Zhang San, please behave yourself! - Chapter 11 - : That human... 3 times to me!

During the Chunin Exams, a mysterious screen hijacks Konoha's arena, broadcasting the shinobi world's most shocking secrets, pivotal future events, and utterly embarrassing moments, sending Kages, legends, and genin alike into a hilarious frenzy.The air crackles with anticipation during Konoha's Chunin Exams. Genin face off, crowds roar... and then, BAM!A gigantic projection screen materializes out of thin air above the packed arena, silencing everyone. This is not on the schedule. Before anyone can react, it flickers to life, broadcasting scenes that should never see the light of day.Get ready for reactions that rewrite history (and dignity):Mei Terumi (Fifth Mizukage): *Eyes widening, then narrowing suspiciously*: “Hold on... Madara Uchiha's 'invincible' fire style... extinguished by a Water Barrier? Is this some kind of advanced Genjutsu prank, or did someone seriously just splash water on the apocalypse?”Ōnoki (Third Tsuchikage): *Clutching his lower back*: “My aching joints! And the screen says I'm going to willingly ride atop the Fourth Raikage like some kind of... decrepit flying squirrel?! Preposterous! My back couldn't take that speed!”A (Fourth Raikage): *Face turning purple, with veins popping* :“WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?! STOP LOOPING THE FOOTAGE OF MINATO MAKING BEE LOOK LIKE A FOOL! TURN IT OFF! BEE, IF YOU START RAPPING TO THIS, I SWEAR I'LL LARIAT YOU INTO NEXT WEEK!”(Nearby, Killer Bee subtly starts beatboxing under his breath, yo!)Hiruzen Sarutobi (Third Hokage): *Sweating profusely as Kushina Uzumaki glares daggers from the stands, holding a spectral frying pan*: “K-Kushina, my dear! That scene where Naruto painted the Hokage Monument... again... it was taken completely out of context! He was... expressing youthful exuberance! Yes! And I definitely didn't bribe him with ramen to clean it up! Please, listen to reason... and put the ethereal kitchenware down?”Danzō Shimura: *Eyes colder than ice*: “Exposing Root operations? Revealing my contingency plans... or lack thereof in that particular future? Unacceptable. This screen poses a threat to Konoha's stability. It must be... Eliminated Permanently.” (He discreetly signals an Anbu who immediately bowed).Uchiha Madara (From an undisclosed location, sensing a disturbance in the Force... err, Chakra) : “An unseen hand manipulating the narrative? Revealing destiny's secrets before their time? Insolence! Who dares play director with my grand stage?!”From Kage summits gone wrong to legendary shinobi's secret guilty pleasures (did Jiraiya really wear that?), the screen reveals all.The entire shinobi world watches, mouths agape. Hidden truths are dragged into the sunlight, future tragedies are foreshadowed, alliances tremble, and enemies start taking very detailed notes.One question burns hotter than Amaterasu: 'Who is behind this chaotic broadcast, and what earth-shattering secret will they expose next.'

I had finally done it—achieved the ultimate Paladin build. Maxed stats, impenetrable armor, and so many resistances that death itself had given up on me. I was an unkillable tank, an indomitable force. Nothing could stop me.And then my PC exploded.I died.Irony, thou art a cruel mistress.But instead of the afterlife, I woke up as my Paladin character… in the wrong freaking genre. Instead of castles and dungeons, there were people flying around on swords, shooting qi beams like fantasy laser guns.“This is definitely the wrong genre,” I muttered, watching a pompous young master sneer at me.“Kowtow, kiss my foot, and beg for forgiveness!” he declared.I looked at my imaginary maxed-out health bar, then at his flimsy silk robes.Oh, this was going to be fun.

# simulator

Bai Yi transmigrated to a fantasy world and awakened the Immortal Cultivation Simulator. The longer he managed to survive in a simulation, the better the rewards he would obtain.

[You were born into a poor family… you died due to hunger.]

[You were born into a rich family that runs a business… you were killed by kidnappers.]

After failing more than 30 times in the Immortal Cultivation Simulator, Bai Yi wondered whether he was unfit for cultivation. Therefore, he had to rely on others to go through the simulation for him!

[Chen Qianxue, the Holy Maiden of the Soul Sword Clan, has entered into the Immortal Cultivation Simulator upon your invitation.]

[Age 0, Chen Qianxue was born into a poor family.]

[Age 5, Chen Qianxue picked up the manuscript of the Sword Cultivation Technique by chance.]

[Age 8, Chen Qianxue was at the first level of the Qi Refinement stage.]

[Age 164, Chen Qianxue failed while attempting to break through to the next stage. She died due to sudden, unbearable power pushing through her meridians.]

[You acquired the following rewards…]

[…]

Louie became a mythical dragon that was capable of traveling between Earth and the Otherworld at will.

From this point on, the number of races in the Otherworld became more plentiful. His territory was orderly and clean, with incredible cuisine, countless novelties, and civilization and philosophy ahead of the whole world.

On Earth, his existence caused the rebirth of magic and mythology, allowing him to become the only God.

“I am the Golden King, the Giver of Life, the Champion of Magic, the Weaver of Dreams, the Guardian of the World, the Master of Time. Let mortals bow down before me and look up! Let the Gods tremble in fear before me!”