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The Guide to Conquering Earthlings-Chapter 34: 0
Chapter 34
After exploring all the indoor attractions at the amusement park, it was already getting late. And Lan Xi, the unreliable "fellow villager," finally concluded the romantic rainy atmosphere that she arranged. However, unfortunately, Xie Cheng's phone and bank card were still affected, and he still couldn't make payments.
It was simply too perfect!
Lan Xi brimmed with confidence, saying, "Let me take you out for dinner."
She had everything planned out and was full of confidence, saying, "I've arranged a place with a very artistic ambiance!"
...
Thirty minutes later, Xie Cheng looked at the small hill in front of him, his face filled with disbelief. "Is this the place with artistic ambiance?"
"Not yet, not yet. Let's grab something to eat first. After that, I'll take you there!" Lan Xi remained composed as she took out two bottles of Evian water and handed one to Xie Cheng. "Drink up! I just bought this. I'll cover all the expenses tonight!"
Xie Cheng was indeed a bit thirsty, so he took the bottle of Evian water and finished it in one gulp.
After finishing, he tossed the bottle into the trash can and then turned to look at Lan Xi. "Let's go, let's have dinner."
Currently, the two of them were in a park behind the amusement park. As far as Xie Cheng knew, there were indeed several high-end restaurants in this park. They were in high demand due to the pleasant environment and skilled chefs. Most of them required a reservation a month in advance, and the prices were also very expensive.
Presumably, Lan Xi planned to take him to such a restaurant.
This trip showed that Lan Xi was considerate. She even knew how to match Xie Cheng's style. She didn't prepare ordinary mineral water but Evian water. She chose a restaurant with a good environment, even if it meant spending a lot of money on dinner. It showed that despite her social awkwardness, she had grown to some extent. Lan Xi deep down acknowledged his efforts for her. Although she was stingy with money earlier, being reluctant to buy fast passes and cutting budgets here and there, it was understandable that she wanted to save money for the important things. Since most of the budget was spent on food, it was forgivable.
Xie Cheng decided to forgive Lan Xi.
It wasn't in vain that he worked overtime all week and sacrificed this day to accompany her at the amusement park, enduring the curious and disdainful gazes of elementary school students as they lined up five times to ride the childish carousel.
Lan Xi was grateful, and that brought Xie Cheng some comfort.
Even though his bank card and mobile payment were inexplicably malfunctioning, Xie Cheng decided to give Cao An a call after dinner to have him remotely scan the payment code.
Considering that Lan Xi didn't earn much, her willingness to treat him to such an expensive restaurant was enough. Xie Cheng appreciated her attitude. Therefore, he decided to foot the bill himself.
However, before Xie Cheng could further bask in his relief, he heard Lan Xi's surprised voice:
"Dinner? Didn't we just eat?"
She casually pointed to the glass bottle of Evian water in her hand and said, "Didn't I already treat you to a meal?"
Xie Cheng was taken aback. "This is just water."
"Yes, it's water." Lan Xi nodded solemnly. "Haven't you heard the saying? 'A meal is not complete without water.'"
"This water, with bubbles, fills our empty stomachs and makes us feel more satisfied. Our previous connection, just like these bubbles, seems to be endless. Isn't it true that the more we drink, the more fulfilled we become?"
Lan Xi confidently said, "That's why this water is a validator of our emotions. Look, after drinking it, aren't you no longer hungry?"
"...," Xie Cheng gritted his teeth.
Lan Xi confidently replied, "I knew you wouldn't be hungry."
With a deep affection in her eyes, Lan Xi looked at Xie Cheng and asked, "Do you know why?"
Why else?
Xie Cheng was infuriated. If he worked so hard all day and still wasn't hungry, there was only one explanation—his stomach was messed up!
His stomach was fine, so he was very hungry!
However, Lan Xi seemed completely absorbed in her own world.
