I'm Not Your Husband, You Evil Dragon!-Chapter 25: The Man Who Watched

Her attempt to say "accessories" sounded more like a jumble of words that only she could understand.

"Elena said that!" she insisted, stomping her foot. "Papa's ears are broken!"

I burst out laughing, ruffling her messy hair.

"Come on, you little chaos goblin. Let's make this quick."

Elena suddenly paused mid-sprint, her tiny brows scrunched together in serious toddler concern.

"Papa," she said, tugging on my sleeve, "where do we even buy school... acc-acc... accasahdfh?"

"Don't worry, my little goblin," I said with a grin, "I know a place where we can buy anything your chaotic little heart desires."

Elena tilted her head to the side, looking like she was trying to solve the world's biggest mystery.

"Where?"

"A shopping mall," I said, feeling a bit dramatic.

Both Erza and Elena stared at me, blinking in unison like I'd just said something from another planet.

"A shopping mall?" they echoed, their voices a mix of curiosity and surprise.

"Yep," I said, nodding enthusiastically. "It's a super market place where you can buy anything.

Toys, books, food, movies, jewelry... you name it."

Erza's eyes widened—just slightly—but for her, that was the equivalent of full-blown shock.

"Really?" she said, voice tinged with disbelief. "A place like that exists? How... strange."

I smirked, unable to resist. "Oh? The mighty Erza... intrigued by human innovation? Say it isn't so."

She shot me a glare sharp enough to cut steel, but the faintest flicker of curiosity still danced in her silver eyes.

"Don't be ridiculous," she said flatly, folding her arms. "It's not intrigue. I simply haven't seen much of your so-called technology. That's all."

The smile faded from my face for a moment.

"Well," I said, rubbing the back of my neck, "that's kinda my fault. Since I'm... not rich. Couldn't exactly take you on a tour of the finest parts of the human world."

My voice trailed off, quieter than I intended.

Erza's expression changed instantly—her usual cold mask melting away. And then—

SLAP!

It wasn't hard, but it caught me off guard. My head jerked slightly to the side.

"Idiot," she snapped, her voice laced with fire. "Do you think I'm here for your money? Do I look like some gold-digging merchant's daughter?!"

I stared at her, stunned.

"When," she said fiercely, "have I ever blamed you for anything you couldn't give me? Don't insult me—or yourself—like that again."

I blinked, swallowing hard. "I didn't mean it like—"

She cut me off. "I chose you, you fool. Not your wealth. Not your world. You."

There was silence.

Then I sighed, looking at the ground. "I just... wish I could give you more. Show you more."

She exhaled sharply and looked away, her voice quiet now. "Tch. Always blaming yourself. Typical human nonsense."

I forced a chuckle. "Well, if you haven't noticed, this world kind of runs on nonsense. And money. Mostly money."

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She glanced back at me, her tone dry. "Yes. I'm starting to realize that in this world, strength isn't power—currency is."

"Exactly," I muttered. "That's the rule here."

She scoffed, her voice bitter. "Humans and their greed. Always chasing something—more gold, more things, more... everything."

There was a beat of silence.

Then she added, almost too quietly, "But... not you."

That made me look up.

Her eyes met mine—cool, steady, but filled with something raw beneath the surface.

"You're the only idiot who gave me everything... without having much at all."

I was overwhelmed.

Everything she said—it hit me harder than any punch she'd ever thrown. And for once, I couldn't hide behind jokes or smirks.

I grabbed her hand, gripping it tight like I was holding on to something sacred.

"Erza..." I said, voice cracking with emotion. "My queen... I'm sorry."

Her brows arched slightly. Surprised.

"I always tease you. I act like you're just here to make life difficult. Like you're some beautiful, terrifying storm I never asked for..."

She blinked, stunned by my sudden honesty.

"...But I was a fool."

Her lips parted slightly. A faint pink bloomed across her pale cheeks. She looked at me like she didn't recognize me—like she was seeing something fragile behind the usual sarcastic mask.

And for just one breathless second... I thought she might lean closer.

Then—

BAM!

Her fist rocketed into my head with the force of a divine judgment.

I didn't even get a word out.

THUD.

Flat on the floor. Stars in my eyes. Heart still bleeding sincerity.

She stood above me, arms crossed, clearly flustered but hiding it behind her usual icy tone.

"Tch. Don't be ridiculous," she muttered, spinning on her heel. "We don't have time for this drama. I'll be ready in ten minutes."

And just like that, she was gone.

I lay there, completely knocked out, still processing what just happened.

That's when tiny footsteps pattered in.

"Papa?" Elena peeked over my collapsed body, rubbing her eyes. "Are you okay? Are you... dead?"

I groaned. "No... just emotionally injured. Very deeply."

Elena blinked down at me, serious as ever. "Did Mama punch you because you were being Weird again?"

"...Yes."

She nodded. "You should stop doing that. It's not safe."

Meanwhile, inside the bedroom...

Erza stood in front of the mirror, her hand clamped over her mouth, cheeks glowing like fire.

"That face..." she muttered, flustered beyond reason. "That dumb crying face. Why is it so stupidly cute?!"

She growled at her reflection.

"Idiot mortal! Saying things like that... calling me his queen... like he actually means it!"

Her fingers curled into fists as she paced.

