Mage Manual-Chapter 1477 - 1077: The Split Between Emotion and Reason

Miss Vosloda did not immediately respond to Ash’s question. She cut one-sixth of the molten lava cake with her knife and fork and stuffed it into her mouth, the overflowing cream smudged on the corners of her mouth, just like a child.

Today, she draped a black velvet shawl over her shoulders, wore black knitted fingerless gloves, and beneath her navy blue coat was a skirt. Her small handbag was placed on the table. She looked every bit like a noble girl out to enjoy the snow, exuding an effortless grace in her every move. A slight lack of elegance only served to highlight her unrestrained charm and innocence.

Ash wasn’t surprised, after all, she was never raised as a lady. Eight years ago, she was still the ’playboy’ Felix. When Ash first saw her on the train, she was being chased by a gang as the second son of a noble... Back then, Ash didn’t even know she was a girl.

It was only later, when he met Filly in the Allstars Prison, that he vaguely guessed the truth. But now that he thought about it, ever since he returned from the Allstars Prison, he hadn’t seen Felix in her male disguise...

"Are you asking on behalf of your friend?"

Noticing the teasing look in Felix’s eyes, Ash had a twitch at the corner of his mouth, and a black line appeared on his face: "Is it fun to tease me?"

"Of course it’s fun." Maybe because the cake was so sweet and delicious, Felix smiled brightly and said, "I won’t ask who it is, but it’s not hard to guess."

"Actually, I’m surprised you’re asking about this. Doesn’t ’liking for some unknown reason’ happen to you often?"

"How could it be."

"Isn’t that so? I thought you were always falling in love with everyone you meet, considering every pretty girl your lover, like an indiscriminate trash bin."

"Are you still teasing me?!"

Felix chuckled, biting her fork and said, "But seriously, is there really such a thing as ’liking for some unknown reason’? I don’t believe there’s nothing about them that makes you like them. Even for me, seeing her in the bath makes me blush looking at her chest, legs, or hips..."

"The kind of liking you’re talking about certainly exists. Appreciating beauty is a human instinct. Who doesn’t like pretty girls?" Ash took a sip of sweet milk. "Honestly, I kind of miss the days with Igula and Harvey. Being with you girls day and night is really testing my self-control..."

"Eh?" Felix tilted her head, "Including me?"

Ash glanced at her and casually returned to the main topic, "But liking in appreciation is different from the liking I’m talking about. Liking the spring doesn’t mean picking flowers, liking summer doesn’t mean catching cicadas, liking autumn doesn’t mean keeping the falling leaves, liking winter doesn’t mean hiding the snow... You appreciate a scene, but you don’t want to keep it forever, because the next moment you may want to see the mountains and rivers, see the Void Realm; you won’t bind yourself to one view forever."

"But the liking I’m talking about is that kind of..."

He paused, seemingly embarrassed, and said in a complex tone, "It’s the kind where you want to be together all the time, bound forever, sharing lives."

Felix blinked and fell silent, seemingly impressed by his words.

A moment later, she couldn’t help but say, "Putting that someone aside, is it that you want to bind yourself to the Sword Maiden, Witch, and Silver Lamp Female Mage, wanting to be with them all the time, share lives, and preferably live together?"

Ash blinked and nodded, "Yes, is there a problem?"

"Got it." Felix patted her forehead, "You’re not the problem. The main issue is that, back when I mingled in noble circles, most people were scum, but they knew they were scum. Even if they weren’t pleasant to be around, at least their desires were obvious."

"And I rarely associated with people like you—clearly a scumbag yet seriously discussing pure love." Felix shrugged and explained, "It feels a bit awkward to say, but it’s like seeing a puddle of vomit talking; it’s off-putting and a bit disgusting..."

"If it’s awkward to say, then don’t say it!" Ash took big bites of his cake to cover up his defensiveness, "I get it, I’ll finish and leave!"

"I’ve never seen such a sensitive trash bin like you." Felix chuckled, "My father..."

She paused and suddenly returned to the point, "I get what you mean. Normally, if both your values and actions can’t accept someone, at the most, you’d lust over their body. You wouldn’t want to be together."

"You clearly should loathe them from the bottom of your heart, even hate them. Though they haven’t harmed you, their past greatly challenges your moral bottom line... If you’re strangers, you might even curse them to die... It’s clearly unacceptable for you to breathe the same air, them living a second longer is a waste of resources."

"But your emotions and reason are split. Rationally, you want to distance yourself, but emotionally, you want to get close. It’s like having two fat llamas fighting in your mind, hence the struggle."

Ash nodded repeatedly, unable to help but commend, "Exactly, Felix, you’re basically speaking for me, perfectly summarizing my inner conflict!"

Felix gazed at him, took another small bite of her cake, and with a light hum, "Understanding a jerk like you doesn’t bring me joy..."

Ash’s lips twitched, and he politely suggested, "It’d be nice if you could give a bit of respect to the observatory."

"Sorry, unwilling." Felix bit her fork with a sound, "I’d rather not speak if I can’t curse you a bit."

"Suit yourself then." Ash helplessly replied, feeling he indeed deserved some scolding, especially at the moment, "So I don’t understand, why would someone like a person they detest?"

Felix said, "Because they’ve moved your heart once, and in that instant, all their flaws were forgotten. Even if they’re a demon or scumbag, you still wish the moment to last forever... so you end up liking them."

Ash was stunned and suddenly recalled the morning he returned from Hell when he turned and saw the sunlight on the maid’s face. The maid smiled at him, her eyes squinting slightly, as if every eyelash rejoiced at his return.

He took a bite of cake, savoring the rich cream’s happiness on his tongue. He sighed lightly and asked, "Then what should I do?"

"Isn’t it simple? Follow your emotions to continue liking, or follow your reason to despise completely." Felix said, "Is there a third option?"

"At times, battling may be the simplest thing in a mage’s life."

Ash randomly stabbed the cake with his fork, "At least I can use a Miracle to change everything I dislike."