Naruto: Uchiha's Unserious Saga - Chapter 347: Stall Funan? Sure, Let Me Just Die Real Quick

My end was not majestic, my beginning was not beautiful, but I will make damn sure that I rise once more. No more shall I bend a knee, no more shall I hide, no more shall I cower. No more shall the light guild my path, for only Darkness remains.

***

Killed by the universe's greatest killer, Truck-Kun. My existence was twisted as I gazed up at King-Yama, staring down at me with revulsion, “You sick bastard, you ate people.” He bellowed, glaring at me with disgust.

Snorting, I gathered my courage raising my head high and proud, my voice carrying a hint of pride, “So what, have you ever tried it...Let me ask you, have you ever had sex.”

A bewildered expression hung on his rugged appearance as he absentmindedly nodded. A slight smirk crossed my face as I declared, “then have you ate ass,”

“WHAT!!!” He balled in panic, shivering like a guilty man on trial.

“HAHA, you call me disgusting, but it appears you were sucking ass, now that is truly disgusting. I don't judge, but if you ask me, I will stick to cannibalism.”

“THAT NOT A FAIR COMPARISON, YOU LITTLE SHIT,”

The Apocalypse is in full swing. Defiled - powerful creatures corrupted by the Great Collision - prowled the lands in search of prey. Unfortunately for them, the human race had long since retreated behind the secure walls of the Sanctuary of Everlast. During one of his regular excursions outside the Sanctuary, Alden is separated from Celeste. - his childhood friend and crush. In that moment, he came to regret never summoning the courage to confess. Somehow managing to survive thanks to some trickery, Alden awakens as a mage. Instead of receiving a normal power, he gains the ability to decay. What’s more, during his ascension, he received a vision from his future self advising him not to trust the Asterons - celestial beings who had saved his race from inescapable doom. Normally... such a revelation wouldn’t faze Alden. However, there was only one major problem with the declaration, though. Celeste was bound with an Asteron. And not just any normal Asteron... She had made a pact with one of the Divine Sovereigns.

Ling Chen, the number one prodigy in the Martial World, lost all his cultivation and martial arts when his sect encountered a major disaster.On the brink of death, Ling Chen accidentally obtained the divine martial arts text, ‘’Ling Tian Sword Scripture‘’, and was able to repair his meridians.From then on, he began to understand the Sword Way, condense the Sword Heart, comprehend the Sword Intent, and ultimately became a Sword God of his generation!

A decision can destroy the sun, moon and stars. A finger can kill the Heavenly Overlord. While chatting, the Heaven and ten worlds can be annihilated.

A poor little kid walks out from a remote mountain area while holding the Nine Dragons and the Incredible Cauldron. With a control over the time and space eternally, he embarks on the Path to God where he defies the odds of the boundless universe gaudily by fighting against royalty and clashing with the legendary generation.