©Novel Buddy
An Unexpected Proposal-Chapter 69
October 29, 2020
"…Was that the problem?"
"…"
"The reason you rejected me."
Alicia instinctively swallowed. The man staring at her had eyes sharp enough to cut.
"Mikael is just an ordinary child. He always has been, and he always will be. But… in this world, there's always an ‘if’."
Her voice trembled. Even now, she was afraid. What if his piercing gaze turned into a blade aimed at her child?
"I don’t easily go back on my decisions."
"…"
So, nothing had changed after all.
Alicia pulled Mikael—who was sleeping with an innocent expression—closer into her arms. Even if Cabelenus chose to turn his back on Mikael, it wouldn’t change anything. Just as before, she would protect her child alone. But her throat tightened. At some point, without realizing it, she must have harbored some hope.
"I told you, I will do as you wish."
"Ah…"
"I've decided to protect both you and the child. That’s all."
Cabelenus reached out, his calloused hand gently cupping Alicia’s cheek. Careful, as if afraid he might hurt her. His touch was always like that. Alicia hesitated, unsure of what expression to make.
"…I can’t believe you. How could I possibly believe something like that now?"
"Then don’t. Keep doubting me. It doesn’t matter. I’m used to being used and broken."
"…"
Alicia’s pupils wavered. Looking back, she realized—she knew nothing about Cabelenus. She had never truly understood the kind of life he had lived. All she had ever done was vaguely guess. The realization left her speechless.
"I don’t mind."
"…"
"As long as you stay by my side, I truly don’t mind. So, just give me orders."
Whatever you want, I’ll put it in your hands.
Cabelenus’s eyes gleamed strangely. His gaze had always been fixed on her—no matter the moment. Alicia, unable to hold back any longer, crumpled into silent tears.
***
"James. Are you okay?"
"It's just my pride that got hurt. My body’s fine."
James shrugged playfully, but his expression wasn’t as lighthearted as his tone.
"I'm sorry. Because of me—"
"I really don’t want to hear that. This wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t hesitated in the first place."
A bitter smile spread across James’s lips. If he had reached for Alicia’s hand without hesitation when they were attacked, maybe things would have turned out differently.
"You have nothing to feel guilty about. The truth is, I just wasn’t strong enough."
Alicia lowered her gaze slightly. This wasn’t James’s fault. She had known her own limitations, yet she had let her guard down, relying too much on her power. That was her mistake.
"Still, if this happens again, please—don’t hesitate next time."
"…How could I not?"
The first time James witnessed Alicia’s ability, he thought it was nothing short of a miracle. Compared to the priests who deceived people under the guise of divine will, she seemed far more real. A being who could grant any wish—wasn’t that the very definition of godhood?
But she wasn’t a god.
Her power was not a gift. It was a curse.
"Promise me."
"…"
"Please."
"…Is Mikael alright?"
James couldn’t bring himself to answer. Instead, he changed the subject. Alicia saw through it immediately but let it go with a small nod.
"He was frightened, so I gave him medicine to help him sleep. His body is fine. He’ll be better once he gets some rest."
"That’s a relief."
"You protected Mikael when we fell. It was thanks to you that he wasn’t hurt."
"That was the least I could do."
James’s eyes drifted to his bandaged wrist. The injury meant he wouldn’t be able to paint for a while, but the dull ache wasn’t what pained him most.
It was the helplessness.
He had never regretted choosing a brush over a sword. But this time was different.
Unlike Cabelenus, who drew his sword for Alicia without a second thought, James had been powerless.
"You have no idea how much I appreciate you. I still have a long way to go before I can repay all the help you’ve given me."
"If you’re really grateful, then stop saying things like that. I haven’t done anything worth thanking me for."
"You’ve done more for me than you realize. And now, you’ve even hurt your hand because of me."
"It wasn’t because of you. I did it because I wanted to."
James’s brows furrowed deeply.
The truth was, he had done nothing.
Alicia had only ever taken as much as she could return. She never allowed herself to take more than that. She always kept a distance—an invisible boundary that no one was allowed to cross.
"James, I—"
"You don’t have to feel sorry for me. And don’t say anything about repaying favors. Not now, not ever."
James spoke quickly, unable to hide his growing urgency.
He had thought he was content with their relationship as it was. But now, facing reality, he couldn’t help but feel anxious.
His opponent was Cabelenus.
The ruler of Schwarhan. A man of royal blood. A man of overwhelming strength. Even standing before him was enough to make others shrink back.
And above all, there was Mikael.
A child who, at first glance, seemed to be Alicia’s exact replica—but if you looked closely, traces of Cabelenus were there.
James knew.
He had known for a long time that Alicia sometimes stared at Mikael’s sleeping face and thought of Cabelenus.
He just never had the courage to acknowledge it.
"I don’t know what else to say, but we should move. The path ahead is rough, but if we cross to the other side of the mountain, we should be safe. Only a handful of people know about that route—"
"James, I’m sorry. You don’t have to help me anymore."
"…What? What are you saying?"
James let out a nervous laugh.
"Mikael and I… we’re not going to the capital."
Alicia let out a slow breath, her gaze lowered.
"You want me to go back alone? Without you and Mikael?"
"I can’t put you in danger."
"I can’t leave you behind."
James’s eyes widened.
He knew how dangerous this was. How could he possibly walk away?
"I appreciate your concern, but we can’t stay together any longer."
"…Is it because I’m not reliable enough?"
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"It’s because I care about you. This time, it was just a sprained wrist. But next time, there’s no guarantee it’ll end that way."
"Then what about you? It’s just as dangerous for you."
James’s expression twisted reflexively.
