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Hidden Desires - Family Secrets-Chapter 167 Did I see wrong that night? Part 2
If Betty had admitted to falling out of love, maybe I could have somewhat accepted that night she performed oral sex on Michael.
But now, she claims she still loves me, not Michael.
So why did she do it?
You see, during our intimate moments, Betty never once did that for me.
I never asked because I always saw her as the purest, most sacred part of my life, and I cherished her too much to let her near what I considered my dirtiest part.
But that night, I never imagined that Betty’s lips, which I considered the most sacred, would be defiled by Michael’s penis.
And she did it willingly.
"Please... no more..." Betty sobbed, crouching on the floor with her face in her hands, shaking her head violently as if my words had struck a deep wound.
She had clung to a fantasy that I had only seen a fraction of what happened that night.
But my words shattered her last illusion; I had seen it all, leaving her unable to accept or explain.
"In my heart, I always thought of you as the purest.
I cherished everything about you, not wanting you to be tainted.
But what I saw that night broke my heart.
Was I a fool all along?"
Seeing Betty cry, my heart ached, but it was nothing compared to my own sorrow.
"I’m mocking myself," I said, feeling a sourness in my nose as I spoke.
"No, stop... I’m so sorry, I don’t even know how to make it up to you..." Betty cried, shaking her head.
"This home has always been my only motivation.
No matter how dangerous it was outside, coming home to you always turned my worries into joy.
Every time I was physically and mentally exhausted, seeing you made all the fatigue vanish.
It felt like my efforts were meaningful.
But now, what am I supposed to do?"
At this point, my emotions surged, and I couldn’t hold them back.
I tasted the saltiness in my mouth; tears had started flowing, trickling into my mouth without my noticing.
They say men don’t easily cry unless deeply hurt.
"Please, no more..." Betty removed her hands from her face, now covering her ears, still shaking her head.
Seeing her frantic state, I took a deep breath, trying to suppress my emotions.
It wasn’t the time to push Betty further; it could drive her mad.
"I’ve wronged you in so many ways since we got married.
I always thought we’d be together forever, despite any hardships.
I never thought of leaving you.
But this mistake, I was so foolish, and by the time I realized I should stop it, it was too late.
We all make many mistakes in life, but I don’t know how to fix this one..."
As Betty’s emotions settled, she stopped crying, her eyes blurry.
Her calm was almost eerie, perhaps the crying had helped her regain some composure.
"Michael, Laura’s son, my ex-girlfriend’s son, haha, I thought I had never wronged Laura, but why did Laura’s son come to collect a debt from me?
And such a heavy one, costing me everything.
I could have sent Michael to his grandparents, or to an orphanage, or even to a boarding school, but I didn’t.
I had a promise and a guilt towards Laura, and I wanted to make up for your inability to have children.
But I never expected to let a wolf into our home, a thankless intruder who took my wife and left me with nothing.
Isn’t this just like the farmer and the snake?"
I said, watching Betty’s expression.
She didn’t meet my gaze, silently crying, biting her lip so hard it seemed she might draw blood.
When I finished speaking, she surprisingly didn’t respond, offer any explanations, or counterarguments.
"Why won’t you explain?
Is Michael off-limits to me?
Are you furious inside but just won’t say it?"
If Betty had just explained, maybe I could have felt a bit better.
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But now, her silence on the matter of Michael turned part of my sorrow into anger, making my words sharp and bitter.
Betty didn’t speak; she just bit her lip and shook her head, her furrowed brows showing her inner turmoil.
"And yet, you haven’t even asked about Michael.
Don’t you care what’s become of him?
This woman dared to put a real gun to your head, aren’t you afraid she might kill Michael?"
When I mentioned Michael, Betty’s eyes flickered with panic because she still cared about him but was too scared to ask.
By the time I finished my sentence, she had let go of her lip, her mouth agape, a look of horror spreading across her face.
Seeing Betty like this pained me.
She did care about Michael; she just hadn’t shown it until I pointed it out, and her true feelings finally surfaced.
But just seconds after showing that flicker of emotion, Betty’s expression relaxed, and she sighed with a bitter smile, a hint of mockery in it, though it was unclear whether she was mocking herself or someone else.
"I can’t even save myself, how can I save someone else?"
Betty wiped the corner of her eye, her voice weak.
"You’re probably thinking: ’It’s all your fault, don’t hurt Michael, you’re willing to take it all on yourself, he’s just a kid...’
Am I right?"
I said, interpreting her silence, my tone flat.
"You still know me so well, isn’t that ironic?
I do care about Michael; after all, he was the first to call me ’mom,’ which gave me some comfort.
But he also cost me my innocence.
I love him, but I also resent him.
I want to take responsibility, but I’m afraid it will make you angrier.
I’m not a selfish person, but in our love, I had to be selfish just this once.
If I had to choose between you and Michael, I would choose you, without a doubt.
I don’t want to talk about Michael too much..."
Betty said, finally shaking her head gently, covering her face with her hands, her expression one of helplessness and despair.
"You really don’t care about Michael at all?"
I couldn’t believe Betty’s attitude; I thought she would plead for Michael after seeing me, but her current demeanor surprised me.
"I care, we’ve been together so long, but I’m afraid to say more, just hoping you won’t do anything foolish..."
Betty said quietly, looking down.
Her reference to ’foolish things’ likely meant harming Michael, potentially leading me down a path of crime, partly pleading for him and partly showing her concern for me.
"You should go back. In a while, I’ll have her bring Michael to the front door, and you can go back together..."
After a brief silence, with nothing left to say, I turned away from Betty, my voice laden with deep fatigue.
I had wanted to gauge Betty and Michael’s situation, to see if she was telling me the truth, to find out if our marriage could still be saved.
But now, I was too scared to face the emotional turmoil.
Now, every time I close my eyes, I see scenes of Betty and Michael, especially what I witnessed that night, cutting through my heart like a knife.
After saying this, I closed my eyes.
The sunlight filtered through the window onto my face, warming my skin but not my heart.