The Bully Alpha's Fake Alpha Mate (BL)-Chapter 67: POST-HEAT SHAME

ASHER

I woke up to silence, not the comfortable kind but the kind that sat heavy in a room where too much had been said and nothing had been resolved.

Reed’s arm was still around my waist. His chest was still pressed against my back. His breathing was steady and even but I knew he wasn’t asleep because his thumb was moving in slow circles against my hip bone, the same restless pattern he’d traced during the spaces between waves when we were both too wrecked to do anything but wait for the next one.

The heat was gone completely and for the first time in what felt like days, my body was mine again. No fever burning under my skin, no desperate ache demanding to be filled, no Omega instincts screaming for my Alpha. It was just me and Reed. And the quiet morning light filtering through his curtains.

And for one perfect, fragile moment, I let myself believe everything had changed. The way Reed had held me through every wave. The way he’d brought me water and wiped the sweat from my skin and whispered that I was perfect. The way he’d looked at me with something soft in his eyes when I’d told him I needed him.

Maybe we’d finally broken through, maybe the heat had stripped away all the fighting and the hatred and left something real underneath. Maybe—

"You need to get up." Reed’s voice cut through my thoughts. Flat and emotionless like he was talking to a stranger and my chest tightened.

"Reed?" I said quietly.

"Get up, Asher. You need to get back to your dorm before people start asking questions."

The words were practical and reasonable but the tone was all wrong. Cold, distant and nothing like the way he’d spoken to me hours ago when he was still inside me and telling me I was doing so well.

I shifted slightly, trying to turn and look at him. "Can we talk about—"

"There’s nothing to talk about." Reed’s arm withdrew from my waist. The sudden absence of contact made the bond whimper but I ignored it. "Your heat’s over. That’s it."

That’s it like the past two days had been nothing, like everything that happened between us had meant nothing.

I sat up slowly, my whole body aching, and turned to face him.nReed was already sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to me. His shoulders were tense and his hands were clenched on his thighs.

"Reed—"

"Get dressed." He stood up without looking at me. "Your clothes are destroyed. There’s clean stuff in the bottom drawer. Take whatever fits."

He walked to the bathroom and closed the door. I sat there staring at the closed door, my chest getting tighter with every second.

This was wrong, everything about this was wrong.

Last night or this morning, or whenever the last wave had been, Reed had held me while the knot locked us together and pressed his forehead to mine and his hands had been so gentle and he’d looked at me like I was something precious.

And now he was acting like I was an inconvenience he needed to get rid of.

Maybe he just needs time, maybe he’s processing everything too and maybe once we talk properly—

I clung to that thought as I got out of bed and found clothes in his dresser. Sweatpants that were too long. A hoodie that smelled so completely like him it made my wolf purr with contentment.

The bathroom door opened and Reed came out fully dressed. His hair was wet, he’d showered and washed away any trace of me from his skin. The realization hurt more than it should have.

"Reed," I tried again. "Can we please just—"

"The heat’s over, Asher." Reed’s voice was flat. "You need to leave."

"I know, I just thought maybe we could talk about what happened—"

"What’s there to talk about?" Reed finally looked at me. His eyes were empty and cold. Nothing like the way he’d looked at me when I was falling apart in his arms. "You went into heat. I helped you through it. That’s what the bond demanded. End of story."

The words hit me like a physical blow and my world crashed.

"End of story?" My voice came out small and broken. "That’s it? That’s all it was to you?"

"What else would it be?" He asked and I stared at him. Searching for some sign of the Reed who’d whispered that I was perfect. The Reed who’d held me through every wave and made me feel safe. The Reed who’d looked at me with something soft and real in his eyes but that Reed was gone or maybe he’d never existed in the first place.

"I thought—" I stopped, swallowing hard against the tightness in my throat. "I thought maybe things were different now. Between us." 𝓯𝙧𝓮𝓮𝒘𝓮𝙗𝙣𝒐𝒗𝒆𝓵.𝓬𝓸𝒎

"Different how?"

"I don’t know. Just—" I gestured helplessly. "Different. After everything that happened. Everything we—"

"Everything we what?" Reed’s expression didn’t change. "Fucked? Knotted? Yeah, we did. Six times. So what?"

The casual cruelty of it made me flinch.

"You said—" My voice was shaking now. "You said you’d always take care of me. You said I was perfect. You—"

"I said what you needed to hear to get you through your heat." Reed’s voice was matter-of-fact. Empty of anything resembling emotion. "That’s what Alphas do during heats. We take care of our Omegas. We say things to make them feel safe. It doesn’t mean anything."

