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How To Survive as a Villain-Chapter 207: This Foreign Country Is Seeking Death, Why Don't We….
Chapter 207: This Foreign Country Is Seeking Death, Why Don’t We….
“What’s wrong, Xiao Jun Wang? Why are you frowning all the time?” After dinner, Tian Xiang saw that Xiao YuAn seemed distressed as he held his head in a daze, so she asked after cleaning up the dishes.
Xiao YuAn said: “I’ve angered His Majesty, and I’m trying to find a solution!”
Tian Xiang’s eyes widened: “There’s no way! His Majesty would come back every night to sleep with Xiao Jun Wang. His Majesty even changes your bandages himself, he doesn’t seem to be angry at all!”
Xiao YuAn: “…..When you say it like that, I suddenly realize something. How can my Yan-ge be so good?!”
Tian Xiang said: “Xiao Jun Wang, if you asked me how to coax a woman, I may be able to give you advice. But it’s hard to figure out what His Majesty is thinking. Why don’t you ask General Chen, who’s still digging the pond in front of the bedchamber?”
Xiao YuAn patted her head.
‘That’s right! How could I forget about Chen Ge!’
Chen Ge had been digging for a whole day, and he was finally able to take a rest. As soon as he sat down and drank a mouthful of cold water, a faint, ghostly voice suddenly came into his ears: “Where does a happy life come from? It depends on hard labor to exist!1”
Chen Ge spewed out the mouthful of water, almost choking to death.
Xiao YuAn kindly stretched out his hand and patted Chen Ge on the back to help him calm his breath: “Slow down, slow down, don’t rush.”
Chen Ge’s heart was wailing as he thought: ‘I’m not rushing! You scared the shit out of me!’
When Chen Ge finally calmed his breath, he exhaled softly, and asked: “What is Xiao Jun Wang doing here? Is your injury alright?”
“I’m fine. I just wanted to ask you something.” Xiao YuAn sat down next to Chen Ge, with a serious expression on his face: “How can I coax my sweetheart when he’s angry?”
Chen Ge gulped and asked: “It depends on what your sweetheart is angry about.”
Xiao YuAn said: “I promised him that I wouldn’t do anything stupid, but in the end…. But! The situation was critical at the time, so I didn’t have any other choice…. it’s just….”
Chen Ge nodded thoughtfully: “Then, did he argue with you?”
Xiao YuAn: “No, if he was willing to scold me, then maybe after scolding me, we could resolve our differences. But he’s so angry that he won’t even scold me.”
Chen Ge: “He must be extremely angry then.”
Xiao YuAn held his head in distress.
Chen Ge then said: “Xiao Jun Wang, don’t be upset. If you want to coax him, then why don’t you do something unexpected to surprise him?” Before, Xiao YuAn reassured himself that in order to coax Yan HeQing, he must lose face. But when Xiao YuAn sat on top of Yan HeQing, almost naked, he failed to seduce Yan HeQing. Could this be regarded as ‘something unexpected’?
Chen Ge seemed to see through Xiao YuAn’s thoughts, and said: “If not, then it must be because Xiao Jun Wang didn’t come up with the right idea. Think again, is there anything that he has been waiting for you to give him, but you didn’t?”
Xiao YuAn held his head and thought for a while. When suddenly, happiness struck his heart: “I understand!”
Chen Ge nodded with a naive smile, and said: “As long as Xiao Jun Wang understands. Wait, no! Xiao Jun Wang, because you haven’t been with His Majesty lately…. are you seeing someone else?! Xiao Jun Wang, I understand that you and His Majesty have a physical relationship with no feelings, but you can’t get in trouble at this time, ah! If His Majesty were to find out-! Ugh!”
Xiao YuAn picked up the water pouch, put it aside, and blocked Chen Ge’s mouth with his hand: “Are you really stupid or are you just a fool that seems wise?!”
