Hell App (Web Novel CN) - Chapter 83: Nursery Rhymes

The suicide of a high school girl following the rejection of her crush whom she confessed to roused the soul of a Scorpio* Marshal from her 200 million years of slumber — she reincarnated into the body of Xuan Mo. And so, she decided to live on Earth on behalf of the girl! However, it was quite the miserable situation for an alien to own two different sets of memories. She had to use her peculiar mental power to peep into the previous owner’s memories regarding everyday, mundane matters while trying to rein in her cutting aura pretending to be a normal human…

But her shocking performance during military training definitely must have floored everyone. Okay fine, her incredible finesse aside, what’s with the consecutive bullseye for every single round during their shooting competition? Was this something a normal female student is able to achieve? Shouldn’t you explain yourself a little damnit! And what’s with the multiple grade jumps, and being contended for by the various prestigious universities? What kinda havoc you try’na wreck with your low-key flaunting? I mean it’s a good thing she’s caught the eye of a special organisation and was entrusted with important tasks, but what’s with all aloof rule-breaking gameplay? She’s practically the walking definition of “hated by even the gods”.

What’s even stranger was that Xuan Mo’s only ever interested in warring matters and battling; she’ll only ever pay her ferociously blooming blossom luck as much heed as she minds the passing cloud with the mindset of crossing the bridge when she reaches it (wipes sweat) and can you be less insensitive when handling the various Earthlings’ endless crushing and eye-candying you?!

This all screeches to a halt however when she discovers the existence of someone else from her home-planet, so she’ll be needing a raincheck with the getting a “spouse” part of mortal life on the Blue Planet. Of course, we’re discussing this on the premise that she wanted to return home…

* T/N: 天蝎星 = scorpio; may be referring to the star sign “Scorpio” or the planet called “Scorpio Planet” (to be determined later in the story)

Painfully shy and conflict-averse, Yun Ruoyan is a scion to a noble house only in name, a puppet embroiled in political machinations beyond her ken. At the tender age of eighteen, poisoned and at death’s door, she finds herself thrown out into the streets. Her relatives have all been executed, betrayed by her dear husband and her cousin. With her dying breath, she curses her own weakness and swears revenge.

When Yun Ruoyan awakens once more, she is thirteen, transported five years into the past by the will of the heavens. Her death-defying experience has changed her: no longer is she the malleable creature she once was. But more questions await at every corner—what is the truth behind the birthmark that disfigures her appearance? What are the circumstances surrounding her mother’s mysterious death?

Will the phoenix rise from the ashes, or will she fall once more in thrall to fate?

My girlfriend is too beautiful.

And, she treats me so nicely.

I didn’t even confess, I was confessed to.

So…

Why me…?

The best actor was shooting a doomsday movie when he suddenly transmigrated to a real doomsday world and became Aon Flearov, a young man with a huge debt and a blood-sucking family.What does one do in the apocalypse?Of course, shoot variety shows, live streams, do ads, act in movies, hold concerts and fan meetings—The whole showbiz world was placed in real apocalypses, and Aon, a newly-debuted doomsday star, was thrown to a random variety show to fight zombies!It was at this desperate moment that Aon awakened a superpower—A system.DING! [Heyo, dad, your son is online~]Aon: [Son, are you a farming system? A counterattack system? A pay-to-win system?? Anything will do!]The system instantly burst into tears: [B-but dad, I'm a superstar system!]And so, in a doomsday dating variety show:The system picked and chose a few “cabbages” seriously:[Dad, do you want to find me a zombie step mom or an alien step dad? Old or young? One, two, three, or four?]In a doomsday gourmet show:The system handed a frying pan, spatula, guitar, piano:[Go, dad! I want a stir-fry zombie brain, alien omakase, mutated beast AYCE, spirit plant pancakes— ]In a doomsday idol survival show:The system looked at the zombies and aliens crying on their knees, begging for mercy:[Dad! They're all moved by your singing! They want an encore!][Dad! After you do the zombie dance, the zombies collectively change their race's name!]Doing part-time jobs in the eternal sun apocalypse, camping in a natural disaster doomsday, living with aliens, styling zombies in Doomsday Supermodel, turning into plants and fighting zombies, fighting against fellow doomsday celebrities in Doomsday Survival championships—Here, there are various shows you can and can't imagine. Name one, and it will come true.#An actor who cannot become a superstar isn't a good doomsday survivor#The three no:No R18No haremNo BL/Yuri— no bullying the author!PS: This novel is written by the author's cat