The Useless Consort Suddenly Makes A Comeback - Chapter 5: Excuses! Excuses!

You Liangxing would never open the speech function in game.

Warning: This work contains elements of mature content featuring sex, violence, and gore.

Follow the journey of a wandering drunk swordsman who will punch immortals, kick demons, and cut down gods as he ascends the heavens in search of better women and wine.... hic...

Women, Wine, and Wager

The three most terrible vices a man could possess. Luckily, Duncan was only afflicted with two - women & wine. As an ordinary spirit stone miner, Duncan only cared about earning money to indulge in his two vices.

However, Duncan's fate had a twist in the form of a cantankerous old man who wanted to both reward and punish him in good measure. It leaves Duncan with a rather poor opinion of cultivators in general.

Pulled into the world of cultivation unwittingly, Duncan only cares for three things. His sword, his wine, and his women.

Jack Smith’s life ended rather abruptly. Spinning out on ice while driving a truck was not the most magnificent method to depart this earth. A mediocre man he had led an ordinary life until his death. Now with a second chance at life, he decided that this time he would be exceptional. This time he would finally live up to his name. After all, a jack of all trades is a master of none but ultimately better than one.Armed with a system and determination to do his best he sets out like any other reincarnated soul in another world to find his place and achieve great things. There is just one small problem with getting started in this endeavour . . . he is yet to be born!Welcome to a progression fantasy with a twist. What might you be able to achieve if your race to the top began before your body had even been born?Join our hero as he masters the language, magics and skills of the Compass Kingdoms but his first great challenge will be learning to walk once more. . . . .Warning 1: Be prepared for the MC to spend an entire book's worth of words and time as an infant but hopefully you will enjoy it nevertheless.Warning 2: Grandfather is legally abusive to MC for a couple of chapters but he is removed from that situation around chapter 30. To be edited out some time in the future.

In 2121, a terrible pollution disease swept through the world.

“We call it distortion, but perhaps, the history records of later generations will call it an evolution.”

The world experienced involution.

Today, that person’s head split into two. Tomorrow, that flower would grow fangs. The day after that, that fish would climb ashore with its legs…

Lu Yan: And I am merely a mediocre doctor who treats the pollution disease.

*

Patient A: When I first grew 18 tentacles, I was having a great time eating [beep—] by the seaside. As soon as Dr. Lu came, he cut 17 of them for me. He’s really a brilliant doctor!2

Patient B: I am a poisonous mushroom. My spores are highly toxic and can be parasitic. I gave birth to hundreds of thousands of microspores, which made it worse for my already poor family. Dr. Lu helped me practice family planning when he came. This great kindness will forever be remembered!

Patient C: I have eight mouths. I was a picky eater and only ate meat, so I set up a slaughterhouse for this purpose. But then, Dr. Lu cured my picky eating. This woman of faith is willing to be a vegetarian for the rest of her life in exchange for Dr. Lu’s happiness and well-being in this life.

Lu Yan, the top of the food chain, the eternal god.

- Description from Novelupdates