She looked at Xie Cheng again, her lips slightly parted, and with great emphasis and significance, she said, "It's because you love me!"
...
Tonight, Lan Xi was determined to win.
Success or failure depended on this battle. Tonight was the key to whether she could marry Xie Cheng.
She stayed up late last night, meticulously reading the chapter on marriage in the "Guide to Conquering Earthlings," and suddenly realized that proposing wasn't something only men could do—it could also be done by women! As long as the emotions were there and the atmosphere was right, when a woman took the initiative to propose, the man would usually be moved and agree on the spot.
Xie Cheng might be shy, but instead of waiting for him to propose, Lan Xi decided to take matters into her own hands and propose herself!
"Before a woman takes the initiative to propose, she needs to make the man aware of how much she values the relationship. After all, some Earthlings don't realize how dependent they are on their partners and try to avoid marriage at the mention of it. Therefore, before proposing, the woman needs to design a scenario that makes the man realize he can't live without her, face his own feelings, and become aware that the intensity of his love for his partner has reached the point of being ready for marriage. Afterward, when the woman takes the initiative to propose, it will be a sure success..."
Now, Lan Xi could recite the theoretical knowledge from the guidebook by heart.
Through months of accumulated learning, Lan Xi had also remembered an old Earth saying—love can quench your thirst!
Although as a Mu Yi Star alien, she couldn't understand how drinking water could satisfy hunger, fragile Earthlings had their strengths. It turned out that once they developed feelings, all they needed was water! Quite economical and environmentally friendly!
Therefore, being resourceful, she had already arranged in advance this scenario of love-quenching water.
If Xie Cheng drank the water but didn't feel hungry, he would realize that his feelings for her were so strong that even drinking water could satiate him.
With such intensity, marriage would naturally follow!
So, next, Lan Xi was about to make her final move and propose!
She stayed up all night consulting the "Guidebook" and researching online for half the night. She decided to propose in the most secure way possible, so she surveyed the location early and made preparations in advance. Now, she gazed affectionately at Xie Cheng, asking him to wait for her a little while longer.
Lan Xi hurriedly walked towards the bamboo forest on the back mountain. There, she had already arranged candles in the shape of a heart and placed Xie Cheng's photo surrounded by fresh flowers.
Lan Xi took out a lighter and lit the candles one by one.
Soon, the desired effect emerged. It was now the moment just after sunset, with the sky on the verge of turning into night. The flickering candlelight was both romantic and gentle, surrounded by a cluster of flowers. Xie Cheng's photo, positioned within the heart-shaped arrangement of candles, smiled back at her.
One
() Ready to go!
Lan Xi smiled with satisfaction ().
? ()? () ,
She led him to the previously prepared location.
**
When Lan Xi mentioned being "well-fed with love," Xie Cheng initially thought it was a joke. However, he couldn't find any traces of humor on Lan Xi's face. Her expression and tone were very serious.
Xie Cheng deeply regretted it.
Expecting Lan Xi to act normally was the most abnormal thing of all.
She really had no intention of eating!
And the most astonishing thing was her audacious statement that rang through his ears—
"Because you love me!"
In a daze, Xie Cheng felt as if a thunderbolt had struck from the sky, leaving him dumbfounded. But Lan Xi didn't give him a chance to explain or question her. After briefly leaving, she returned and pulled Xie Cheng along.
"Come, I'll take you to a place with artistic conception."
Unaware of the audacious words she had just spoken, Lan Xi remained calm and composed, holding Xie Cheng's hand as they walked deeper into the bamboo forest on the back mountain.
The environment here was tranquil and full of greenery, but it also felt increasingly desolate. Upon bypassing the bamboo forest, Xie Cheng finally saw the arrangement in front of him—on the open grassland, a circle had been formed with candles, and in the center of the candles, there was a photo. Due to the angle and distance, Xie Cheng hadn't been able to see clearly who was in the photo.