The floor dropped out from under me. It doesn’t mean anything. Was I weak for thinking that maybe for once, Reed would finally notice me and really look at me and maybe fall in love with me. I should have accepted his response and just left but deep down part of me wanted to still believe that maybe all this was just acting up.

"You’re lying," I whispered.

"I’m not."

"Yes, you are. I felt—through the bond, I felt—"

"You felt what the bond wanted you to feel." Reed crossed his arms. "Heat and rut make everything more intense, make everything feel more real than it is but now they’re over and we’re back to reality."

"And what’s reality?" The question came out broken.

"Reality is that you’re an Omega. I’m an Alpha. You’re mine because I claimed you and heat changes nothing about that arrangement."

Heat changes nothing. The words echoed in my head. Devastating and final. I’d been so stupid. So fucking stupid. I’d let myself believe that somewhere between the bathroom floor and his bed, between the first wave and the sixth knotting, something real had formed between us. That the way he’d held me and the things he’d whispered and the softness in his eyes had meant something.

But it had all been an act. A performance. Things he said to get me through my heat because that’s what the bond demanded.

None of it had been real.

"I need you to understand something," Reed said. His voice was still that same flat, emotionless tone that was tearing me apart. "What happened during your heat doesn’t change our arrangement. You’re still mine. You still submit when I call you. You’re still mine to use however I want."

"How you—" I couldn’t finish the sentence, I couldn’t even process what he was saying.

"Heat changes nothing, Asher." Reed’s eyes were hard. "You’re still my Omega and still my property. The only difference now is that the bond is stronger. Which means you’ll find it even harder to resist when I call. Which works out perfectly for me."

Each word was a knife between my ribs.

I’d told him I needed him. I had cried his name, I had begged him not to let go, I had let every wall crumble and shown him the part of me I’d spent my entire life hiding and he was using it against me.

"You’re a fucking monster," I whispered.

"Maybe." Reed shrugged. "But I’m your monster, your Alpha and you’re mine. That’s all this is and that’s all this will ever be."

Tears were burning in my eyes but I refused to let them fall. Not her and definitely not in front of him.

"Get out of my room, Asher." Reed turned away. Dismissing me. "And clean yourself up before you go back to your dorm. You smell like sex and my knot. I don’t need everyone on campus knowing what we did even if they already know that you are my property already."

The casual cruelty of it shattered something in my chest. I grabbed my destroyed clothes from the floor and held them against my chest even though I had nothing to do with them.

"One more thing," Reed said without turning around. "Next time I text you, you come immediately. Just like before. Heat changes nothing. You’re still mine to use whenever I want. Understood?"

I couldn’t speak. My throat was too tight. My chest was too full of something that felt like my heart breaking into pieces.

"Understood?" Reed repeated. His voice was harder now and commanding.

"Understood," I whispered.

Then I left. I made it halfway across campus before I had to stop. My legs gave out and I sank down onto a bench and pressed my face into my hands and finally let myself fall apart.

The memories wouldn’t stop. The way Reed had held me. The way he’d whispered against my skin. The way he’d looked at me with something soft in his eyes and made me believe—just for a moment—that I was something more than property to him but it had all been a lie or worse—it had all been real in the moment and Reed had simply decided it didn’t matter once the heat was over.

Either way, the result was the same.

I’d fallen for someone who would never fall for me. I was falling for my tormentor, for the Alpha who’d claimed me and controlled me and was now using the most vulnerable moments of my life against me.

And there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Because even now, even after everything Reed had just said, some pathetic part of me still wanted to go back. Still wanted to crawl into his bed and press against his chest and let him hold me.

The bond was purring at the thought. My wolf was whimpering for its Alpha and I hated myself for it.

I hated that I’d let my walls down, I hated that I’d told him I needed him. I hated that I’d called him Alpha like it was a prayer instead of a curse.

I hated that somewhere between the first wave and the sixth knotting, I’d started to fall in love with Reed Jackson and he’d just made it devastatingly clear that the feeling would never be mutual.

My phone buzzed.

Reed: And Asher? Don’t get any ideas about what happened during your heat. It was biology. Nothing more. You’re still just my Omega. My toy. Mine to use. Remember that.

The tears came harder and I turned off my phone and sat on that bench and let myself break completely because I’d been falling and Reed had just pushed me off the edge.