Reincarnated as a Mushroom?-Chapter 55 - 54: A Garden for the Warborn, a Reward for the Faithful

Chapter 55: Chapter 54: A Garden for the Warborn, a Reward for the Faithful

Chapter 54: A Garden for the Warborn, a Reward for the Faithful

Six hours passed in a trance beneath the brooding shadow of my Origin, and with each breathless minute I could feel something sacred threading itself back into the tapestry of my soul. I would love to lie and say the experience was peaceful, meditative—something out of an old monk’s dream journal. But no, it was fucking euphoric. Like a full-body orgasm every ten to fifteen minutes without reprieve. A spiritual climax with no refractory period.

And then, without ceremony or cosmic fanfare, it happened.

Wholeness.

Not a dramatic power spike. Not a crackling surge of energy or a sudden vision of floating above the universe’s titty-shaped secrets. Just... completeness. Like I had been a puzzle with one crucial bastard of a piece missing under the couch, and someone finally found it with a vacuum hose.

A smile crept onto my face, slow and reverent, when I realized I could once again feel my psionic energy with the kind of crystalline clarity I hadn’t even realized I missed. With a twitch of thought, I summoned that sweet silvery pressure around my body and fired off a compact psionic bullet from my hand—just a flicker, a pebble, but fuck, it felt like birthing divinity.

I was so moved by the sensation I forgot how to breathe.

Wait. No, seriously—why can’t I breathe?

Panic crawled up my spine like a centipede dipped in ice water. I reached up and discovered something warm, soft, and distinctly not air was suffocating my entire face. Great. Of all the ways to die in this hellhive, I was about to go out face-first in someone’s crotch. Classic.

With my now-restored soul pumping pure juice into my psionic arsenal, I gathered a full-body charge of gyrokinesis and prepared to launch whatever depraved entity was using my nose as a saddle horn.

---

Meanwhile, just outside my imminent murder-by-snatch:

"That’s all there was to it, Kimchi. He just wouldn’t wake up," Crystal lied with the calm of a career criminal. "I scanned his brain and his vitals—he was healthy. So I assumed, graciously, that he was letting me feast. Obviously."

Kimchi’s brows furrowed. Not in moral disapproval—she didn’t care that Crystal had gone full goblin on my unconscious junk again—but rather in frustration. She had been hoping for some arcane technique. A cheat code. A loophole in my sixth-sense defense grid. Instead, Crystal had just... brute-forced it. She was halfway through daydreaming about her next chance to "accidentally" get a taste when—

BOOM.

Kimchi was shot 100 meters into the fucking ceiling like a rocket-propelled thigh cannonball.

---

"Gaaasp—hrrgh, hack—what the fuck, Kimchi?! Were you trying to kill me?!"

I bolted upright, clutching my chest like a damsel in a bad romance drama. My vision was filled with glossy purple-white exoskeleton, and my mouth still tasted like emotional confusion and thigh sweat. Fantastic.

Kimchi descended from her impromptu flight via my psionic launch, and I caught her in a princess carry purely out of reflex. I placed her down gently and gave her the look of a man betrayed by thighs he once loved.

She blinked at me, completely unbothered, rubbing her head with both hands. "Why would Kimchi ever wish harm upon her beloved Irvine? Kimchi remembers no action that would suggest such intent."

I inhaled through my nose. Bad move. There was still a scent clinging to me. "Okay. Let’s walk through this together. You were sitting on my face. Grinding on my face. Your lower body was moonlighting as a sleep paralysis demon. Now I know I’ve said, more than once, that suffocating between your thighs might be the ideal way to die... but I didn’t mean tonight."

Her brows scrunched. Then her mouth made an "O" of horrified epiphany.

’Yup,’ I thought, ’She didn’t mean to.’

It turns out, during her conversation with Crystal, Kimchi had absentmindedly shifted positions. And since her entire lower region was armored, she hadn’t noticed that she’d parked the honey churner directly over my mouth like it was the last docking port on a pleasure cruiser.

She opened her mouth to apologize, but I raised a hand.

"It’s fine. I believe you. But tell me this: why were you on top of me while I was sleeping?"

Kimchi flicked a nervous glance toward Crystal, unknowingly ratting out her Queen with the speed of a guilty toddler pointing at a broken lamp.

"Crystal?"

Her silence was pregnant. Not with twins. With guilt.

If Crystal had eyes, they’d be darting around the room like a shifty raccoon. She knew there was no escaping this one. No external psychic influence, no deranged mutation driving her this time. Just pure, unfiltered, unholy lust.

So, she confessed.

Everything.

Every stolen moment. Every manipulated hormone. Every calculated ’treat’ she took from my sleeping form. Kimchi was absolutely floored—like, visibly staggered—by the part where her Queen had lied to her outright just to engineer more alone time with my unconscious body.

By the time Crystal got to the taste notes of each sample, I had emotionally exited my own skull.

Still, I wasn’t angry. Not truly. Ever since I climbed out of that regeneration tank this morning—or evening, time was a joke—I’d understood the temptation. Desire was in the air like spice, like pollen, like psionic aphrodisiac dust. But rules were rules.

