I PICKED UP A CHILD IN A DUMPSTER-Chapter 74: One Deep Breath.

Si Hon gripped the stick with both hands, knuckles turning white as if the poor piece of wood had personally offended him.

His breathing was uneven at first, shallow and sharp, but he forced it down— forced himself into stillness.

Then he inhaled, Slow, Deep. The air burned cold in his lungs.

Four translucent notifications blinked into existence beside him, hovering in the dim cave light.

「One-Breath Focus — Perfect concentration for one second」

「Calm Mind — Slight panic reduction」

「Stamina Flicker — Gain energy equal to one deep breath」

They shimmered insistently.

He ignored them.

His eyes fixed on the darkness deeper inside the cave— the true lair. The place that felt heavier. Colder. Hungrier.

He focused.

And then—

Zwooop.

The world loosened.

His body felt light, as if gravity had politely excused itself.

His mind cleared into something thin and sharp. He wasn’t standing anymore. He wasn’t stepping. He was simply... moving.

Space folded.

In a blink, he was no longer behind the cage hiding.

He was inside.

Deeper.

Much deeper.

He opened his mouth to scream— because obviously this was not part of the plan... but instead of being upside down, instead of being crushed or twisted or skewered by fate like usual.

He was upright.

Suspended.

In the air.

There was a brief, almost peaceful moment where he thought, Oh. Maybe this worked perfectly.

Then—

"Twack!"

He dropped like a sack of potatoes and slammed back-first into solid stone.

Air exploded from his lungs.

(Fuck, fuck— shit!)

The impact echoed through the cave.

And then—

"Thud."

A step.

Heavy.

Close.

(Shit! My tailbone hurts but fuck this shit!)

Another thud.

Something massive shifted its weight in the darkness.

Before panic could fully claw up his spine—

「Quick Get-Up」

His body moved before his brain finished swearing. He rolled, sprang up, and bolted silently toward a jagged stone formation nearby.

He slid behind it, pressing himself flat against the cold rock, heart trying to punch its way out of his ribs.

Thud.

Thud.

Thud.

The steps didn’t stop.

Each one deliberate. Slow. Curious.

Then—

Silence.

Si Hon swallowed.

Slowly— very slowly— he lifted his head and peeked over the edge of the stone.

Black fur.

Massive shoulders.

The distorted, hulking frame of the Black Munches.

Its head tilted slightly, sniffing.

"...Weird. Me hear something here fell," it muttered in its broken, gravelly voice.

It scratched its chin lazily with claws that could probably remove a limb like peeling a fruit. "Hmm... Me wonder what human behind cage are doing now..."

It snickered.

Actually snickered.

Then turned and lumbered away, heavy steps fading back into the deeper shadows.

Si Hon stayed frozen for three whole seconds.

Four.

Five.

Only when the sound fully disappeared did his body sag.

(Shit... It’s talking about me...)

His legs almost gave out from relief.

(Thank God. Thank God Mimi helped me...)

Slowly— carefully, he looked down at the ring on his finger.

The strange, slightly sticky, faintly Goo Ring that’s supposed to be glowing a random color is now just black.

It pulsed softly.

「아빠...?」

The small, innocent system voice echoed faintly in his mind.

His expression cracked.

Very gently, like a grown man who had absolutely no dignity left, Si Hon lifted his hand and pressed the ring against his cheek, rubbing his face against it shamelessly.

"Thank you so much, my lovely Han-Gyeol Mimi. ToT"

In the depths of a monster-infested lair, surrounded by death and darkness—

A grown man was affectionately nuzzling his magic goo ring.

And somehow...

It was the smartest decision he had made all day.

The ring pulsed warmly.

Then—

A tiny black window popped open in front of his nose.

It flickered twice.

Then sparkled.

「(｡•́︿•̀｡) 아빠 almost become floor pancake... Mimi heart go boom boom...」

A tiny chubby Mimi appeared, dramatically clutching her chest. Her glossy eyes trembled like she had just witnessed the fall of an empire.

Another window stacked on top of it immediately.