With the setting sun, the scene was already melancholic, and the temperature carried the chill of approaching night. The white candles burned silently, and on the white candles, black characters spelled out the word "Memorial." The area around the candles was filled with fresh yellow and white chrysanthemums.
This was unexpectedly an outdoor memorial hall.
So, the person in the photo was Lan Xi's relative?
Xie Cheng furrowed his brow, completely unaware of what was going on. He also didn't understand why Lan Xi brought him here. However, some intuition and experience made Xie Cheng feel that something unpleasant was about to happen.
He didn't have to wait long for that moment.
As Xie Cheng approached and saw clearly who was in the center of the circle of memorial candles, he understood.
His intuition was not wrong.
The person in the photo was unmistakably himself...
This was actually a memorial hall set up for him!
Xie Cheng immediately turned his head and stared at Lan Xi, gritting his teeth and asking, "What do you mean?"
As the moment arrived, Lan Xi surprisingly remained calm and composed. She cleared her throat and then glanced at Xie Cheng, whose face was as dark as night. With an affectionate gaze, she spoke with emotion,
"Xie Cheng, as you have perceived, I brought you here today with a special purpose, arranging all this to convey a straightforward message to you."
"What message?" Xie Cheng wondered.
"Are you in such a hurry to send me on my way? I'm not dead yet, and you've already set up a memorial ceremony for me."
Though it seemed that the time was near, Xie Cheng felt that Lan Xi was indeed pushing him away. Nearly grinding his teeth, he stared at her and asked, "Lan Xi, what have I done to provoke you?"
But before he could finish his question, Lan Xi's face lit up with joy. "You finally stopped speaking nonsense. This time, we're finally on the same wavelength! I've been waiting for you to say those words for a long time! I've long prepared my response!"
Xie Cheng hadn't even had a chance to react when he saw Lan Xi take a deep breath and then focus on him with tenderness and affection.
"Xie Cheng, you have indeed provoked and stirred my heart."
Silence fell upon Xie Cheng. Lan Xi paid no attention to his silence. It was as if she had rehearsed this scene countless times in her mind, knowing her lines by heart. In a poetic and rhythmic tone, she continued,
"So, I sentence you to love me, an indefinite term! From now on, in my world, you will be imprisoned for life!"
Xie Cheng remained silent. He felt that silence was inadequate to respond to this situation. He began to question whether he had even visited the amusement park today, or if everything that had happened was merely a dream he had while lying in bed due to fatigue—a nonsensical nightmare.
The instigator of this nightmare had a sweet face, a figure that could captivate anyone, and innocent yet deep eyes. She was like poison concealed in sugar icing, and at the same time, an enticing trap.
As she gazed into Xie Cheng's eyes, she spoke each word deliberately,
"Xie Cheng, I believe our relationship has long reached this stage. Getting married or not is just a formality, but life demands a sense of ceremony. Since I have prepared all these perfect arrangements, I don't want to waste them. I want to write a perfect ending for our love story and leave it open-ended."
Lan Xi's eyes sparkled with determination as she declared her revolutionary conviction, "So today, here, I, the honorable Lan Xi, solemnly propose to you. I don't mind your fragility, I don't mind your short life, and I am willing to be with you forever!"
After her profound and inspiring speech, only the sounds of insects and frogs remained in the surroundings. Xie Cheng was completely stunned, feeling as though he had lost the ability to speak.
Who among normal people could utter words in this situation?
Before coming to the amusement park, Xie Cheng suspected that Lan Xi might confess her feelings. However, he never expected to be so utterly mistaken. Lan Xi didn't confess at all; she went straight to a marriage proposal! And she even set up a memorial hall in this desolate wilderness!
What does this mean? Is it a threat?
He refused, so she turned the proposal into a funeral procession?
And the ellipsis that left their relationship unfinished?
Xie Cheng felt that between him and her, it might be better to draw a period representing closure!!
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