…
At the same time, Yan HeQing was dealing with Court Affairs, when suddenly, a Minister hurriedly advised: “Your Majesty, the foreign country of the Western Regions sent a letter to us, saying that they heard that the Monarch of the Western Shu Kingdom has submitted to our country as a Minister. If we don’t send the Monarch of the Western Shu Kingdom back to the West, then they will send troops to harass our border cities.”
Yan HeQing’s hand, which was following the words on the memorials, suddenly stopped. As he slowly raised his head, there was a bottomless coldness in his eyes.
The Minister hadn’t realized that Yan HeQing’s expression was wrong, so he analyzed the situation in a methodical way: “Chen2 believes that the Monarch of the Western Shu Kingdom should be sent back to his country first. Your Majesty, this foreign country in the Western Regions is nomadic, reckless and belligerent in nature. If they harass our borders every day, the towns and people on the border will suffer bitterly. This foreign country has only coveted the land of the Western Shu Kingdom, they are worried about our country being on good terms with the Western Shu Kingdom, which is why they’re requesting such a thing. Why don’t we wait for these two countries to fight each other first? Like the oriole waiting in the back3, we’ll conquer the Western Shu Kingdom, unifying the whole country in one fell swoop!”
The Minister made a good analysis, so Yan HeQing didn’t criticize him too much. Still, he said coldly: “We’ll fight anyone who dares to approach my borders.”
The Minister was stunned: “Fight? With the foreign country of the Western Regions? But, Your Majesty, the Western Shu Kingdom is between us. If Your Majesty wants to fight, we can only take a detour. It’s too exhausting, and the soldiers will be too tired to fight. Besides, it’ll be hard to support the army’s food this way!”
Yan HeQing shook his head: “We won’t go around, we’ll go through the Western Shu Kingdom’s territory.”
The Minister said: “Your Majesty, Chen knows that you have always wanted to send troops to the Western Shu Kingdom, but if we conquer the Western Shu Kingdom at this moment, then the foreign country will become the oriole!”
Unexpectedly, Yan HeQing shook his head again, and said: “We’ll unite with the Western Shu Kingdom through marriage, and we’ll fight that foreign country.”
The Minister couldn’t believe his ears.
‘Union by marriage?!’
In the past, when the Western Shu Kingdom wanted to befriend the Southern Yan Kingdom, they sent several portraits of Princesses for Yan HeQing to choose as concubines. However, Yan HeQing burned every portrait, and became determined to attack the Western Shu Kingdom.
But now, Yan HeQing suddenly said that he wanted to marry! Which Princess does he like?! Hey! The Emperor can marry whoever he wants, but he kept saying that he wouldn’t get married over and over, right? Wait, it does seem like he can do whatever he wants, ah.
The Minister still wanted to ask which Princess caught his eye, but at that moment Yan HeQing suddenly got up: “I’ll retire in advance, I’ll announce it tomorrow.”
The Minister didn’t dare to say more, so he had to leave in a hurry as he secretly thought to himself: ‘I heard rumors that no matter how busy His Majesty was, he would always return to his bedchamber at night. Just now I saw it myself, it turned out to be the truth!’
It’s so cute that XYA is looking for ways to make YHQ less angry while YHQ is already organizing their wedding lmao (ノ´∀`*)
Can’t wait to see the Ministers’ reaction when YHQ announce that he’ll marry a man 😂😂 (like, why do you think he’s been single all these years to the point of burning the portraits of concubine candidates)
Footnotes
Lyrics from the nursery song《劳动最光荣》(láo dòng zuì guān gróng) “Labor is the most honorable thing”.臣 chén; State Official / Minister in Dynastic China. “I, your servant”, used when addressing oneself in front of the sovereign.The original sentence is “The mantis stalks the cicada, unaware the oriole is behind it”. It means that when considering problems and dealing with things, we should think carefully about the consequences, instead of focusing on immediate interests at the expense of future troubles. Here is used as a metaphor, “wait for the right opportunity to attack from behind”. From《说苑·正谏》by (刘向 liú xiàng) Liu Xiang [77-6 BC], from the Western Han Dynasty [206 BC-8 AD].