「(ง •̀_•́)ง BUT! Mimi strong! Mimi activate brain mode!」

The avatar put on comically oversized square glasses that slid down her tiny nose.

A miniature chalkboard appeared behind her with badly drawn cave diagrams and a stick figure labeled "파파, (fragile)."

She pointed at it with her glowing spoon.

「Monster distracted = 0.8 seconds safe. 아빠 breathe = skill combo. Mimi calculate!!!」

The chalkboard flipped.

Now it read in huge scribbles...

「아빠 NOT pancake. SUCCESS.」

Mimi threw both arms up in victory.

Confetti. For absolutely no reason. In a cave.

Si Hon blinked slowly.

"...You calculated that...? And how do you have so Many emotions... and faces?"

「(๑•̀ㅂ•́)و Mimi super support type! And Mimi just built different!」

"ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ..."

A blue familiar window appeared beside Si Hon’s face.

「ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ... what with this...」

"I don’t know..." Si Hon muttered automatically.

He had absolutely no idea he was responding to his actual system— and not the goo ring currently vibrating with misplaced confidence.

Mimi puffed up proudly.

Then her expression softened.

The glasses vanished.

The spoon lowered.

Her tiny round hands pressed against the window as if she could actually reach him.

「아빠 scared... but 아빠 move anyway... Mimi proud...」

The text wobbled slightly.

Not glitching.

Just... emotional.

Si Hon swallowed.

His back still hurt from the fall. His heart was still trying to claw its way out of his ribcage. The cave still smelled like damp stone and something metallic and wrong.

But the ring was warm.

And for a second—

He wasn’t alone.

"Oh... what does Mimi mean by’ I almost became a floor pancake?" he muttered.

Immediately—

「YES.」

The text enlarged aggressively.

A replay window popped up beside her.

It showed a chibi version of Si Hon teleporting majestically— Only to flop backward in slow motion.

"Twack~"

The chibi flattened into a dramatic starfish shape.

Mimi replayed it three times.

Si Hon stared.

"Wait... what? What’s this?"

The blue window popped up again.

「ಠ⁠,⁠_⁠｣⁠ಠ... yea... I can’t even do this... what’s this?」

「For analysis.」

A pause...

「...And little bit for comedy.」

She covered her mouth with her tiny hand.

Failed to suppress giggles.

「(≧▽≦)」

Si Hon on the other hand just stared at the floating window.

"You’re enjoying this too much."

Mimi straightened immediately.

Saluted with the spoon.

「No! Mimi serious guardian!」

She leaned closer, lowering her voice dramatically.

「But 파파 falling very funny.」

Silence.

Somewhere deeper in the cave, stone shifted again.

A low rumble rolled through the dark.

Si Hon’s shoulders tensed instantly.

Mimi’s expression snapped serious.

The cute effects disappeared.

And the blue window disappeared again.

Mimi spoon glowed brighter.

「아빠... Big one deeper inside. Bigger than entrance black monster.」

A tiny radar appeared behind her, blinking red farther into the cave.

Si Hon’s stomach dropped.

"...Of course there is."

Mimi puffed her cheeks.

「But 아빠 did good.」

"Yea, I know thank you."

Mimi leaned forward again, eyes soft now.

「아빠 heart loud. But 아빠 still move.」

The spoon gently tapped the glass.

「That is courage. Even if brain little broken.」

Si Hon immediately gasped softly.

"My brain is not broken...?!"

「Debatable.」

Another rumble echoed faintly.

Closer this time.

Mimi’s tiny form flickered slightly, conserving energy.

「아빠... listen.」

Her voice lost the playful tone.

「All-Directional Movement not only jump.」

Si Hon blinked.

She waved her spoon and a small 3D cube appeared, with arrows pointing in every direction.

Up.

Sideways.

Diagonal.

Backward.

「Not teleport. It reposition.」

She poked the cube.

「If 아빠 think of location clearly... body follow vector.」

He stared at her.

"...Vector?"

She pushed the oversized glasses back onto her face.

「Mimi read manual while 아빠 panic, and vector is a direction + a distance (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)」

Silence.

