon Lucky's reminder, Leo noticed invisible strings linking the guardian statues to his dantian universe's karma river. He reached out, touching one.
The string connected Leo with Meowmeow. Upon contact, Leo could perceive Meowmeow's senses and glimpse a fragment of his memories.
The memory wasn't pleasant. It recounted Leo's struggles on Earth as an incomplete mutant facing tribulation lightning bolts. At that time, his cultivation was equivalent to a golden core cultivator about to reach the nascent soul rank in the Yan Dynasty's standards.
Upon reaching the nascent soul level, instead of awakening a nascent soul or dao avatar, Aslan, Meowmeow, Lucky, and Mu-Nyang emerged.
Each absorbed a different facet of Leo's bloodline, residing within him. However, none of them could emerged as the entity fate crystal suppressed their growth and tied them with Leo's soul.
The four resisted against the unknown force at first. But when they realized that their rapid growth rate might harm and destroy Leo's body prematurely, they stopped resisting.
Constant interaction with the crystal granted them knowledge of Leo's bloodline origins. They gradually assimilated the abilities and knowledge of their blood donors.
As Leo grew stronger, so did they. The four guardians copied a portion of the donors' power, reaching their strength but unable to exist independently. They remained a part of Leo, reliant on him.
Meowmeow was the most rebellious. After copying Doctor Mao's skills, he cultivated his dantian universe secretly while Leo was on Earth. He eventually selected three women to become his wives.
Afterward, the four awaited Leo's daily growth. As they had too much free time, they delved into Leo's fate and potential futures. Everyone got a glimpse of his future.
Meowmeow witnessed Leo marrying Esen and the tragedy. He also saw the event when Doctor Mao Miaomiao forcefully expelled Leo's soul before seizing his body.
Sensing he'd gathered enough, Leo paused Meowmeow's memory probe.
"Did any of you foresee my future?" Leo asked.
Mu-Nyang laughed, "Aside from the obvious, you'll adopt two daughters, munya. You know who they are, right, munya?"
"Within my domain?"
"Indeed."
"Who?"
"Young and talented individuals."
"…"
Leo ceased questioning Mu-Nyang. He got enough information, thus he refocused on his main goal.
DING
DING
Leo constructed the Portals to the Cow Level and Agriculture Realm beside the mystic realm's main portal device. The agriculture portal appeared as a barn door frame without an energy layer, akin to a crystal-clear HD monitor. The cow level's portal, a blue oval mana gate, emitted a buzzing hum.
Purposefully adjusting these portals, Leo tailored them to his immediate needs.
.
Portal to Cow Level (Level 17)
Number of Cows (x100) [10/25]
Quality of Cows [5/25]
Respawn Rate [1/25]
Portal Cooldown [1/25]
.
Portal to Agriculture Realm Level 17
Number of Farms (x100) [4/25]
Number of Fish Ponds (x100) [4/25]
Number of Pig Pens (x100) [5/25]
Number of Chicken Barns (x100) [4/25]
.
Leo visited the agricultural world first. Upon entering, his feet were stuck on the firm ground. The intense gravity force of this world made him weigh 50 times heavier.
The gravity of a planet unveiled many things about its qualities. For example, the Yan Dynasty Planet's gravity force was merely five times stronger than Earth's. Even so, the Yan Continent was already expansive and larger than every continent on Earth combined.
"A big world, I see."
Leo shifted his attention to the environment next.
The fresh scent of green grasses and clean air soothed him. The wide grassland, trees, and nature seduced Leo to sit down. He walked 10 steps and sat on a patch of short grasses, which seemed to have been cut recently.
A second later, his expression changed.
"Oh, crap!" 𝒻𝑟ℯℯ𝑤ℯ𝘣𝘯𝘰𝑣ℯ𝘭.𝑐𝘰𝓂
Leo almost jumped back out of the gate as he realized his mistake. He didn't wear a hazmat suit to protect the environment from his radiation contamination.
Despite touching the grasses with his bare hands, the green grasses never changed. Instead, Leo sensed the warm air produced by the grasses and trees. He narrowed his eyes and inspected them.
"Isn't this…"
The warm air was colorless and scentless. The fresh scent of the grasses was the disguise of the anomaly of this world.
The warm air was the purest yang Qi, similar to Leo's Qi and blood. It gave birth to life and it protected nature.
Leo was relieved to see his radiation neutralized by nature. At least, this world couldn't be contaminated if he accidentally touched any plant or tree.
Leo explored deeper into the world. He ascended 10,000 kilometers to the sky to scan the world from above.
