You've Got Mail: A Cautionary Tale - Chapter 85 - Advisor Wu Toughens Up

*WARNING: Minor Girls and boys should stay away!*When an introverted nobody meets an untimely and embarrassing end in his bathroom, his journey doesn’t end there.Reincarnated in an urban world as a father, he finds out his son is destined Heavenly Child —a young man blessed by the heavens with unimaginable fate—he’s thrust into a life filled with fame, power, riches, and women. But this isn’t a typical shit story.While many 'noobie' seems like the main character in a classic hero’s tale, 'Alex' our reincarnated middleman decides to forge his own path.Navigating the intricate webs of powerful families, he reshapes his fate using sharp wit, newfound confidence, and an unexpected advantage to pursue everything he’s ever dreamed of.But why does his son, blessed with unimaginable potential, live as a son-in-law to a third-rate family? As mysteries unfold, revelations of magic, cultivation, and an impending apocalypse emerge. And why a daughter? How will she fit into this intricate web of destiny?Note/Warning:This novel is entirely fictional. Events, characters, and settings are not based on the real world and will evolve according to reader wishes. Expect updates a minimum of 4 chapters per week (unless the author decides otherwise).Join a tale of ambition, power, and family dynamics in a world where the lines between protagonist and supporting characters blur. Who will truly claim the throne of destiny?

No one told Xie Qiao that the after effects of transmigrating into a fetus would be so great. The moment she did it, she became sickly. Fortunately, she had maximum affinity with living creatures. The animals she reared could fight, the herbs she planted could live. She could write talismans, read fortunes, and get rid of love interests. She could perform divination, detect aura, and read Fengshui. She could also good at the chess, music, literature, art, carving, and cooking, so she could earn a lot of money. And she was now taken back by the crown prince. “I heard that the princess consort brought about a lethal fate to her parents since young, and she has a lethal destiny. She’s someone who will not live long. If she marries the crown prince, she might not be able to protect her life. Very soon, she’ll kick the bucket!”This was the secret news of the imperial city.Several years later…“Grandfather, Grandmother, did anyone place bets on when you’re going to die today?”

What if being the protagonist was actually the WORST possible choice?Li Hanfeng thought he'd gotten the short end of the reincarnation stick—transmigrated into a cultivation world with “only” Upper Grade spiritual roots. Sure, he joined the prestigious Shushan Sect, but compared to those Heavenly Grade chosen ones? He was clearly destined to be a background character.Then his golden finger awakened.The Karma Detection System.Suddenly, Li Hanfeng could see the true cost of every “opportunity” before him. That mysterious cave everyone's excited about?[Great Karma: Ancient Tomb][Death Rate: 97%].The beautiful junior sister asking him on a “simple” mission?[Path of Destiny][Triggers: Sect Destruction, Heavenly Tribulation, Outer Domain Demons].Wait... being the protagonist means a 90% chance of horrible death?!NOPE.While other disciples fight over “destiny” and “fortune,” Li Hanfeng discovers something incredible: his system doesn't just detect karma—it “rewards him for avoiding it”. Refuse a death flag mission? Get premium cultivation pills! Skip the mysterious inheritance? Unlock rare techniques! Dodge the protagonist route entirely?His cultivation speed actually INCREASES.“Junior Sister, I'm busy that day.”“Senior Brother, that treasure isn't for me.”“Sorry everyone, I'll pass on saving the world.”[Karma Severed Successfully! Reward: Immortal-Grade Technique]But there's a problem: the more protagonist flags he dodges, the stronger he becomes. And the stronger he becomes, the more the world tries to drag him into main character scenarios.Ancient masters want him as a disciple. Mysterious beauties keep appearing. Evil sects mark him as a threat. Even his own karma system seems shocked by how overpowered his “background character” route is becoming.Li Hanfeng just wanted to cultivate peacefully and avoid death flags.Instead, he accidentally became the most terrifying existence in the cultivation world.The kind of person who's so strong that destiny itself has given up trying to make him the protagonist.

Mo Tianliao was a master weaponsmith and a demonic cultivator. When news spread that he was about to complete a divine weapon, cultivators from both the demonic and orthodox sides chased him down and killed him. In a stroke of luck, he managed to possess a new body and was reborn.

So what was the first thing on his mind after his rebirth? Avenging his death? Taking over the world?

Mo Tianliao: I have to find my cat!

—
Mo Tianliao: Why won’t you let me hug you? You used to be my cat!

Master: (unsheathes claws)

Mo Tianliao: Ahaha, this disciple has too much respect for Master, this disciple can’t bear to let Master walk on the ground!

Master: (lifts paw, sends disciple flying)

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