A Luna for Alpha Kieran-Chapter 31: Not worthy enough?

Autumn stood outside Kieran’s study, her hands clammy against the folds of her dress. She took a breath, lifted her hand to knock... hesitating for some unknown reason...

"Autumn, come in!"

She froze.

Of course he knew she was there. He always did.She was ’bound’ to him... like he knew her every breath... but then why did he not know she was already there... hiding at the guest Hall when the Bloodfangs... that slap... it still rang... not on her cheeks but in some corner of her heart.

She quickly shook her head, distorting that image... she was there to thank him...and apologize for the upcoming mayhem... not the other way around!

Quickly, she smoothed the creases of her crimson red gown and ran her fingers through her hair, unsure why she even bothered.He had... ’had’ her when she looked worse...hardly better than a beggar!

This wasn’t a date. This was a confrontation she had avoided for days... she wanted things to normalise... because he had given up a lot for her already that day... she was offering herself as some sort of... compensation... no love... no time or space for love... right? Or was it already there?

Psst! Who cared! She tried shrugging off her thoughts!

As she stepped inside, Kieran did not look up immediately. His desk was cluttered with what looked like maps, old scrolls, and a dozen letters sealed with foreign crests.

The fire behind him cast a soft glow across the polished wood.His eyes finally flicked up, scanning her from head to toe. One brow arched...which was barely noticeable, yet painfully loud.

Then he looked back down at his paperwork as if her presence was not worth a second thought.

Autumn’s chest tightened, the door clicking shut behind her sounding more like a trap than a welcome.

Should she turn around?

Go back?

Was she disturbing him?

Was he annoyed that she was there?

Before she could move, Kieran spoke.His voice calm, cold, distant. "Sit. You came here for a reason, didn’t you?"

Her lips parted, but no words came out. She hesitated, then slowly walked to the chair across from his, perching on the edge like a schoolgirl awaiting judgment from the principal.

Her fingers picked at a loose thread on her dress...then found the iron paperweight on his desk shaped like a wolf’s head.

She turned it in her hands nervously...too fast...fidgeting...because obviously ,she was nervous...and it slipped. "Oh..."

She reached down, but Kieran had already moved, and their hands collided beneath the desk.

Both froze.Their fingers stayed entwined around the cold iron. The fire crackled behind.

For a second...or a full minute...or several minutes...neither spoke. Their eyes locked under the desk, as if that small space had become its own world, its own battlefield of unsaid things.

Kieran’s jaw ticked, and he was the first to sit up. He placed the paperweight firmly back on the desk.

Autumn slowly sat back as well, her heart hammering in her chest.

"Thank you," she murmured.

He did not respond.

She shifted, then finally found the courage to continue, "But I am really sorry. I did not want to put you in such a difficult position, Kieran. Not where you have to fight for your own pack’s survival. It is... it is all so messed up. I really am sorry.I don’t know how..."

Kieran’s eyes stayed locked on a letter, but his jaw clenched. "What did you think would happen, Autumn? When you defy the Council, when you walk right into a Hunt with fire in your voice and no plan to back it up...you invite war.And that’s exactly what we did! "

’We’... Not ’you’.... Was this... acceptance?

He finally looked up at her. His gaze was sharp, stormy. "War demands blood. That’s the cycle. You knew that."Autumn swallowed hard, her voice faltering. "You think I wanted this? But here we are...we need to get things moving forward...not backwards..."

Autumn gazed down... a little ashamed.

"You should know better," Kieran interrupted, leaning back. "You are a Beta’s daughter, after all."

She let out a bitter, humorless laugh, shaking her head. "Well, only in name. My father never thought so."

Kieran studied her, his expression unreadable.

Then, quietly, "So if Beta Roanoke is your father..."

"I told you," she cut in sharply, her voice rising before she caught herself. "He never considered me his daughter. End of story. I don’t want to talk about that."

A tense silence settled between them.

Kieran looked away, his fingers tapping the edge of the desk. "Neither do I...if that bothers you..but...we need to talk about your lineage...at some point...it’s...important...," he muttered.

Autumn blinked.

That... hurt more than she expected.

"So that’s it?" she asked softly. "You are just going to need to talk about my family matters?How I have been unwanted ever since my birth? More things to laugh about me, huh? Ok! I see where this is going...I don’t mind.You do what you have to do, Alpha! "

Kieran looked back at her. "You are wrong. I bleed for what still can be saved.And the knowledge about your lineage is necessary...for several reasons..."

"Then talk to me!" she exclaimed, rising suddenly. "Talk to me...tell me what’s so important about it. Explain."

"I can’t, Autumn!Not at the moment.I did tell you whatever I could. About my father...think of it as something related to that. " His voice thundered, loud enough to make the fire behind him flicker. "Because...I can’t handle you the way I wanted to...from the very beginning...every time I look at you, I am reminded of what I am about to lose. Of what you dragged into the line of fire."

She stared at him, stunned by the rawness of his voice.Confused by his words... Like most of the time.

"I told you I didn’t mean to..."

"I know you didn’t," he said, calmer now. "But intention doesn’t protect lives. Strategy does.Besides...I am not even talking about just this war..."

A long silence stretched again, heavier this time.

Finally, Autumn whispered, "Then let me help. Not as Roanoke’s daughter...Just... as me.Or don’t you think I am capable ?" She definitely, completely missed his point... But... Well...

Kieran’s gaze softened just a little. His voice dropped.He didn’t bother correcting her... Instead...

"And if helping me breaks you?"

She blinked rapidly, her voice barely audible. "Then at least I broke standing beside you."

Something passed between them...sharp, too fragile...like it has been holding on to the edge for centuries. Kieran looked down at the paperweight again.

"You are still a reckless idiot," he muttered.

"And you are still infuriating," she shot back, managing a small smile...shy.Yet burning...They stared at each other again, the tension melting into something deeper.

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