Unable to Cultivate, I Can Only Raise Soul Pets - Chapter 5

Guys here is my pitch.....In the sprawling world of fantasy, we’ve often been treated to tales of heroes reincarnated with divine blessings, legendary powers, or cheat-like abilities, thrust into magical lands as shining saviors—or chaotic terrors. But what happens when the very concept of reincarnation becomes a curse? When the divine boon is a big fat joke, and the “cheat system” doesn’t quite… cheat?Enter John, the unluckiest reincarnate. Blessed by a god and thrust into a fantasy world, he dreams of glory, power, and adventure—only to wake up as a normal, utterly powerless bird. Not a mythical phoenix, not an ancient thunder eagle. Just… a bird.To make matters worse, this world is no ordinary realm. It's a land scarred by the devastating legacies of past isekai’d heroes and villains, whose reckless exploits piled skeletons into mountains and turned their cheats into harbingers of chaos. Fed up with these unruly intruders, the ancients of the realm banded together to create a world-shaking seal: all reincarnated souls are trapped in the bodies of harmless animals, confined to isolated sanctuaries that function more like fantasy zoos.Here’s the twist: this isn’t mercy. It’s a resource grab. The powerful beast tamers of this realm have turned these reincarnated souls into exotic pets, prized for their cheat-like potential.John finds himself at the bottom of the food chain in every sense. His cheat doesn’t work. His human form is gone. And his world is filled with predatory cultivators who see him as either a snack or a tool.But John isn’t one to give up so easily. What starts as despair quickly turns into cunning survival. With wings and wit as his only tools, John must navigate layers of misfortune, dodge fate’s sharp talons, and cheat his way through a world determined to keep him grounded.Get ready to join John on a wildly unconventional journey—one where reincarnation isn’t a ticket to greatness, but a death sentence he’s determined to rewrite. His story is one of humor, wit, and persistence, as he explores a world where he is the joke and his survival is the punchline.Main tags: reincarnation/isekai, beast taming cultivation system, comedy, action, adventure.Of course No-harem!

The Fu family in Liushan Village has had boys for generations, and was so poor that only boys were left, and they finally hoped for a daughter. As soon as the little girl was born, the grandmother who was almost dead was so happy that she recovered from her illness; as soon as she went out to pick up things and found her hands were soft, all the birds and animals flying in the sky, swimming in the water, and running in the mountains fell in front of her, like a pie falling .

I thought that picking up gold would be powerful enough, but I didn’t expect to find a husband on the way, who is still quite a powerful person.

Ever since she was born in Fujia, it has been smooth and smooth, and she has never failed to do business and build a house. The family members treat her dearly and spoil her to death.

Chen Meimei was 180 cms tall with rolls of fat all over her body. When she walked, she would jiggle left and right, like a big pumpkin.

Fu Bainian was a handsome man with a tall, slender build, and wherever he went all eyes would follow him. He walked in the spotlight and lived like a movie star.

When their parents proposed marriage, Fu Bainian sneered and thought to himself, ‘she’s a toad wishing to eat swan meat’. He firmly rejected any thoughts of marriage.

But then…

“Hey look, President Fu’s following Chen Meimei again!”

“Isn’t President Fu slapping his face at this point?”

Great President Fu had a bitter expression on his face. He had no choice! Who decided to let the person that he’d secretly loved for so many years be reborn into the body of such a fatty?!

The ancient Divine Beast Susu descended to endure trials and became the youngest daughter of the Qin Family, who were nearing eighty years old; young in age but high in seniority, even the men in their twenties had to call her auntie.Susu was also the only girl in three generations of the Qin Family, cherished by her parents, doted on by her brothers, and her nephews would fight over holding their auntie and protecting her.Protect her? Susu said she didn't need it, for she was a mighty and ferocious Divine Beast!With her around, no one would dare to bully the Qin Family members!Those who bullied her family got sent flying; those who coveted their fortune got sent flying; those who tried to kidnap her got sent flying.The kidnappers who captured Susu were frightened by her and willingly handed over their cell phones for her to call the police.“How do I unlock the cell phone?” Susu asked.“It requires fingerprint unlocking, you can use my finger,” explained the kidnapper.“How do I use your finger? Chop it off?” Susu asked again.“No! No need to chop, it can be used while still attached to my hand!” the kidnapper wailed.Chop off a finger! What kind of thought process was that?Way too scary!Ever since the lucky-buff-carrying Susu had come to their home, the family's luck had improved, their business prospered more each day, and the previously naughty young masters had become much better behaved, truly a little lucky star.It was just that boy from the neighbor's house, who kept thinking about kidnapping Little Susu, causing the Qin Family men quite a bit of concern.Maybe they should just break his leg again?