[BL] Debut in Interstellar After Retiring as Grim Reaper-Chapter 261 - 259: White Chamomile

Chapter 259: White Chamomile

White Chamomile is an emotional song about a gentle rebirth. When he was a child, Lin Yu’s mother really loved the flower’s significance to life.

About the gentle strength it conveys, like the small white petal around that little round yellow that looks like the sun. Chamomiles are associated with purity and rebirth. His mother would take care of the flowers like her child, often also even chatting with it as if the flowers could respond to her daily whispers.

His mother would always says be like a white chamomile that symbolizes personal growth and empowering one’s action within every challenge that may be faced.

Every time Lin Yu came from home, he would find his mother in their garden beside those white chamomiles. The orange lays from the sun setting down behind her and the warmth wind breezing soothes the exhaustion inside him.

That was the most important memory of his mother and also the last thing that he would always remember.

That white chamomile was also the last gift he gave after her death from an illness caused by mental pollution. However unlike others who died with the agony of pain, his mother closed her eyes with a smile for them. She held those flowers with her and brought them forever.

With this song, Lin Yu hopes that the warmth that he always felt from those little flowers would give others too and soothe their spirit.

****

Since the focus of the group is about their vocals, Lin Yu simply arranges them sitting beside each other horizontally. What was more important is the emotions that they must convey on stage.

"Before we begin, I want to ask everyone," Inside the training room, Lin Yu was sitting in front of them with his usual gentlemanly smile. "How is your journey here? Can everyone share their thoughts after several rounds of competition?"

The young men looked at each other before Xing Ren raised his hand slightly with a smile. "Can I go first?"

"Sure."

"Actually I haven’t really thought too much about what happened." Xing Ren begins with a soft sigh. "What happened for the past few rounds was like a roller coaster of emotions that I couldn’t even process properly then I had to compose myself because there’s more to come."

He paused. "It was really hard but I also think that those struggles made me reach this rank right now— besides the people who supported me too, of course."

Lin Yu nodded at his words. "It’s true. Even when I was a trainee, there were too many happenings and time flies so fast that you have to compose yourself. Seeing your friends said goodbye was a heartache but in this competition, one must strive harder to make their dreams closer."

"How about the others?" he asked.

Sheng Yan raised his hand slightly. "Can I go next, Teacher?"

"Hmm,"

Sheng Yan was silent for a second before speaking. "This was actually more than a roller coaster for me. Because who would have thought that I’ll be connected with the Sheng family?"

"..." Others didn’t expect the latter to be more direct this time and actually mentioned the Sheng family. This matter was not mentioned ever since the truth was exposed but it was obvious that the young man was affected.

He received a lot of hatred from everyone and that was the biggest seatback in his life more than this competition. The isolation they did was the hardest for him because before that incident, he had many friends who really encouraged him inside the competition.

Outside Sheng Yan didn’t have that because of his status in the Sheng clan. They were just a small branch that was often left unnoticed or even served as someone they could run around, thus leaving him with no confidence. Only when he entered here did he begin opening himself.

Yet who would have thought how fast they turn their backs to him after that? But Sheng Yan felt he had no choice and accepted that cruel fact.

And although in the end he was found innocent, what was ruined couldn’t just go back that easily anymore. That friendship that he had with them isn’t even worth for them to bring back again.

Sheng Yan didn’t pursue them and chose to stay silent.

"... I want to take this as an opportunity to thank Chen Wei." A relieved smile finally appears on his face again.

The little friendship that he developed with the young man was totally unexpected. They are way too opposite to each other. Even when things weren’t on their way, they didn’t interact nor care about each other.

One was busy about the isolation while the other was busy denying how his status wasn’t the way he thought about it. The sudden duo just came abruptly to them and they just found themselves in the same situation— where only themselves can stay together at times of that.

Throughout that time, they both realized they might not be suited inside the circle in this competition. They were like standing on the edge and couldn’t take a step forward because no one really welcomed them.

Lin Yu nodded with relief on his face. He was thankful that the young man was finally out of that desolate zone. His performance after the incident was greatly impacted and thus they also didn’t know how to help him. Fortunately the young man thought about it and used that as his encouragement to just work harder.

While others are also sharing their thoughts, Qin An noticed Gu Yijin was just silent. Even though the young man was always like this, his eyes were lowered and seemed to be thinking about something else.

"Then who can share next? Can Classmate Gu do it?" Still when Lin Yu called for him, the young man didn’t respond.

"Classmate Gu?" Lin Yu calls. Qin An slightly nudged Gu Yijin beside him.

The latter flinched a bit after coming back to his senses. However he chose to ask not to share instead in front of everyone and thus ended their discussion quite awkwardly.

Fortunately Lin Yu carried the atmosphere and began discussing the lyrics of the song all throughout the meeting.

After that, he let them have a half an hour break before officially starting listening to the song of White Chamomile. 𝒻𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘸ℯ𝒷𝘯𝘰𝑣ℯ𝑙.𝘤𝑜𝘮

While others went outside the training room, Gu Yijin chose to stay and surprisingly Qin An too. The two didn’t move from their position until they were left together.

Silence envelopes them until the young man breaks the ice.

"Why are you still here?" Gu Yijin asked because he thought that Qin An would leave so he could be with He Yan and others.

Qin An instead asked a question too. "Are you okay?"

Gu Yijin was stunned.

"You’re not doing yourself earlier. Something’s bothering you?"

"..." Gu Yijin stayed silent and stared at the young man.

To be honest they are not that close unlike others. They haven’t been in a group and thus have less interaction with each other. If there was one time they had time together, it was when the family members visited and it was only them who had not anyone else.

It’s just that for Qin An, he had many people that suddenly surrounded him and thus became just like everyone else.

Unlike him.

Due to his lone-like personality, Gu Yijin can’t say that he’s close to anyone else that much. Even with the group performances, they talked mostly about what to do in the team and personal topics are rare especially for someone like him who won’t take initiative to share.

If Qin An was the trainee who had previously distanced himself but found beginning to open his heart, Gu Yijin was like a stilled lake.

Calm and was just letting the water on the lake flow without saying anything else.

Gu Yijin tried to change though but he just didn’t seem to know how. Thus when he saw Qin An’s changes, he suddenly wanted to be paired with him and know how to do it himself.

Unfortunately he lost to Nan Moyi. Now that his partner Jiang Mo got eliminated and all the trainees that were left were not within his comfort zone, he was left at a loss.

He couldn’t even bring himself to share anything earlier.

Gu Yijin even begins doubting himself if he can still go on. Because he knew that in this type of competition, it was not enough to have outstanding skills, one must have the ability to be fit inside a group.

Each of them seems to have already built their circles together while he still stayed outside. He thought how could he be worthy of being in a group in this situation?

Gu Yijin was never unsure of his decisions in the past.

Now Qin An was beside him and asking a question, he should do something else, right?

The young man opened his lips hesitantly and was about to finally say something when the door of the training room abruptly opened and a staff member was seen huffing in anxiety.

"Classmate Qin, please come with me immediately!"

As the young man stood and was about to leave, Gu Yijin didn’t know why his own body just moved and grabbed the young man’s wrist.

Qin An stopped and looked at him.

"... Can I go too?"

The staff changed his expression. "Classmate Gu, I’m sorry but this is a personal situation—"

"It’s fine," Qin An cut him off while still looking at him.

"He can come."

Those were only three words but Gu Yijin felt it was more than enough to erase the uncertainness inside his heart.

*****