I couldn’t keep going like that, so I retreated to my private room, the one connected to my office, and shut the world out.

Tomorrow... I’d do it.

Tomorrow, I’d be the one to carve into my own chest and rip something out of it. I’d stand there and hurt the woman I’d loved for years, tear her down in front of everyone, and still call it necessary.

For the better. For all of us.

That’s what I told myself as I lay there, staring into the dark, forcing my eyes shut like I could bury the doubt along with it.

—

After a sleepless night...

I’m standing at the altar.

Waiting.

The entire hall is packed, eyes everywhere, whispers barely contained, cameras ready. I arranged this. Every single detail. Made sure there’d be no escape, no way to soften what was about to happen.

And still... I can’t keep still.

My fingers twitch at my sides. My jaw’s locked so tight it aches. There’s this restless energy crawling under my skin, making it hard to even breathe properly. I don’t know if it’s nerves or something worse.

Am I nervous because I’m about to ruin her?

Because I’m about to drag her name through the dirt, break her in front of the media, my parents... her former parents... everyone who ever looked at her like she mattered?

...Maybe.

Or maybe it’s something else.

Because beneath all that tension, there’s something uglier.

Anticipation.

Hope.

It scratches at my chest like claws, relentless and irritating, like something inside me is waiting for her to walk through those doors. Waiting to see her. To confirm she’s really there.

And I hate that I can’t tell if I’m waiting to destroy her, or if some part of me is still hoping she’ll look at me... and make me stop.

Some might call me a coward or someone who wanted to have his cake and eat it too, but I don’t know.

All I can think about right now is Ashley.

What she’ll look like when she walks in... in that wedding dress she used to talk about like it was sacred. She always said she wanted it simple and elegant, something she’d wear when we stood side by side, mated, married, in front of everyone who mattered.

That used to be my dream too.

Ours.

And now I’m standing here, about to turn that dream into something twisted, something she never asked for. I don’t even know where it all went wrong. One day we were us, and the next... everything just cracked, shifted into something I can’t fix no matter how hard I try.

And it fucking hurts.

It sits in my chest like something rotting, heavy and sharp, and no matter how much I try to justify it, it doesn’t ease up. Because I know, deep down, I’m the one about to break her.

But what the hell am I supposed to do?

Things changed. Fate stepped in and rewrote everything without asking either of us. I can’t just turn my back on my fated mate, can’t ignore that pull, it’s carved into me whether I like it or not. And trying to fight it feels like I’m tearing myself apart from the inside.

Still... it doesn’t make this any easier.

Because there’s this sick, quiet thought clawing at me...

That this might be the last time I ever see Ashley look at me the way she used to. Like I was her whole world. Like I was enough.

After today... I lose that.

I lose her.

And just thinking about it makes my chest tighten so hard I can barely breathe. It makes something violent stir under my skin, like I want to rip this pain out of me and shove it into someone else, make them feel it instead.

Because I don’t want this.

I don’t want it to end like this.

If only she were my fated mate...

If only she were Alpha Derek’s real daughter...

If only...

But none of that matters now.

So many ’what ifs’ keep running through my head that I lose track of time again. How many times has that happened today? I don’t even know anymore.

People are starting to notice.

I can feel it in the way their eyes linger too long, the quiet murmurs, and the tension in the air. Even my parents have already pulled me aside, three times now, asking if I’m really going through with this.

Three times.

And every time, I gave them the same answer.

Yes.

But I saw it in their faces, they’re hesitating too. How could they not? Ashley grew up under their roof, under their watch. She wasn’t just someone they knew... she was family. Half their daughter, whether anyone says it out loud or not.

Still... they didn’t stop me.

They can’t.

Because I’ve already made my decision. Because I’m the one leading this pack now, and when I say something, it stands. My word isn’t something they can just overturn, not without tearing everything apart.

And maybe... maybe a part of them is relieved.

Because this gives them an excuse.

An excuse to stand back and watch Ashley fall without stepping in. To tell themselves it wasn’t their place, that their hands were tied. That they had no choice.

It lightens their guilt.

But what about me?

I’m the one doing it.

I’m the one standing here, about to make it happen.

So what’s my excuse?

...Should I really go through with this?

The thought hits harder than I expect, and for a second, I almost choke on it. I’ve second-guessed myself more times than I can count. Hell, I’ve nearly backed out of this more than once today alone.

But every single time—

Maddison’s face flashes in my mind.

And it’s like a switch flips.

All the things she went through, all the pain and the injustice, come rushing back, sharp and relentless, digging into me until I can’t ignore it. Until it feels wrong, impossible, to turn away from it.

My wolf doesn’t let me either.

It pushes, snarls, and demands that I follow through. That I don’t waver. That I don’t betray the bond that’s been carved into us.

So I stand here. 𝘧𝑟𝑒𝑒𝘸𝘦𝘣𝑛𝑜𝘷𝑒𝓁.𝘤𝘰𝓂

Torn apart, still choosing to move forward anyway.

I drag a hand up and pinch the bridge of my nose, eyes shutting tight as everything inside me grinds together until it feels like I’m coming apart. I’m exhausted, fucking exhausted, from thinking, from justifying, from forcing myself to keep moving forward when every part of me keeps pulling in a different direction.

I used to think I was strong.

Unshakable even.

But this? This has me buckling like a damn coward.

It’s eating me alive. And out of everything... the one thing I can’t shake, the one thing that keeps creeping back no matter how hard I try to bury it...

Is the thought of Ashley looking at me with hatred.

With resentment.

Like I’ve become someone she doesn’t recognize.

That thought alone twists something deep in my chest, makes it hard to even breathe.

And yet... there’s a stubborn part of me that desperately keeps clinging to something else. To the belief that she’ll understand. That she always has, and she always will. Ashley’s smart. She sees things clearly. And more than that...

She loves me.