Lewd System in a Cultivation World Filled with Women?! - Chapter 3: Inside the Tent (18+)

“Welcome to the Cosmos of Madness!”

Said a man with long red hair and piercing golden eyes as he descended from the stars.

“You have been chosen for a great purpose! Task! Mission! Destiny!”

He shouted dramatically as countless worlds heard his every word, from the lowest peasants to the mighty entities in the lofty palaces in the Higher Dimension.

“All of you accept your destiny as a sacrifice to Daemon Sultan, Blind Idiot God, Primordial Demiurge, Azathoth!”

And then Apocalypse descended.

***

Follow the journey of self-named Samiel Zentaur, a half-mad worshipper of the Outer Gods, on the Path of Transcendence and in his path to find himself.

Bad news: Xu Yanmiao traveled back to ancient times, but he himself is lazy and uninterested in anything but internet cybersecurity, which is useless in ancient times.Good news: He’s bound to a system.Bad news: The system is called the Gossip System, not the fortune-telling kind, but the kind that contains other people’s private information and scandals. Utterly useless.More bad news: This system is also glitchy, and the extent of the bugs is unknown.Even more bad news: This body is that of a minor official who can attend court meetings, while Xu, the time traveler… doesn’t understand the classics, can’t write with a brush, and is at risk of being exposed for cheating in the imperial exams.Xu Yanmiao: “…”Forget it, just lie low, wait to die, maybe dying quickly could lead to another time travel.…In the court, the emperor was furious about state affairs, and the courtiers trembled in fear.Xu Yanmiao pretended to listen attentively but was actually focused on browsing the Gossip System.[Wow, the emperor just took in a 16-year-old noblewoman yesterday! A beautiful addition! He’s getting stronger with age! And he was tossing and turning in bed all night but still has such a powerful voice now! Amazing!] [This noblewoman used to be the crown prince’s concubine! And the crown prince even knows how to write passionate love letters!] [Wow wow wow! The crown prince sneaked into the grandpa’s harem… hiss—got intimate while the old emperor was attending court! Do it quickly! Why isn’t there any video…] [Huh? Why is there no sound?]Xu Yanmiao cautiously raised his head and glanced around.[What happened? Why is everyone kneeling? Where’s the emperor?]—The emperor went to catch adultery in the harem.The “imperial exam cheating” bomb finally exploded.Xu Yanmiao couldn’t explain why his handwriting on the exam paper didn’t match his usual handwriting, nor could he answer why he didn’t understand the classics.The evidence prepared by the ousted crown prince of the emperor hit the nail on the head, and his personal bodyguard was ready to drag Xu Yanmiao away to the prison, awaiting execution in the autumn.Xu Yanmiao held onto the gossip that proved his innocence but was in a quandary:How do I explain the source of my information…[Say that I secretly met with the Chief Examiner, the Minister of Rites, three nights before the exam? Impossible, that night, the Minister of Rites was dressed as a woman, spent the night at the General’s Mansion, with the general…]The general’s body shook, and he interjected: “Your Majesty!!!!”“Although the evidence of exam cheating is solid, I believe there’s still something fishy about this. It should be re-investigated! Especially Xu… Xu… Xu Yanmiao’s attire is neat and tidy! Someone who cares so much about their appearance, how could they tarnish their reputation!”The crown prince, who couldn’t hear his thoughts: ??[Also, what’s with saying that the examiner faking yawning and tiredness was intentionally leaving me a gap for cheating? He spent the night before the exam in the pigsty without sleeping, how could he not be tired the next day? But, surprisingly, the Imperial Academy lecturer actually believed in pig’s milk…]The Imperial Academy lecturer’s face went pale, and he burst out: “Your Majesty!!!!”“I… I agree with the General’s words! How could Xu Lang cheat in the exam! He… he… he deliberately drank a glass of pure water before the exam, believing that only good-hearted people can use pure things, such a kind-hearted person, how could he cheat in the exam!”Thinking he had everything under control, the crown prince: ??Xu Yanmiao was deeply moved.[They’re all good people, even if their brains don’t work well, they’re trying their best to find reasons and excuses for me.] [But I really have no way to turn the tables, alas, it’s a pity that I haven’t finished watching the TV series I’ve been following. The old emperor angered the empress last night and got kicked out of the bedchamber, and now I’m going to die before seeing the ending. He seems to be planning to paint his face with ink and pretend to be a cat to cheer up the empress…]“Bang—”The old emperor slammed the table, forcibly interrupting the continuous stream of thoughts: “I believe Xu Yanmiao did not cheat in the exam! Release him, innocent!”The civil and military officials couldn’t wait to echo, fearing that if they were too slow, Xu Yanmiao might spill more gossip.“Yes yes yes! Release him innocent!”“Long live Your Majesty!”“Your Majesty, please end the court session! Let Xu Lang go home and rest! You’ve tired him out by making him stand for so long!”The crown prince: ??Did Xu Yanmiao drug them with hallucinogens or something?

Recommended new novel: A heartwarming story set in the '90s, “Back to 1990, She Set the Surgical World on Fire”When Xie Wanying returned to 1996 and said she wanted to become a doctor, many laughed.“A phoenix begets a phoenix, a dog begets a dog. If a truck driver's daughter can become a doctor, then pigs can climb trees.”“Not only do I want to be a doctor, but I also want to be a female thoracic surgeon,” Xie Wanying declared. When medical relatives sarcastically told her, “There is not a single female leading thoracic surgeon in the country—who do you think you are!”After the college entrance exams, Xie Wanying entered the top surgical class in the country with the highest provincial science score, began as an intern in a top-tier capital hospital, and was fought over by the heads of surgery departments. She performed the world's first minimally invasive heart valve repair, marking the first surgery in the female surgical field!The Overseas Returnee Faction senior brother was a hot bachelor in the capital's circle and changed his QQ profile picture to one with his junior sister Xie.The young boss was a handsome man who came to the hospital every day to bring flowers and offer diamond rings.Not to mention the horde of well-wishers that had practically broken down the door of old Xie's house...——————“No woman loves a man who's not a little bit bad.”When a woman married him, everyone said, “This woman must be a bad woman who would stop at nothing to curry favor with him.”Everyone was curious about what kind of person Mrs. Xiao was when they heard that Mr. Xiao had gotten married.“My wife has overshadowed me. Everyone knows she is deaf, so they blatantly speak ill of her in front of her and openly discuss the bad things they plan to do to her,”Host: ............

As a Beta, Ning An’s goal in life was to work hard, make money and get rich. However, his own dear father changed his aspiration and made him become a military academy student. Initially, he wanted to spend his days lazing about. What? The first place in the year gets a generous scholarship? Then staying up to study and train my body is nothing at all! The first place scholarship is definitely mine!

The A in the opposite dorm: So you’re actually an O.

Ning An: Ah?

The A in the opposite dorm: I know. You’re risking it all to prove that an O is not inferior to an A.

Ning An: You know my ass. Laozi is a B.

The A in the opposite dorm: You need to correctly recognise your own gender ah.

Ning An: …. Teacher. Report. I’m afraid this person is stupid.

note: Pretending to be a B’ is 装B (Zhuang B). 装B also means to boast or show off

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