I Became the Villainess, But My Beast Husbands Can Hear My Mind?!-Chapter 53: Dragged Back to Life

"Because you really matter to me."

If Roxanna were being honest, those were the words she had wanted to hear back then—back when she was standing on the rooftop, when she wanted to end everything.

She had hoped that someone would run toward her, grab her, and beg her to step away from the edge.

[No one did that for me back then,] she thought bitterly. [But I won’t let my Calen go through the same thing.]

Cyrus and Luan, who were standing behind her, froze for a moment. They finally understood why Roxanna had once said that she had hurt herself in the past.

She had been suicidal. Maybe a part of her still was, but not as badly as before.

For her, physical pain had been the only way she knew how to drown out the pain inside her chest, the pain that was inflicted on her by others, or by herself.

So yes, she understood Calen, at least a little. She had also been someone who cried with no one there to hold her.

"Calen, I won’t force you to stay here!" she shouted again, her voice shaking. "If you want to leave, then you—"

"Don’t say that."

Luan suddenly grabbed her wrist, stopping her words. His grip wasn’t rough, but it was firm. "His old master used to say the same thing. If you talk like you’re ready to let him go, he’ll think you’re just like that person."

Roxanna pressed her lips into a thin line. She hadn’t expected her words—words that were meant to be gentle—to hurt him instead.

"Say something opposite," Luan said gently.

She took a deep breath and nodded. After thinking for a moment, she shouted again, almost in panic, "Calen, you’re not allowed to go anywhere, or I’ll break your legs!"

Wait, no!

That was too awful!

She didn’t even want to break anyone’s legs!

However, Luan and Cyrus didn’t say anything, which meant they didn’t think it was too much, when in truth, it really was too much!

Or... were beastkin simply used to breaking each other’s legs when joking? No, no, this wasn’t right. She needed better words.

"I’m not allowing you to leave!" Roxanna blurted out again after a second. "Because I like you—no, I care about you a lot!"

At that moment, Roxanna realized something painful: she was really bad at stopping someone from jumping off a cliff.

But maybe that was because she had once been the one standing at the edge, not the one trying to pull someone back.

Then suddenly, Calen turned around. His eyes were still empty, and his expression didn’t look like himself at all, but for the first time in a long while, he was finally looking at her.

Even so, Roxanna still couldn’t relax because he was standing at the edge of the cliff, and if she tried to grab him, he would probably fall straight down instead.

"Calen..." She carefully stepped forward, but not too close, so that Calen wouldn’t feel threatened.

"Are you telling the truth?"

Calen’s voice shook. It sounded like someone who had been drowning for too long, desperately hoping that someone would finally reach out and pull him back to the surface.

"Yes!" Roxanna answered right away, almost as desperate as him. "Calen, I didn’t release your crystal seal to test your loyalty or to hurt you!"

"Then why?"

Though faint, Roxanna could see that Calen was starting to clear his mind a little. The deep darkness in his golden eyes began to fade, and a faint light returned.

"Because I care about you." Roxanna softened her gaze and didn’t look away. "Because I know what it feels like to be trapped somewhere with no way out."

She swallowed and continued, "I know what it feels like to be chained. To be forced to stay in a place that scares you."

Roxanna knew what she was doing was dangerous.

By saying these things, she was telling her husbands that she wasn’t the evil Roxanna because that demon could never understand this kind of pain, and could never feel what they were feeling now.

She knew that maybe her husbands would see her as a dangerous mimic that needed to be eliminated, or worse, a demon beast they had accidentally brought back from the cursed forest.

She knew this conversation could cost her everything. If they decided to drive her out of the settlement, she would be alone again, and she probably wouldn’t survive for long.

But... that was alright.

These past few days had felt like heaven. After suffering for two years, at least she had been able to live comfortably, even if only for a short while, and she didn’t dare ask for too much.

[The universe never wanted me anyway,] Roxanna thought. [But at least I was able to feel their warmth for the past few days. That kind of gift is more than enough for me.]

"Calen, I promise... if you wait just a little longer, your life won’t be as painful as before." She finally extended her hand, like reaching out to a frightened dog.

The dog was big and looked scary, like it could bite anyone who came close, but it only bit because it was afraid.

The dog had grown used to being hit instead of being touched with kindness, so it never learned how to show its feelings the right way.

Now that someone suddenly reached out his hand without holding a wooden stick or chains, the dog became confused.

Calen was so confused that he suddenly regained his consciousness.

His golden eyes finally showed signs of life, and he widened his eyes when he realized that he was standing in a strange place.

"What?" Calen frowned, looking left and right. "Where am I?"

Without realizing it, he stepped backward, making Roxanna’s heart stop. "Calen, watch your ste—"

It was too late.

He didn’t watch his step and ended up falling straight off the cliff. Without thinking, or rather, as if her body moved on its own, Roxanna ran toward him and jumped after him.

"What are you doing?!" Calen reached out and grabbed her, holding her tightly while making sure his back would be the first to hit the hard ground.

Roxanna honestly didn’t know how they ended up in this situation, but at least neither of them fell alone.

If demon beasts were going to tear them apart, then at least they would face it together.

Both of them shut their eyes and held their breath, waiting for the pain, and waiting for their bodies to crash into the hard ground, but for some reason, it never came.

Instead, Calen’s back slammed into something soft.

"...Huh?"

"You’re finally awake?" Azul’s voice came from above.

Calen and Roxanna opened their eyes to see Azul looking down at them, shaking his head in disbelief. "Good thing there’s only one demon beast here," he added calmly.

Roxanna blinked, still wrapped in Calen’s arms, her heart pounding wildly. "What happened?"

She lifted her head, only to be greeted by something awful.

They hadn’t crashed onto hard ground at all because Azul and Zeir had killed a demon wolf... and were using its massive body as their landing cushion.

The demon wolf’s body wasn’t covered in blood because Zeir and Azul had beheaded it instead. However, it seemed to have been done quite roughly, because the cut wasn’t clean.

It looked like they had wrapped the demon wolf’s neck with hard roots, then pulled until its head was torn from its body.

Honestly, Roxanna was impressed by that, but at the same time, the scene was truly horrifying.

"Calen," Azul said while helping Roxanna down from the demon wolf’s body, his tone sharp but worried. "There were so many places you could’ve run to, and you chose this?"

He glanced at the cliff and shook his head. "You could’ve gone to the warm spring or anywhere else. But this..." He let out a breath. "Well, I’m just glad you’re alive."

"What?" Calen stared at him, disbelief written all over his face. "What did you just say?"

Azul frowned, clearly confused by his reaction. "What? I said I’m glad you’re alive."

Calen froze. For a second, he just stared at Azul, as if he couldn’t understand the words he had heard. "You are?" His voice came out low and rough.

Azul looked away, clearly uncomfortable. "Of course I am. Don’t make me repeat it."

Zeir frowned. "Calen, no one would be happy if you died. Not even Luan."

Calen’s hands trembled. He slowly lowered his head, his bangs falling over his eyes.

"I thought..." His voice broke. He swallowed hard. "I thought none of you would care if I disappeared."

For a moment, no one spoke.

Then Roxanna stepped forward and grabbed his hands tightly. "That’s not true," she said firmly. "You matter. To all of us."

Not long after that, Cyrus and Luan also came down from the cliff. Luan was able to jump from one rock to another in his cat form, while Cyrus transformed into his bird form.

As soon as Luan reached the ground, the first thing he did was smack the back of Calen’s head with his paw.