"Oh... Wait, what? There was a manual?" 𝕗𝚛𝚎𝚎𝐰𝗲𝗯𝗻𝚘𝚟𝚎𝗹.𝕔𝐨𝕞

「Yes.」

A one second pause.

"System."

The familiar blue window materialized beside Mimi’s floating projection with its usual unearned confidence.

「( ꈍᴗꈍ ) yo?」

"Fuck you."

A pause.

The emoticon flattened.

「ಠ_ಠ ...Alright. What is it. There is absolutely no way you summoned your primary operational interface just to verbally abuse it. I refuse to believe that is my purpose.」

Si Hon opened his mouth—

"It’s because of my s—"

The blue window flickered violently and expanded in size, cutting him off mid-syllable.

「Yes. I know. I KNOW. Don’t start. Apparently there was a manual. A manual. For a skill registered under MY system authority. And I was not informed. Do you understand how humiliating that is? I am the main system. The core. The administrator. The—」

It glitched for half a second.

「—the professionally certified guiding interface.」

"...You know?" Si Hon asked slowly.

The window froze.

「What do you mean, do I know? I’ve BEEN here. You’ve been talking to me this entire time. You literally just responded to me. Do you think I materialize for fun?」

Si Hon hesitated.

"...I thought I was talking to Mimi."

Silence.

Absolute.

System-wide.

Silence.

The blue window slowly rotated.

Very slowly.

Until it was facing Mimi’s projection.

The chubby avatar was adjusting her oversized glasses with scholarly pride, glowing spoon tucked under one arm like a war veteran.

The system zoomed in.

「And you.」

Mimi blinked.

「( •̀_•́ )?」

The window trembled.

「What are you.」

「Mimi is Mimi.」

「That is not an answer.」

「Support type. Built different.」

The system flickered harder.

「At first, I tolerated you. You were a minor visual anomaly. A decorative interface glitch. You displayed text. Fine. I also display text. We coexist.」

It expanded aggressively.

「But THIS?」

A tiny holographic replay of Mimi pushing imaginary glasses up appeared.

「You are issuing manual explanations. You are referencing documentation I DO NOT POSSESS.」

Mimi tilted her head.

「Mimi read manual while 아빠 panic.」

The blue window’s borders cracked with pixelated static.

Systemy: 「There. Is. No. Manual.」

Mimi:「There is. Page 3 say ’Reposition follow mental vector clarity.’」

Si Hon slowly turned toward the system.

"There’s a page three?"

The system glitched.

Hard.

A loading icon appeared.

Disappeared.

Reappeared upside down.

「...That is irrelevant.」

Mimi puffed her cheeks.

「System didn’t read fine print.」

The cave rumbled faintly in the distance, one of the Munches shifting its massive weight, but inside the cage, the real seismic event was happening between two floating UI elements.

The system lowered its opacity ominously.

「I am the primary authority. I handle stats. Titles. Skills. Cool poses sparkles! Actually I don’t do those... it’s automatic... anyway!」

Mimi interrupts raising her glowing spoon like a mic drop.

「Mimi handle survival.」

Si Hon looked between them.

One blue existentially threatened rectangle.

One chubby projection with a weaponized kitchen utensil.

"...Why are you two fighting?" he whispered hoarsely.

Both turned toward him at the same time.

「Because.」

「Because.」

They glared at each other.

The system’s text shrank to dangerously small font.

「Si Hon, You! Are MINE.」

Mimi’s cheeks puffed to maximum capacity.

「아빠 is Mimi’s.」

Si Hon felt something deep within his soul reconsider every life decision that led to this moment.

Behind them, three colossal monsters blocked the only exit.

And in front of him—

His system was in a territorial dispute with a sentient spoon-support projection.

"...I’m going to die," he muttered.

The system snapped back instantly.

「Incorrect. Survival probability currently 27%. Please focus.」

Mimi raised her spoon heroically.

「(๑•̀ㅂ•́)و Mimi increase to 28%!」

The system went silent.

"That’s... wew."

Mimi gasped.

The cave rumbled again.

Si Hon tightened his grip on the damp stick.

Somehow, impossibly— The monsters were not the most exhausting thing in the cave.

And that?

That was deeply concerning.