No matter how powerful Alicia was, the danger was the same.
"He said he would protect Mikael."
"…"
"So… I decided to accept his help."
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"…Alicia."
James stepped toward her hastily. Up close, he could see that her eyes were red, as if she had been crying.
"You said you couldn’t trust him. And yet, you’re still going to accept his help?"
"Honestly… I’m being very cautious. I still can’t trust him completely."
"If you can’t trust him, then refuse. It’s that simple."
James’s voice quickened.
"If I want to protect Mikael from those after him, I need his power. He’s the only one strong enough to stand against them."
"And who exactly are 'they'?"
"The Imperial Family. And the Prime Temple."
Alicia clasped her trembling hands together to hide the shaking. She hated every part of this situation. The monsters in Schwarhan, Cabelenus’s unreadable sincerity—none of it was comforting. Accepting his help might be like inviting disaster upon herself.
But no other option came to mind.
"The Imperial Family? The Temple? That’s ridiculous. Why would they target Mikael?"
"They believe he possesses a special power."
"But Mikael is ordinary now. He has no abilities. If anyone should be targeted, it’s not him…"
James trailed off, his instincts warning him against finishing that thought. He glanced around reflexively, as if checking for eavesdroppers.
"Even if Mikael has no power now, they’re not going to take my word for it."
"So you’re going to rely on him? Did you already forget why you couldn't return to Schwarhan in the first place?"
"I haven’t forgotten."
Even now, if she closed her eyes, she could see those golden irises staring down at her. Eyes filled with something too intense, almost blind in their fixation.
"You wanted Mikael to live an ordinary life."
"It’s better for him to never be normal than to live as a tool forever."
"Alicia."
"I’ve thought about everything. The best-case scenario, where everyone is safe. The worst-case scenario, where everything falls apart. I’ve considered and reconsidered every possibility, and this is the only conclusion I can accept. I won’t change my mind."
She raised her head, straightening her shoulders.
No matter how she looked at it, this was the best way to protect Mikael.
"I wanted to hide him forever if I could, but that’s no longer possible. Now that he’s been discovered, the Imperial Family and the Temple will never stop coming after him."
She had been careful. She had always been on guard. She hadn’t even counted Mikael’s age properly, excluding the years he had spent in his beast form. Instead of settling in one place, they had constantly moved.
And yet, they had found him anyway.
People that persistent wouldn’t simply give up.
"If Mikael falls into their hands, he’ll be ruined."
"Don’t be so pessimistic."
"It’s not pessimism. It’s reality."
Alicia’s fingers clenched so tightly that they turned white.
She knew better than anyone what a life of servitude and exploitation meant.
If Mikael still had power, they would use him as a tool.
If he had none, they would kill him—or worse, keep him in captivity, raising him in case his power ever returned.
Either way, it wouldn’t be a life worth living.
"…Did you know? When I first arrived in Schwarhan, I was so overwhelmed. The massive fortress of black stone seemed impossibly huge to me. And if Schwarhan felt that vast, then how much more terrifying must the Imperial Palace be?"
"You’re scared."
"Yes. I’m scared. Terrified. They are a force beyond comprehension, and compared to them, I’m insignificant."
Schwarhan was powerful, but it was still just a part of the empire.
The Imperial Family and the Prime Temple were the two greatest authorities in the empire.
Even with Cabelenus’s protection, she wasn’t sure they could stand against them.
"Even so, I have to protect Mikael. For my child, I would do anything. But…"
Alicia lifted her head and gazed at the sky, her mind momentarily distant.
Mikael had lost his power.
But she—she had regained hers.
"I don’t expect to protect him forever. When the worst finally happens, I already know what choice I’ll have to make."
"Don’t say things like that! The worst-case scenario won’t happen! Never!"
James shouted, his voice raw with emotion.
But Alicia only stared at him, her expression unwavering.
"There’s no such thing as ‘never.’"
"Alicia."
"All I can do is prepare for every possible variable and try my best to reach the best possible outcome."
Her gray eyes glinted coldly—like a perfectly sharpened blade.
"So I have no choice but to return to Schwarhan. If I disappear, the only one who can truly protect Mikael… is him."
Alicia closed her eyes for a brief moment before opening them again.
Now that she had made her decision, there was no hesitation left.
"People don’t change so easily."
"I know."
"You might regret this."
"Even so, I have no other choice."
She couldn't afford to act on emotion.
Not when she had almost lost Mikael once already.
She had to face reality and make the right decision.
"I will make him love Mikael. Even if I disappear, I’ll make sure he protects Mikael."
"And what if that backfires? What if Mikael ends up suffering because of it?"
"…"
"What if he doesn’t love Mikael? What if he realizes you sacrificed yourself for Mikael’s sake? Do you really believe he’ll still protect him then?"
"I’ll do everything I can to make sure that doesn’t happen."
Alicia’s voice trembled violently.
After all, this was the same man who, upon learning of Mikael’s existence, had once considered killing him simply because he might be a threat.
If she died trying to protect Mikael, she could already predict what Cabelenus would do.
And yet…
She had chosen to believe in him.
Or perhaps, she just wanted to believe.
"And if all your efforts end up being meaningless?"
"Then I’ll turn to the monsters for help. At least they won’t harm Mikael."
"Alicia, that—"
"In the end, there’s no way to predict every possibility. Whether things will go well or fall apart—we won’t know until the time comes."
"…"
"That’s why I have to make the best choice I can right now."
To give Mikael even the smallest chance at happiness.
Alicia pressed her palm against her chest.
The steady rhythm of her heartbeat was strangely reassuring.
She still had life left to burn.