He couldn't see any structure or animal. He could only see tall oak trees, flower patches, and endless grassland.
As Leo could see everything from this altitude, he decided to take a world tour. He observed which direction this planet rotated first. After making sure that it spanned anti-clockwise, Leo flew in the opposite direction.
After flying 10,000 kilometers east, Leo finally found what the system had built for him. There was a massive castle in the middle of farms, barns, and pig pens. The strange thing was, that everything was 50 times larger than a human's standard.
For example, the castle's brick walls were 500 meters tall and 150 meters thick. Each brick was three times larger than the pyramid's stone block, but they were much more durable and harder.
This aroused Leo's interest. Since this place had a strong gravity, everything in this world was forced to evolve to survive. He wondered how strong the tree of this world was.
'Can it be stronger than sacred wood?'
Leo wished to cut one of them down and brought it back for research. However, he was determined not to get sidetracked at the moment.
He gazed at the farms and counted them.
.
Several minutes later, Leo understood how this place worked. Every point allocated to an attribute increased the number of structures by 100 instead of one. Thus, 400 50-acre farms, 400 50-acre fish ponds, 500 gigantic pig pens, and 400 chicken barns extended around the castle.
Leo ascended and landed on top of the castle roof. Upon landing, the system informed him of the status of this place.
DING
.
Agriculture Realm (No Name)
Governor: None
Governor Effect: None
Primary Warehouse: Not Assigned
Crop Respawning Time: One Hour
Crop Mature Time: 24 Hours
Fish Respawning Time: One Hour
Fish Mature Time: 24 Hours
Pig Respawning Time: One Hour
Pig Mature Time: 24 Hours
Chicken Respawning Time: One Hour
Chicken Mature Time: 24 Hours
.
Looking at the menu, Leo was intrigued. He thought of the idle guardians and wondered which one he should assign here as a governor.
'I sent Kitten to Orlando because it has a lot of crocs and fish. Should I send him here instead? I don't think Meowmeow is into agriculture stuff. Lucky doesn't fit it. I doubt that the dog is only good at guarding, not managing. He is more of a fighter. As for Mu-Nyang, that guy is as obnoxious as Cat. Since he's an octopus cat, should he be more suitable for a swamp world like Orlando Realm? Alright, I've made up my mind. Kitten will be transferred here. As for that stupid cathulhu, he's gonna go hunt thunder caimans instead.'
Leo backtracked and exited the realm.
When Leo came out, he asked Mu-Nyang to replace Aslan's duty.
"Go and bring Kitten back. You will govern that caiman realm from now on."
Getting assigned a new task, Mu-Nyang was delighted, "Sweet, munya! Caiman buffet, munya!"
"HEY! Your job is to collect food, material, and lifespan from the monsters for me, not eating everything!"
It was too late for Leo to reprimand Mu-Nyang. The octopus cat disappeared into the permanent Orlando portal. An hour later, Aslan returned and sighed when he saw Leo's face.
"A new job?" Asked Aslan.
"Yeah, come with me to the new place. I need you to be this realm's governor and improve the quality of this agriculture world."
Aslan had no issue with that. Still, as Leo's father, he was concerned about the shortage of personnel. He knew that Leo would claim more worlds and realms in this universe, and he would soon lack trustworthy people to fill the governor positions.
"Master, if I may, may I suggest something?"
"Yes?"
"Some of your subordinates, such as Sierra, can be used as a workforce. By chance, if you manage to draw a clone of a talented person from the gacha, you can even send them to work as a governor. Since their existence is tied to you, they will never betray you."
"…I know that."
"Then, could I recommend Sierra to fill this position instead of me? If you upgrade her to a deity, her talents and other abilities will drastically increase. I'm a clone of a fisherman overlord, and I'm only good at fishing karma embryos in Karma River. Sierra's abilities in the agriculture field surpass mine."
"…"
It made sense. Leo totally forgot about the perverted cow woman.
As Leo agreed with Aslan's suggestion, he let the fisherman's clone guard the platform. He summoned Sierra instead.
.
.
An hour later, Sierra arrived on the platform. The first thing she requested Leo was predictable.
"Master, have you finally decided to milk me?"
Leo rolled his eyes, "I'm gonna upgrade you into a deity. Prepare yourself."
"Okay. But will you milk me? Or would you prefer to drink it from the source?"
"…"
Leo thought to himself. He wished to put Sierra alone on a couch surrounded by five nightmare horses in season one day. He bet that the VDO would be a hit and become the next hot meme on the internet.