With a mere thought, I summoned the Terror of the Hive from across the room.

The Stick.

No trial this time. No pardon.

Twenty-seven solid bonks. One for every ejaculatory crime committed.

Crystal—now dazed and thoroughly bonked—was scooped up and lovingly deposited beneath my vibrating bed bug. I kissed her on the lips, just once, to let her know that yes, I still adored her. Even if she was a sexual criminal with the moral compass of a horny black hole.

Then, turning toward the now-slumped Kimchi, I extended my hand.

"Come on," I said.

She looked up at me, puzzled. "Where are you taking me, my love?"

I didn’t look back. The Queen’s Guards were glaring at me again, probably wondering if I’d finally lost control of my harem. "You nearly smothered me to death, sure. But you also protected me from Crystal’s antics and carried out the task she assigned. That makes you a good girl."

Kimchi’s ears twitched. Her eyes dilated like a cat staring down a laser pointer. She didn’t ask what kind of reward was coming.

She didn’t care.

Good girls got good things.

I led her to the training room—the one she had supposedly customized. As we rounded the corner and stepped inside, I froze.

Completely.

Slack-jawed.

Two full minutes passed before I could string a sentence together.

"O–Orchid... are you fucking serious?"

Kimchi blushed. "Do you like it, my love? Orchid was unsure if her love would truly desire such a gift, but Orchid gave it her all."

What she had built, in just six hours with the help of tens of thousands of drones, was not a training arena.

It was Eden.

A perfect replica of the Ker’min waterfall glade—my favorite spot from that ruined, conquered planet. Every detail was there: the cascading dual waterfalls, the verdant foliage thick with alien song, the pair of shimmering plunge pools, even the temperature was correct. And somehow, impossibly, she had manufactured a breeze—a whispering wind that sang through the leaves like the planet still lived.

I stepped forward, felt the kiss of soft earth beneath my feet, inhaled air that smelled like nostalgia and rain.

I turned to her, kissed her deeply, possessively. My hands trailed down her back, gripped the curves of her hips, and lifted her into my arms. She wrapped her legs around my waist without hesitation, her body singing in time with mine.

"I love it," I whispered against her lips. "And I love you."

We locked eyes.

For a heartbeat, the world shrank to two souls reflecting each other—no psionic link required. Just skin and breath and silent adoration. The window to her soul was wide open, and I saw only longing, loyalty, and joy.

Still carrying her, I struggled out of my sleeping garb. With her legs tight around me, I waded into the lower of the two pools, water lapping at my thighs.

It was time to show her exactly how good girls are rewarded. freēwēbηovel.c૦m

---Chapter 54: A Garden for the Warborn, a Reward for the Faithful

Six hours passed in a trance beneath the brooding shadow of my Origin, and with each breathless minute I could feel something sacred threading itself back into the tapestry of my soul. I would love to lie and say the experience was peaceful, meditative—something out of an old monk’s dream journal. But no, it was fucking euphoric. Like a full-body orgasm every ten to fifteen minutes without reprieve. A spiritual climax with no refractory period.

And then, without ceremony or cosmic fanfare, it happened.

Wholeness.

Not a dramatic power spike. Not a crackling surge of energy or a sudden vision of floating above the universe’s titty-shaped secrets. Just... completeness. Like I had been a puzzle with one crucial bastard of a piece missing under the couch, and someone finally found it with a vacuum hose.

A smile crept onto my face, slow and reverent, when I realized I could once again feel my psionic energy with the kind of crystalline clarity I hadn’t even realized I missed. With a twitch of thought, I summoned that sweet silvery pressure around my body and fired off a compact psionic bullet from my hand—just a flicker, a pebble, but fuck, it felt like birthing divinity.

I was so moved by the sensation I forgot how to breathe.

Wait. No, seriously—why can’t I breathe?

Panic crawled up my spine like a centipede dipped in ice water. I reached up and discovered something warm, soft, and distinctly not air was suffocating my entire face. Great. Of all the ways to die in this hellhive, I was about to go out face-first in someone’s crotch. Classic.

With my now-restored soul pumping pure juice into my psionic arsenal, I gathered a full-body charge of gyrokinesis and prepared to launch whatever depraved entity was using my nose as a saddle horn.

---

Meanwhile, just outside my imminent murder-by-snatch:

"That’s all there was to it, Kimchi. He just wouldn’t wake up," Crystal lied with the calm of a career criminal. "I scanned his brain and his vitals—he was healthy. So I assumed, graciously, that he was letting me feast. Obviously."

Kimchi’s brows furrowed. Not in moral disapproval—she didn’t care that Crystal had gone full goblin on my unconscious junk again—but rather in frustration. She had been hoping for some arcane technique. A cheat code. A loophole in my sixth-sense defense grid. Instead, Crystal had just... brute-forced it. She was halfway through daydreaming about her next chance to "accidentally" get a taste when—

BOOM.

Kimchi was shot 100 meters into the fucking ceiling like a rocket-propelled thigh cannonball.