"And that stupid line! 'I was a fool.' Ugh! You are a fool mortal!"

She stopped, her voice dropping to a whisper as she glanced toward the door.

"...But you're my fool."

Then she caught herself, cheeks going full crimson.

"I—I should punch him again for making me feel this way!"

Uff....

An hour had passed. An entire hour.

I was still sitting in my blue, second-hand car that rattled every time I tapped the brakes. The paint was faded, the radio only spoke in static, and the seatbelt clicked in with a prayer.

"Elena!" I yelled, leaning half out the window, "What's taking you so long? We said ten minutes!"

From the third-floor balcony, her voice rang out like it was a school play. "Papa! Mama's just locking the door! We're coming! Wait right there!"

As if I had anywhere else to be. I sighed, but when I saw them both coming down the stairs, I couldn't help but smile. I was genuinely excited for this trip. More than anything, I was looking forward to their reactions once we reached our destination.

Elena hopped into the front seat with her usual sparkle.

Erza, on the other hand, slid into the back like royalty boarding a chariot. She crossed her legs with dramatic flair and declared, "You mortals may now proceed."

I didn't even flinch. This was normal.

Elena clapped her hands. "We're going shopping! To the mall!"

Erza scoffed as if Elena had said they were visiting a pigsty. "Honestly, shut up, Elena. It's just a commercial structure. Don't act like a peasant seeing fire for the first time."

I groaned. "Uff. Here we go with the royalty drama again."

Erza's glare could have started a wildfire.

"Right," I said, shifting gears. "Let's just... go."

"Hoho! Brum brum!" Elena giggled, mimicking the car sounds as if I hadn't already started the engine. The joy was contagious. I grinned.

We hit the highway, and I made sure to avoid any roads near campus. I was skipping college today—and if my professor saw me? Well, let's just say I'd need a will.

As we drove, both girls stared out the window like tourists on another planet. Glass towers, overpasses, the metro—everything fascinated them.

"Papa! Look! A metal anaconda!" Elena pointed to the train zooming above us on the tracks.

Erza leaned forward. "Yes... some kind of human technology. What is that thing?"

A golden opportunity. I turned with a straight face.

"My Queen," I said, "that is a Steel Serpent. It carries humans inside its belly."

Erza blinked. "Wait... seriously?"

I barely made it five seconds before I burst out laughing. "You actually believed that?"

Silence.

The temperature in the car dropped like someone had turned on a ghost.

I froze. "Oh no," I muttered. "Why does my mouth always choose violence?"

We finally reached the mall. Erza stepped out with icy grace, arms folded like a judge ready to deliver a life sentence.

"Don't you ever try to deceive me again," she said.

I raised my hands. "Yes, yes—my bad, my Queen."

I swear, if she hits me one more time, I'm going to crush this car into a vending machine.

"Ouch! My head!" I winced as Erza smacked me again—this time with the kind of force that made birds consider migrating early.

"What are you doing?" I groaned. "Let's just go already!"

We finally parked, and the three of us headed toward the shopping mall entrance. I took a deep breath. The sun was shining, the weekend crowd was buzzing, and for once, everything felt... right.

Elena walked in the middle, gripping my hand like a kid on a class trip.

Erza followed behind us with her usual "I'm not emotionally attached but secretly am" face.

From the outside, we probably looked like the ideal family.

I smiled without meaning to. "Man... I love my life."

But somewhere nearby—

An old man stood quietly behind a tinted glass window on the upper floor of the mall. He wore round, silver-framed goggles and a long coat that whispered in the breeze.

He was watching us.

A faint smile tugged at his lips.

"Head Master," a security guard approached. "Is something wrong?"

The old man didn't answer at first. His eyes were still on us—on Elena's laughter, Erza's distant gaze, my dumb grin.

Finally, he spoke, voice low and distant.

"...It's been a while since I've seen a happy family like that."

He let the words hang for a moment before continuing.

"They remind me of something I lost long ago... What a strange, strange little family I've met today."

He turned slowly, disappearing into the shadows of the hall.

To be continued...

[End of Chapter]

[Special Thanks from the Chaos Family]

Elena: Hiiiiiii, everyone~!

Guess what?! We hit 200 collections! Elena jumps with joy and throws invisible sparkles Thank you, thank you! Elena is sooo happy! Winks with both eyes

Yuuta: Wow... Just 19 days? That's insane. I thought I was the only one who liked this chaos. Guess not!

Grins You guys are incredible. Seriously, thank you!

Erza: Flips hair coldly Hmph. Obviously... it's because of my unmatched beauty. The story is just... background music fades into dramatic silence an extra.

Yuuta: Chuckles Oh come on, Miss Ice Queen. Did you forget you're No. 3 in the fandom ranking? People clearly love your frozen attitude.

Erza: Eyes glowing blue Yuuta... come here. I swear, I'll freeze your annoying tongue and shatter it into glittering ice dust.

Yuuta: Backs away quickly I-I was just joking! Calm down, Elsa—I mean, Erza!

Elena: Sighs like a tired mom Ugh... Mama and Papa are fighting again. Anyway! Thank you so much, lovely readers! You're the best! Throws air kisses

Okay byeeee~ Love you lots!

Yuuta & Elena: BYE-BYE!!