Kantan na Monitor desu-A Certain Voice Mail Message

“You have one message.”

Hey, hey, onii-chan. It’s me.

Leaving a message makes me nervous for some reason. It’s weird how different it is not having someone to talk to.

Well, that doesn’t matter.

I hear you’ve gotten yourself involved in something dangerous again, but try not to do that too much.

Do you not think you’re involved in anything dangerous?

C’mon now. The dangers that you can tell are dangerous are third rate at best. The truly dangerous things don’t even look dangerous, so they’re a real pain to deal with.

And they’re often located quite nearby.

For example, have you heard the story of “the person on the phone”?

Someone is talking to their lover over the phone, but their lover seems to be acting weird. Well, there are a lot of different variations on the story, but it always turns out the person was speaking with someone dangerous instead of their lover. Some versions have the person realize it and save them while others have them not realize it and not save them.

That is where the true dangers lie.

They are guaranteed to be safe, but then they overturn that assumption.

You run across that kind of thing sometimes, so be careful.

...Hm?

I wonder if talking about that will make you stop trusting this message of mine? 𝑓𝔯𝑒e𝘸e𝘣𝓷𝘰ѵe𝚕.c૦𝙢

That would make me sad...is what you want to hear, right? Well, that’s not the type of person I am.

But...

There might be a danger of people wanting to reach me using your phone and pretending to be you.

Bye, onii-chan.

Having a girl who is not related to you in the slightest call you that is one of the more enjoyable examples of the absurd, so make sure you don’t give up at that early stage.