---

"Gaaasp—hrrgh, hack—what the fuck, Kimchi?! Were you trying to kill me?!"

I bolted upright, clutching my chest like a damsel in a bad romance drama. My vision was filled with glossy purple-white exoskeleton, and my mouth still tasted like emotional confusion and thigh sweat. Fantastic.

Kimchi descended from her impromptu flight via my psionic launch, and I caught her in a princess carry purely out of reflex. I placed her down gently and gave her the look of a man betrayed by thighs he once loved.

She blinked at me, completely unbothered, rubbing her head with both hands. "Why would Kimchi ever wish harm upon her beloved Irvine? Kimchi remembers no action that would suggest such intent."

I inhaled through my nose. Bad move. There was still a scent clinging to me. "Okay. Let’s walk through this together. You were sitting on my face. Grinding on my face. Your lower body was moonlighting as a sleep paralysis demon. Now I know I’ve said, more than once, that suffocating between your thighs might be the ideal way to die... but I didn’t mean tonight."

Her brows scrunched. Then her mouth made an "O" of horrified epiphany.

’Yup,’ I thought, ’She didn’t mean to.’

It turns out, during her conversation with Crystal, Kimchi had absentmindedly shifted positions. And since her entire lower region was armored, she hadn’t noticed that she’d parked the honey churner directly over my mouth like it was the last docking port on a pleasure cruiser.

She opened her mouth to apologize, but I raised a hand.

"It’s fine. I believe you. But tell me this: why were you on top of me while I was sleeping?"

Kimchi flicked a nervous glance toward Crystal, unknowingly ratting out her Queen with the speed of a guilty toddler pointing at a broken lamp.

"Crystal?"

Her silence was pregnant. Not with twins. With guilt.

If Crystal had eyes, they’d be darting around the room like a shifty raccoon. She knew there was no escaping this one. No external psychic influence, no deranged mutation driving her this time. Just pure, unfiltered, unholy lust.

So, she confessed.

Everything.

Every stolen moment. Every manipulated hormone. Every calculated ’treat’ she took from my sleeping form. Kimchi was absolutely floored—like, visibly staggered—by the part where her Queen had lied to her outright just to engineer more alone time with my unconscious body.

By the time Crystal got to the taste notes of each sample, I had emotionally exited my own skull.

Still, I wasn’t angry. Not truly. Ever since I climbed out of that regeneration tank this morning—or evening, time was a joke—I’d understood the temptation. Desire was in the air like spice, like pollen, like psionic aphrodisiac dust. But rules were rules.

With a mere thought, I summoned the Terror of the Hive from across the room.

The Stick.

No trial this time. No pardon.

Twenty-seven solid bonks. One for every ejaculatory crime committed.

Crystal—now dazed and thoroughly bonked—was scooped up and lovingly deposited beneath my vibrating bed bug. I kissed her on the lips, just once, to let her know that yes, I still adored her. Even if she was a sexual criminal with the moral compass of a horny black hole.

Then, turning toward the now-slumped Kimchi, I extended my hand.

"Come on," I said.

She looked up at me, puzzled. "Where are you taking me, my love?"

I didn’t look back. The Queen’s Guards were glaring at me again, probably wondering if I’d finally lost control of my harem. "You nearly smothered me to death, sure. But you also protected me from Crystal’s antics and carried out the task she assigned. That makes you a good girl."

Kimchi’s ears twitched. Her eyes dilated like a cat staring down a laser pointer. She didn’t ask what kind of reward was coming.

She didn’t care.

Good girls got good things.

I led her to the training room—the one she had supposedly customized. As we rounded the corner and stepped inside, I froze.

Completely.

Slack-jawed.

Two full minutes passed before I could string a sentence together.

"O–Orchid... are you fucking serious?"

Kimchi blushed. "Do you like it, my love? Orchid was unsure if her love would truly desire such a gift, but Orchid gave it her all."

What she had built, in just six hours with the help of tens of thousands of drones, was not a training arena.

It was Eden.

A perfect replica of the Ker’min waterfall glade—my favorite spot from that ruined, conquered planet. Every detail was there: the cascading dual waterfalls, the verdant foliage thick with alien song, the pair of shimmering plunge pools, even the temperature was correct. And somehow, impossibly, she had manufactured a breeze—a whispering wind that sang through the leaves like the planet still lived.

I stepped forward, felt the kiss of soft earth beneath my feet, inhaled air that smelled like nostalgia and rain.

I turned to her, kissed her deeply, possessively. My hands trailed down her back, gripped the curves of her hips, and lifted her into my arms. She wrapped her legs around my waist without hesitation, her body singing in time with mine.

"I love it," I whispered against her lips. "And I love you."

We locked eyes.

For a heartbeat, the world shrank to two souls reflecting each other—no psionic link required. Just skin and breath and silent adoration. The window to her soul was wide open, and I saw only longing, loyalty, and joy.

Still carrying her, I struggled out of my sleeping garb. With her legs tight around me, I waded into the lower of the two pools, water lapping at my thighs.

It was time to show her exactly how good girls are rewarded.

---

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